Author Topic: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days  (Read 49151 times)

Offline Bazsmum

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #233 on: August 16, 2009, 21:52:36 PM »
Try not to let him see you giving him direct eye contact... In the wild this indicates confrontation! If he does catch you then blink slowly and turn your head away from him!  :hug: :hug:

Isnt it strange the way they work... So sorry that its being a total mare for you both at the mo, I still have high hope's of him coming through this Miriam... Just that blasted waiting game!  :Luv: :hug: :hug:
« Last Edit: August 16, 2009, 21:53:44 PM by Bazsmum »

Offline miriambuddy

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #232 on: August 16, 2009, 21:19:23 PM »
Buddy is still in 'stray mode', hiding, fearful of outside sounds, only eating & littertraying when I am out of eye sight. i went to Boots yesterday and I found the Bach's rescue remedy but it said that it has to be ingested and I am worried that if I put anything on his food that he won't eat it. His weight gain has not been much this past week even when somedays he can eat as much as 5 packets.
i also got a book from the library called 'Cat Counsellor' by Vicky Hall, in the book, she advises not to give direct eye contact with a 'nervous/timid' cat. "Cats who won't be picked up and whose response to approaches from humans is fuelled by adrenalin; either they escape as far away as possible, freeze or fight with teeth and claw with or without prior warning' She then goes on to give lots of examples of these kinds of cats.

so I'm not sure if I should not look at Buddy so he doesn't feel like he is being watched or of I should look at him so that he knows that I know that he is there to reassure him that he is not alone!
All so confusing!

Offline Shirley

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #231 on: August 16, 2009, 08:31:58 AM »
Such a sad story, Miriam, but hopefully Buddy will soon realise he's home and safe now. Good luck to you both.

Offline Bazsmum

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #230 on: August 16, 2009, 04:02:00 AM »
Hope all went okay at your end this weekend Miriam, did you manage to get him anything to help calm his nerves?  :Luv: :hug:

Offline Liz

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #229 on: August 13, 2009, 20:37:14 PM »
Zylkene is easy just pop the tablet contents on any wet food or nice tuna and they eat the lot!
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Offline miriambuddy

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #228 on: August 13, 2009, 19:25:59 PM »
Thanks for all the wonderful tips guys.
Buddy is still under the sofa. Sometimes when it is quite and he thinks I'm not there, he comes out to eat, realises I am there and either runs back under the sofa (It's against a wall) or he'll check over at me that I haven't moved between each bite. I lay on my front on the floor  to look at him under the sofa but not for to long as I don't want to scare him, just long enough to let him know I am here and to tell him he doesn't need to feel scared anymore
On Saturday I'll look for those rescue remedy stuff. I don't want to put him on medication as I think he has enough to deal with at the mo.
One thing for sure, after being catless for 2 months, my home once again has the cat smell (!) so hopefully he will find some comfort there!.

Offline Liz

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #227 on: August 13, 2009, 14:50:17 PM »
We have our latest trapee Indie on Zylkene and she is a hissy poppet with his but a lashing tiger without it so she will be on it for a couple of weeks till she is speyed

I have to say there is a naturel tablet from the health food shop called Margicol which friends have used on ferals - I have 3 of hers and they are the most chilled out of our lot of ferals - not on it now but they are now all appproachable and have been to the vet - unlike Ace and Blue who was last there for the chop 11 months ago!
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Offline finnjim

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #226 on: August 13, 2009, 13:49:29 PM »
Noone has mentioned the feliway spray version, which can be sprayed around where Buddy is hiding. The advantage being, it starts to work a whole lot quicker. I used a combination of this, the diffuser and skullcap/valerian,which also comes in various forms, with Fifi before, with good results. Fifi, now missing, was semi-feral when she arrived and went into a similar panick mode to Buddies, when she had to be forced to the vet's. Iknow how it hurts to watch the pain your loved one is in, but patience/time is the real healer and it's worth keeping in mind, that for him at least the worst is over.

Offline Amber7

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #225 on: August 13, 2009, 12:02:54 PM »
Bach Flower and rescue remedy is great, but there are also Australian Bush Flower Remedies.. ausflowers.com is the website

Offline Dawn F

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #224 on: August 13, 2009, 12:00:12 PM »
Hi Amber, could it have been Bach?  I know people do use rescue remedy

Offline Amber7

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #223 on: August 13, 2009, 11:59:17 AM »
Hi Miriam.. so happy to hear Buddy came home.. what a long time he was away for.
One of our cats recently went missing but only for a couple of days and we were so sad, I can only imagine what you must have been through all this time.

Friends of mine have used Bush Flower Essences for their cats which are pet friendly and have calming properties and I believe there are some that can help cats who have been traumatised and for change etc.

I realise this sort of approach is not for everyone, but thought I would mention it, just in case it may be helpful.

Am sure Buddy will feel better anyway with your love and attention and in time will be more himself

Offline Rosella moggy

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #222 on: August 12, 2009, 22:25:46 PM »
Not recommending to buy using this link as such but you may want to give Zylkene a try?  Our Dinah is currently on it and doesn't object to the taste in the least.  She was peeing on the duvets and generally hissing at our other 5 cats.  She has it in the morning and it does seem to relax her during the day but she is very active at night so difficult to tell for sure.  I recently got 30 capsules for just over £12 online so worth a try. 

http://www.buyzylkene.co.uk/

So sorry that you and Buddy are having to go through this  :hug:
« Last Edit: August 12, 2009, 22:35:59 PM by Rosella moggy »
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Offline Bazsmum

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #221 on: August 12, 2009, 22:11:08 PM »
Sorry to hear that Buddy is more traumatised than first thought.....I do hope something can be sorted soon, Feliway takes aprox a week to start working so maybe the Serene UM would be a good idea...The drops can easily be added to his food and they are quick acting, just till the Feliway kicks in!  ;) :Luv: :hug:

Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #220 on: August 12, 2009, 17:06:54 PM »
The mental scars are probably there for life, like wih Misa and Sasa but they will fade in time........I dont believe meds will help, its now all TLC and home comforts and getting used to being loved again   :hug: :hug:

Offline Purrrrfect (Shelly)

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #219 on: August 12, 2009, 16:58:31 PM »
I have just read this thread from start to finish and i'm sobbing my heart out with dispare for the missing cat then tears of joy for his return. I have lost a few cats over the years. First was a brother and sister who went missing at the same time but returned 2 weeks later at the same time. They were very dirty and very thin but otherwise ok. The second time was a tabby male who jumped out my first floor flat window and was missing for 6 weeks. I went outside early hours one morning and there he was so i think he was hiding during the day. the third and last time was a 6 month old kitten who went missing and never came back. We eventually moved so i'll never know if she ever returned.

To those who have lost a cat, do as this lady has done and never give up hope of them ever coming home.

Big Purrrs & Hugz. to all.  :hug:

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Offline Christine (Blip)

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #218 on: August 12, 2009, 16:02:38 PM »
Poor little Buddy.  Your vet may be able to offer some short term medication for him?
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Offline Dawn F

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #217 on: August 12, 2009, 09:18:06 AM »
sounds like you are doing everything you can - hopefully the feliway will kick in soon, otherwise there are serenum (sp?) drops you can add to food

Offline Janeyk

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #216 on: August 12, 2009, 09:16:52 AM »
Poor boy, it must be upsetting for you to see him like this Miriam, which I guess could be because he was lost in an unknown area and it has really spooked him out but you can give him all your love and reassurance and keep him safe and sound now and in time his confidence will return.  :hug:
« Last Edit: August 12, 2009, 09:21:15 AM by Janeyk »
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Offline bonnielass

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #215 on: August 12, 2009, 08:04:45 AM »
Hopefully time, lots of love and reassurance will help to heal some of the scars left from his dreadful experiences :hug: :hug:
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Offline bunglycat

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #214 on: August 12, 2009, 00:28:04 AM »
Poor Buddy , god knows what he has been through  :'(  .
Hopefully with all your love and reassurance he will eventually realise he is safe at home with you. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

Offline Tiggy's Mum

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #213 on: August 11, 2009, 23:53:59 PM »
Poor Buddy :care: I'm sure the Feliway will help, it works wonders on Lu although he has never been through what Buddy has  :hug: Time and lots of TLC will be needed too  :hug:

Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #212 on: August 11, 2009, 23:52:26 PM »
My heart goes out to poor Buddy and guess its gonna take a long time for him to recover  :hug: :hug: :hug:

Offline miriambuddy

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #211 on: August 11, 2009, 23:50:09 PM »
Hi guys,
Thanks for your message.
Poor Buddy is still very petrified and hide 99% of the time, currently he is hidden so deeply i need a torch to find him, I put his food near him and he uses the litter tray when I am asleep or at work. It's heart breaking how crushed he is, I think he is still in survival mode and will take him a very long time to realise that he is now safe again.
I've got the diffuser plugged in ( arrived today) and left the light on and the radio on when I went to work and when I am home I sing to him and I leave a light on at night so the house is never in darkness.
I spoke with a local lady today who told me her cat once went missing for 6 weeks and 3 years on, her cat never regained her confidence or feels truly safe. I guess some mental scar are beyond repair.
all I can do is reassurance him and hopefully he will realise that he doesn't have to be scared anymore.

Offline finnjim

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #210 on: August 11, 2009, 12:39:47 PM »
Congratulations on your reunification. Just thought I'd mention that for traumatized cats, I ve found that the Feliway diffuser to be a great calmer. You can get it from your vet. Skullcap&valerian organic tablets can help too, though I prefer the diffuser by far, as it's completely unobtrusive. Of course, nothing can replace TLC, applied liberally all over!

Offline Tiggy's Mum

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #209 on: August 11, 2009, 10:53:31 AM »
How's Buddy today Miriam?

Sending positive vibes for Ted's safe return Dawn  :hug:

Offline moira

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #208 on: August 10, 2009, 16:27:07 PM »
Great to hear that Buddy is back with you, Miriam.

Fingers crossed for Dawn's furbabe.

Offline Dawn3156

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #207 on: August 10, 2009, 14:37:27 PM »
Thanks Miriam, posters are still up in the neighbourhood and my neighbours are all on the case - I miss him so much and worry what he might be going through, still refer to him as present not past. I can't help feeling guilty that I let this happen to him.

Give Buddy lots of love and tlc - he deserves it.

Thanks
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Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #206 on: August 10, 2009, 12:33:39 PM »
It sounds like he had a hard life out there and was scared every minute, so reckon its gonna take a whiile for him to settle. I am sure he lost a lot of sleep too cos was on his guard all the time.

Its a pity he cant tell you about what happened and am sure with loads of TLC he will gradually come round but in his head will always be that terrible 58 days when he had to look after himself and was so frightened.

Offline Bazsmum

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #205 on: August 10, 2009, 11:25:06 AM »
If you hav'nt done already Miriam, I would pop a radio on (some gentle music) for him will actually help to calm his nerves.... ;)


Offline miriambuddy

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #204 on: August 10, 2009, 11:00:12 AM »
Hi everyone,
Buddy spent most of the day under the bed yesterday but in the evening he came out to use the litter tray and sat on the carpet for a while. Every single little sound from the street made him jump, especially the cars and after a while he went back under the bed. On Saturday night, when i turned the lights out for bed, he went hysterical so i left a lamp on all night and he calmed down, also left the light on last night and will continue to so until he feels more relaxed.
Funny, he still was choosy about which food he wants to eat, even though he's so thin!
Slowly, very slowly he will settle back down I believe, his eyes don't look so scared and he does his 'blink' responses when i talk calmly to him.

Dawn, I really hope your little boy Ted comes home soon. It's strange, the week I was beginning to get used to never seeing him again is the week he returned. I hope the people in your neighbourhood have been as kind as the ones who helped me, this morning I went out and took down the lost posters and deliver thankyou cards to everyone who helped me.
Make sure you still got the posters up as one day, the right person will see them.

Offline Dawn F

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #203 on: August 10, 2009, 10:44:37 AM »
what great news, I hope he is a little more settled now

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #202 on: August 09, 2009, 23:40:53 PM »
Can't believe I missed this - you can sleep at night at last Miriam  :)

Great news - I am sure he will calm down. Might be an idea to leave a worn T-shirt where he sleeps to calm him down.
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Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #201 on: August 09, 2009, 23:11:18 PM »
How is Buddy doing today?

Offline Bazsmum

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #200 on: August 09, 2009, 23:07:53 PM »
I have taken a peek at this thread every day and it's wonderful to read that your Buddy has returned.
My handsome little boy Ted has been missing now for 5 weeks, each day he doesn't return my hope fades a little more - this story now gives me some hope that he is out there close by and we will soon be reunited.

You must be over the moon.

Hi Dawn and  :welcome: to Purrs, Sorry to hear your furbabe is missing....Maybe do a thread in this section on your own story...you never know hun!  ;) :Luv: :hug:

Positive vibes for your furbabes safe return..... :hug:

Hope all is okay at your end Miriam!  :Luv: :hug:

Offline sheryl

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #199 on: August 09, 2009, 21:23:41 PM »
Oh Miriam this is FANBLOODYTASTIC news - I cant tell you how pleased I am for you and Buddy xxx

 :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy:

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Offline Dawn3156

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #198 on: August 09, 2009, 20:22:56 PM »
I have taken a peek at this thread every day and it's wonderful to read that your Buddy has returned.
My handsome little boy Ted has been missing now for 5 weeks, each day he doesn't return my hope fades a little more - this story now gives me some hope that he is out there close by and we will soon be reunited.

You must be over the moon.

Offline Bazsmum

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #197 on: August 09, 2009, 02:16:55 AM »
I would'nt rush him either! Just remember to take it slowly with building his meals/water back up......Enjoy!  ;D :hug: :hug:

Offline miriambuddy

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #196 on: August 08, 2009, 23:23:13 PM »
Thanks everyone.
buddy has spend the day in the bathroom on the counter and hasn't budged, even when I had to pop out. Just checked on him and he has now moved to the bath but he declined the food I tried to hand feed him. He is so nervous but hopefully he will soon remember that  this is home.

I hope to take him to the vet next week, as that is where his saga began, I don't wan't to rush him, just take it easy for a few days.

Offline Mollyrock

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #195 on: August 08, 2009, 22:25:00 PM »
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!  :cheer: :yayyy: :attention: :ooops: I am absolutely delighted for you  :wow: :wow: :wow:

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Re: Lost - my beautiful Buddy - Traumatised but home after 58 days
« Reply #194 on: August 08, 2009, 21:25:13 PM »
Fantastic Buddy is back home   :Luv:
 :hug: xxx
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