Purrs In Our Hearts - Cat Forum UK
Lost & Found Cats => Lost & Found General => Sorted Lost and Found cats => Topic started by: miriambuddy on June 18, 2009, 20:42:17 PM
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Dear Forum,
I hope some of you can help me.
My beautiful cat Buddy has been missing for a week now, he escaped out of his pet carrier outside the vets as the clasp snapped, the vet's is not in his neighbourhood so he doesn't know where he has run off too. I have done tons of posters, leafleting, animalsearchuk, vets, shelters, etc. I've been called out to 6 different sighting, racing out the door full of hope but it is never my Buddy. I've patrolled out over and over and over again, calling his name and tapping his bowl.I live alone and he is my best friend, I can't cope without him. He isn't microchipped as the vet never spoke to me about it before.
We've lived together for 8 magical years and I just can't believe he is not here.
I put a poster outside the main town's supermarket today and a I saw a lady writing down the phone number and said to her it is my cat, had she seen him. She told me that on Saturday, the day after Buddy went missing she saw a cat in an RTA several miles away from where he went missing and the cat died in her arms. Her son came and wrapped the cat in newspaper and buried it.
How can I know for sure if this is my beloved, he never went far from home.
I can't take this pain, being without him, my whole world is completely destroyed. He is all I have. I can't go anywhere without seeing a poster I put up with his beautiful face on it.
I'm just so destroyed, I can't take this.
Please, tell me what I can do.
Thankyou
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:hug: awww my heart goes out to you it really does, I wish could I could help I feel so upset for you :hug: I can't think of anything else to suggest hopefully some one can suggest something else.
What I can say though is don't feel alone you can always come on here for support :hug:
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Oh no! What a cutie Buddy is.
Where about are you? There might be some local forum members who can help.
There's also some good advise topics at the top of this section.
I hope Buddy is home soon :hug:
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Oh Miriam I'm so sorry you've found us at such a difficult time ... we all know the pain and heartache when a furbabe goes missing.
Whereabouts are you? and where did Buddy go missing?
Please don't give up on your baby. Also have you tried visualisation? http://www.purrsinourhearts.co.uk/index.php/topic,14171.0.html
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Can I ask though - did the lady say the cat looked your Buddy? I guess they didn't take him to the vets to check for microchip?
I will keep everything crossed for good news for you xx
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Me and Buddy live in Acton, West London. The lady who saw the RTA cat had not seen his picture before today and they didn't take that cat to the vet so I'll never know.
I just read the visualisation but how can you keep your breathing calm when all you can do is cry?
I made fish fingers for dinner earlier and as always I cooked one extra for him. It's still sitting on the grill. Why isn't he here to eat it?
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Oh hun my heart goes out to you it really does :hug: I inow when my boy went missing I was a complete and utter wreck and I know that feeling of constant crying.
I really wish I had a magic wand to bring your baby (and all the other missing furbabes) back home to you and their owners.
I know it's not much comfort but you are amongst friends here and we all understand how you are feeling so if you need a cyber shoulder to cry on you will find plenty here xxxxxxx
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Me and Buddy live in Acton, West London. The lady who saw the RTA cat had not seen his picture before today and they didn't take that cat to the vet so I'll never know.
I just read the visualisation but how can you keep your breathing calm when all you can do is cry?
I made fish fingers for dinner earlier and as always I cooked one extra for him. It's still sitting on the grill. Why isn't he here to eat it?
:grouphug: I'll say a special prayer for you and your Buddy tonight
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Me and Buddy live in Acton, West London. The lady who saw the RTA cat had not seen his picture before today and they didn't take that cat to the vet so I'll never know.
I just read the visualisation but how can you keep your breathing calm when all you can do is cry?
I made fish fingers for dinner earlier and as always I cooked one extra for him. It's still sitting on the grill. Why isn't he here to eat it?
:grouphug: I'll say a special prayer for you and your Buddy tonight
Me too! :grouphug:
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So sorry to hear about Buddy being missing - really hope he comes home soon safe and sound :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
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My heart goes out to you as i know the pain ,as others also do of loosing a furbabe all i can do is send lots of homing vibes for Buddy.s safe return and lots of :hug: :hug: :hug: for you,
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Thankyou everyone for your very kind words, It means a lot to know there are people out there who understand how I feel.
I have to go back to work today, if I can make it through the day without crying it will be a miracle as silent tears are already falling. I work outside so can't just run to the ladies when the tears fall but I know my colleagues will help me as much as they can. Maybe the distraction of work will help.
I'll never give up hope, like the lady on here who has been looking for her cat since 2006, I'll be just like her.
Thankyou
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I have family in Ealing so I'm often over there it that is any help I don't mind leafleting or something - which vet were you at?
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I'm sorry to welcome you to Purrs in such worrying circumstances, Miriambuddy. One of our members lost a cat in exactly the circumstances you describe and she found him between the vet and her own home: he was trying to make his way home. How far from your place in Acton is the vet?
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I hope you hear some postive news soon hunnie :hug: :hug:
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:hug:
I hope you get him home soon.
Have you looked at the area on google earth? It may help you pinpoint some green areas you didnt know about and could be a hide out for him.
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:(
Thinking and hoping for you, :hug:
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Thankyou everyone.
Buddy was lost from Goddards vet on Horn Lane Acton. Part of my anger now is why the vet didn't offer to microchip him on all his annual visits, I never heard of it before this disaster.
In walking terms, the vet's is about 7 minutes away, ironic he is so near but at the same time so far from home. For this journey he would have to go through two sets of traffic lights though. The back way is split by mainline railway tracks so that rules out going through gardens.
Otherwise is is just rows and rows of streets until hitting the main high street or in the opposite direction, the A406.
Just the not knowing is impossible to deal with.
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:care: :grouphug: :wish:
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Buddy will be trying to make his way home, Miriambuddy: that's what cats do :hug:
You need to leaflet the intervening areas, and don't forget that Buddy can walk where you can't, so nowhere is ruled out. Seven minutes for you is seven minutes for Buddy too, so he may be very close but just disorientated.
We've seen so may cats come home in these circumstances, so keep positive, but leafletting is a must.
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Although dont rule out a certain area just because you have already been there, sometimes they are afraid to come out or maybe just asleep!
Go to the furthest area you are searching, then on your way home call him, take the contents out of your hoover bag and sprinkle a path for him to follow home....
Very best of luck! :Luv: :hug:
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wow, thankyou for all the new tips everyone. I'm gonna make more leaflets tomorrow now as I have run out. Thankyou all for giving me hope. I hope can return the kindness.
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:hug: that's what we're here for and never give up hope
Keeping everything crossed for you xx
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Hello Miriam and :welcome: to Purrs
Pleased to have you on board but sorry that you have found us under such sad circumstances
I wish you good luck in finding Buddy
Please come home soon Buddy
:where:
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Any news? :hug:
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Hi B,
Thankyou for your comment.
I leafleted further afield and got several sighting calls. Last night, I bumped into the cat the calls are generating, like mine a tabby with a beige belly but it is a very young cat where as my Buddy is 8 years old.
A week after my cat went missing, ANOTHER cat escaped from the same vet's!, I couldn't believe it! That one is an 8 month old still with her side shaven from an operation. Then when I was on cat patrol last night, I bumped into a lady who was leafleting for her missing cat!, so now I am looking out for 3 little cat's!.
More and more I am thinking that the cat seen in a fatal RTA was mine as it happened after the day he went missing, he was a back garden cat and wouldn't understand cars. The family that witnessed it buried the cat themselves and are too uncomfortable to speak about it so I have very limited details except the date it happened and that it 'looked very like' my cat.
I'll keep searching though.
I read through previous posting in the forum and it gives me strenght.
In my internet searching, I read a story by a guy who consoled himself by believing his missing cat ran away to kitty circus, I like this theory.
Now there are 3 cats missing here, I like to believe that there must be some fantastic kitty club somewhere, maybe they got a great tree house and hang out all together, their version of Heaven on earth.
Thankyou so much, Miriam
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Hi again Miriam,
Cant believe it has happened again! >:( :( What are they playing at!!! :Crazy:
I think when you meet others in similar situations to yourself it makes you believe in what you do...you are doing everything correctly! :Luv: :hug:
I like the idea of that Kitty Circus....Im sure many peeps cats have visited there as it does its turn all over the world! :Luv: :hug:
Keep well! :grouphug:
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Hi Forum,
My Buddy has been missing for 17 days now, I've done every recommendation going but sadly no return.
I've even written to Pea at animalthoughts via previous entries on here and I am waiting for my e-mail to be responded to, to see if she will help us.
What I want to ask, is when do you admit defeat?, coming home time after time from searching empty handed. Response to posters and leaflets have dried up ( no call for 4 days now), I've even seen some of my posters ripped down, they are laminated and cabled tied so someone would have to heavily tug at them to destroy them.
To date, there has not been a single sighting.
How can you keep yourself believing that you will ever see your little furball again?
Thanks
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What I want to ask, is when do you admit defeat?,
You don't.
A couple of years ago I myself reunited a cat (Zsa Zsa) with her owners right here in Fulham. Zsa Zsa had been missing for three months! Her family thought they had lost her for ever. Our home is not 500 yards from Zsa Zsa's home, but it is the other side of a churchyard and a mews area so, while it is a straight line for a cat, it is a ziggedy-zaggedy way for a human. Bear this in mind when thinking where Buddy could be.
NEVER, ever give up hope.
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:hug: As Christine says cats have been found after being missing much longer and I'm sure you'll never give up hope, poor you it must be awful but try and keep strong and I'm still keeping everything crossed for you xx
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Thanks J,
My Buddy doesn't have a collar or microchip so I am feeling so much more hopeless. I wish the vet had told me about microchips all the other times he went to the vet but they never did.
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See these 2 links, cats do turn up :hug:
http://www.purrsinourhearts.co.uk/index.php/topic,25801.msg452380.html#msg452380 (http://www.purrsinourhearts.co.uk/index.php/topic,25801.msg452380.html#msg452380)
http://www.purrsinourhearts.co.uk/index.php/topic,25802.msg452386.html#msg452386 (http://www.purrsinourhearts.co.uk/index.php/topic,25802.msg452386.html#msg452386)
Keep up with the posters, he will surface somewhere :hug:
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Hi Miriam, please dont give up hope, my monkey went missing for well over a month and turned up a mile down the road.
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Thanks everyone.
Those two long missing cat's being found are amazing.
I even had a call out this evening, just got back. an elderly man saw a cat in his garden and managed to bring it into his kitchen. The cat was very differnet to my Buddy but it renewed my hope that people have not forgotten about our quest.
I noticed even more of my posters have been torn down but they are still surviving in the main neighbourhood.
I will see if I can borrow the laminator machine at work tomorrow so that I can make some more posters.
Thankyou everybody, you really are all life savers, I hope you all realise just how much.
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Hi Miriam,
I know exactly what you're going through as I am too, Mia (only 17 months old) went missing 10 days ago - I'm heart broken. She is microchipped but she is missing in the countryside so it isn't necessarily helping unless she comes across humans. This is the second Bombay I've lost, Billy was 2 years ago (he has not been found to date) - this is making me even more sad that Mia won't be found either. I'm trying to keep up hope - I've been out with the laminated posters too - I know what it's like - I'm trying to keep up hope but the empty house thing stings every time - I know exactly what you mean. Everyday feels like a further distance from finding them - but my neighbour lost her cat (an indoor cat) for 3.5 months and she just came waltzing back in looking totally fit and healthy so you never know.....let's keep hoping.
Come back Buddy.
Come back Mia.
Come back Billy.
Julia.
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Hi Julia,
Thankyou for your message, to lose two babies, I can't imagine how painful that would be.
They have no idea how much we love them!
This morning I went on about my 9th possible sighting, as usual it's a different cat, everytime I get the feeling of hope in my belly but I know it will be an anticlimax.
I've got in touch with Pea from animalthoughts.com who is a proven animal communicator and she is able to take on our plea which is fantastic. I don't know how it works but Pea is able to, I guess telepathically reach the animal via their photo and can find out if they are dead or alive. If alive, Pea is able to get some indication of their circumstances. I've never had any experience of the 'physic' world but who am I to deny what has proven successful to so many others?
I hope Mia comes home soon, part of the kidding myself about Buddy is imaging he has gone on holiday!, but this is all just trying to find comfort.
What a comfort is it though to have this forum, the days would be so much darker without it.
Take Care,
Miriam
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:hug:
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oh don't give up - don't know if you saw Ron's post yesterday about a cat that had been missing (I think) 244 days and turned up a few gardens away from home and had been being fed by someone most of the time
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This is it: http://www.purrsinourhearts.co.uk/index.php/topic,25802.msg452386.html#msg452386
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Hi everyone,
I hope you are all well.
I've started contact with Pea at animal thoughts, hopefully it will help a lot.
I have a secondary question for you cat experts if I may?.
I received a call earlier from a man who may have seen my Buddy at 2.30 this morning in his back garden helping himself to the resident cat's bowl. what my question is though is that the man said the cat almost moved in a 'feral' way, not like a regular domestic cat. Do cat's in a state of caution and fear revert to their genetic wild/feral way's? He said the cat looked quite dirty as well. Do lost cat's stop grooming?
Thanks,
miriam
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I would certainly expect a domesticated cat which is now fending for itself to slink around cautiously, as it knows it is competing for its food, and that there are other cats out there which might attack it
Tosker comes to my garden every night for food, but although he looks well, he approaches his food belly down and eyes everywhere - and I never see him grooming himself after eating - he is too keen to get back to his garage where he feels safe
Buddy may be hiding out somewhere where he is getting dirty - that could be a clue for you - a storage shed, a coal bunker etc.
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:crossed: Thinking of you and hoping that this is Buddy! Good Luck! :hug:
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We get lots of cats in our garden both domestic and the ferals and tbh there is no difference in the way they behave. None of domestics (even next doors) will come for a fuss nor the ferals. The ferals though do let me get very close within inches (although not to stroke) now as they all know me so well. I would also think that the cat may well be quite dirty. I would ask the chappy to help you with this and try and get a photo of the cat if he sees it again and if he does and it is a certain time it visits then either go round or if it's random borrow a trap. Lots of luck :hug:
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I hope this is Buddy, but in any case, please take someone with you if you go to a stranger's house :hug:
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Hi Christine and everyone,
Thankyou for your info.
My calls are forwarded to me via animal search UK and when i go on an evening check to a house, the boss, Tom, requests me to call him back after so that he knows i go home OK.
I guess being an ex copper is still in his blood!
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Fingers crossed this is Buddy,sending lots of postive vibes for you :hug:
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Hi everyone.
I thought I would let you know, i have had communication from Pea at animal thoughts and Pea has ascertained that Buddy is still alive, yippee!
Now the jigsaw puzzle in trying to find him on the limited information he is able to provide Pea.
Thankyou all for helping us, fingers crossed I can provide some good news.
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:crossed: :best: ;D
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Fingers crossed, i really hope you can find him safe and sound :hug:
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More and more I am thinking that the cat seen in a fatal RTA was mine as it happened after the day he went missing, he was a back garden cat and wouldn't understand cars. The family that witnessed it buried the cat themselves and are too uncomfortable to speak about it so I have very limited details except the date it happened and that it 'looked very like' my cat.
This is going to sound terrible but....
A few years ago a cat was run over in a lane near to a house where my hubby was working. My hubby buried the cat in the garden of the house.
A couple of weeks later an owner came forward, they had been on holiday. Hubby described the cat and it matched their cat. The owners asked if he would dig the cat up as they would like to make sure and also they wanted to take him home to bury.
Hubby of course did this...he said the cat hadnt changed at all by being buried for 2wks (it was their cat btw)
Dont know if you would consider doing this to put your mind at rest either way.
Hope you dont mind me suggesting it :hug:
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you've made me realise, Michelle, that if I am ever in that position I must take photos from every angle in case an owner comes forward
not knowing is the worst thing possible
but hopefully Buddy is out there somewhere waiting to be found
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It does sound horrible but it could give people closure which is so important.
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It does sound horrible but it could give people closure which is so important.
It is! ;)
But we cant forget Fluffy's Monkey when he was missing..... http://www.purrsinourhearts.co.uk/index.php/topic,23298.0.html#bot
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Thinking of you and hoping all is well! :hug: :hug:
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Hi everyone,
With all the clues provided by Pea, I've searched out every possible place. She said that he is hiding in one particular place so on Friday night I even roped my friend in for a midnight search but nothing. The main clues are along the edge of the mainline rail way lines in between my house and the vet where he went missing from, there is a lot of dense shrubbery which slopes down towards the tracks and completely unaccessible. Out again Saturday morning in the light, nothing. Put more posters up, more leaflets, more searching, nothing. Put food out, not touched. Read over and over and over again Pea's clues but couldn't find anywhere with all of the details described. when I was out this morning, I finally realised that Buddy was describing his own back garden, he was very specific about our fence. Pes said that he was weak and hasn't been spoken to by anyone and not eaten anything, he's too scared.
So now, all I can think is that my beautiful Buddy is slowing starvying to death because I can't find him. It is like I am killing him by not being able to find him and bring him home.
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Pes said that he was weak and hasn't been spoken to by anyone and not eaten anything, he's too scared.
So now, all I can think is that my beautiful Buddy is slowing starvying to death because I can't find him. It is like I am killing him by not being able to find him and bring him home.
Sorry but i do not believe in this crap for one min....and nor should you :hug:
what a load of :censored:
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me neither Michelle - I'm afraid there are people out there only to ready to feed other people's anxieties, and some even charge for it >:(
I would expect most cats would survive fairly easily at the moment, given the numbers of young birds and mice around
it is the winter months which are the hardest, and even then few cats die of starvation alone, if they are able to roam
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Miriam, keep your hope up - I thought Mia was gone for good too - we just couldn't believe that she would not come home unless she was badly injured or shut in somewhere. And 2 weeks later she comes back, obviously not injured and she would not have survived 2 weeks locked in somewhere without water in this heat. So sometimes cats can find their way home after surviving out in the wild for a while (my neighbour's cat came back after 3.5 months).
Mia has some new habits - she has obviously had to eat all available food - even though she is eating cat food again I noticed that she wolfs down any insect, fly, spider that she's sees straight away. Needs must I guess - nature is wonderful.
I'm sure if Buddy is out there he'll find you or you'll find him - or someone else will.
My very best wishes to you - keep up hope - I thought I'd looked everywhere but you never know - they can just appear.
(Tend to agree on psychic stuff I'm afraid - it is a load of bunkum and if it is upsetting you even worse....sorry, just my opinion.)
Julia.
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I too am in the (dont believe club) I think its outrageous that because of what she has said you are now feeling hopeless! >:( :(
I am not against people who search out these so called communicators etc....They are the vulnerable in my eyes! :(
Look into your own heart for answers....you know your babe best! :Luv: :hug:
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When my Wizzy went missing i got in touch with Pea it cost me £70 for her to tell me a load of rubbish she told me that she is not always correct in interterpreting what comes through,and i spent hours mulling over what she did tell me,she prays on peoples misery and loss and i havent yet found anyone who she has helped to find their cat or other missing animals,, please dont be taken in by her ,most of the people i have spoke to siad that she has told them their pets have passed over,she then tells you how sorry she is .At £70 a throw i bet she is >:( Please dont sit fretting that Buddy is starving to death as the others say there is plenty of food out there for them and they do survive :hug: :hug:
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Right who is this :censored: Pea ?
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I don't believe in all that old rubbish - If they give you hope, fair enough but given that it is a load of old tosh AND she is making you feel bad, even worse >:( - I agree there are lots of small animals around and cats are expers at scrounging a meal :hug:
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Her name is Pea Horsley and she is an animal communicator, or so she claims, she has her own web site,just key in and up she pops :censored:
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I really hope you find Buddy Miriam, I'm a very level headed person and don't normally believe in 'alternative' thinking such as this but I personally have had a very positive experience with Pea. I would agree with others however that if it's making you feel worse then you shouldn't dwell on what came out of the reading :hug:
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I used a couple of communicators when Lilly went missing. The first one was free and did a reading without a picture or anything and said she was trapped. The second was a paid reading with someone who I think was called Linda and came back that she was alive and in a shed but couldn't escape but that she was patient and was waiting for me to find her and knew she would be found. Like you that tore my heart to shreds and I searched long and hard for her with no joy. The third reading was with Pea and she said she thought she had died. Pea's reading was the only one that gave me specific details about Lilly and her personality and life with us that she couldn't have guessed. There are other reasons why I believe that what Pea said may have been correct but that is another story.
I do think there is something in this animal communication thing but from what I have read, the images and feelings received, is open to interpretation. At the end of the day you know yourself what you have done to find Buddy and there is only so much you can do. It broke my heart when I stopped looking for Lilly and four months on I am still devastated when I think of her. I still hope that one day she will return to me but I had done everything I physically could to find her and couldn't keep going on. I took the view that if Lilly was still alive then, like Buddy, she has her own role to play in keeping herself alive and finding her own food to eat.
If you have the strength to do so, keep searching the area between your house and the vets at different times of the day (maybe if Buddy has a favourite toy take that with you to see if he can be tempted out) but don't beat yourself up over what you have been told. You can't do more than you are doing and you may never know the truth of what has happened to him.
Take care,
Karen
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I'd just like to add that although people often get tricked into believing that these people tell you things that they couldn't know it is an elaborate con trick, same with the people ones. They actually read your signals really well and play on the uneven way that human brains filter information throwing out more negative stuff and paying undue weight on the positive. I studied experimental psychology at Cambridge and I can assure you that in a controlled experiment they do not tell you any more than chance/statistics would expect if you took a likely stab in the dark.
I'm so sorry if you are a believer, if it helps, great - but do not give conmen and conwomen money, this is why they do it - to get money the easy way without any real work. Read up on NLP and you'll find some interesting stuff about micro signals and all sorts...it is total tulip that they can contact your cat.
If I were Pea I'd go for saying that the cat is dead as if you think about it - if the cat comes back alive and well then you're so happy you probably aren't going to go back to her and complain - and anyway she used the caveat that she isn't always right. Neither am I so please give me £70! Go away parasite people.....
Miriam I really hope Buddy finds you or vice versa - here is a fact, my cat came back Saturday after 2 weeks finding food for herself in the fields (no bins, no humans to help) she is now a spider eater....my neighbours cat came back after 3.5 months and looked fitter! If Buddy is out there he can probably feed himself or he will find a human to help. If he isn't out there then there's nothing anyone can do and he is at peace.
Best wishes - stay strong.
Julia
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I'd just like to add that although people often get tricked into believing that these people tell you things that they couldn't know it is an elaborate con trick, same with the people ones. They actually read your signals really well and play on the uneven way that human brains filter information throwing out more negative stuff and paying undue weight on the positive. I studied experimental psychology at Cambridge and I can assure you that in a controlled experiment they do not tell you any more than chance/statistics would expect if you took a likely stab in the dark.
I'm so sorry if you are a believer, if it helps, great - but do not give conmen and conwomen money, this is why they do it - to get money the easy way without any real work. Read up on NLP and you'll find some interesting stuff about micro signals and all sorts...it is total tulip that they can contact your cat.
If I were Pea I'd go for saying that the cat is dead as if you think about it - if the cat comes back alive and well then you're so happy you probably aren't going to go back to her and complain - and anyway she used the caveat that she isn't always right. Neither am I so please give me £70! Go away parasite people.....
Miriam I really hope Buddy finds you or vice versa - here is a fact, my cat came back Saturday after 2 weeks finding food for herself in the fields (no bins, no humans to help) she is now a spider eater....my neighbours cat came back after 3.5 months and looked fitter! If Buddy is out there he can probably feed himself or he will find a human to help. If he isn't out there then there's nothing anyone can do and he is at peace.
Best wishes - stay strong.
Julia
I could not have put this better myself, Julia. I studied psychology at Durham, btw :hug:
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there is also the third possibility - that Buddy has been taken in by someone who is caring for him
no consolation for you, Miriam, at the moment, but not the worst thing that could happen to him :hug:
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there is also the third possibility - that Buddy has been taken in by someone who is caring for him
no consolation for you, Miriam, at the moment, but not the worst thing that could happen to him :hug:
That is a big possibility! ;)
My cat was missing for 13 days trapped in a lock up/garage type building, he lived off spiders and dew and apart from losing some weight and stinking of oil he was fine.....
Still thinking of you Miriam, and sending you more vibes for Buddy's return! :hug: :hug: :hug:
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Anyway, yes, we've been sidetracked a bit (I know I'm partly responsible) and haven't heard from Miriam.
The most important thing, Miriam, is to keep up your hopes and your practical efforts to find Buddy. Trigger may well be right: I looked after Zsa Zsa by feeding her outside until I could catch her and get a proper close look at her: someone may be doing exactly the same for Buddy. Posters and searching are essential :hug:
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Anyway, yes, we've been sidetracked a bit (I know I'm partly responsible) and haven't heard from Miriam.
Sorry think I started that by saying the reading was a load of tosh !!!
My fingers are still firmly crossed that You find him.....Do NOT give up !
Yes posters....and lots of them...
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Hi Miriam,
Hope you are okay? I was trawling the sites as you do and came across a pic of your darling Buddy, hope you dont mind me putting him on here? :shy:
Still thinking of you and wishing you the best of luck in your search! :Luv: :hug:
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Hi everyone.
Thankyou for your kinds words and thoughts.
I can't find him, what more can I say?
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Dont want to sound like a pain in the bum Miriam but it may be worth doing some more fliers, with a pic of him on as poss, also stating a reward for safe return....(dos'nt have to be money, could be flowers, chocs etc).
Please dont give up hope.....cats are pretty amazing when fending for themselves! :Luv: :hug: :hug:
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My posters were animal search UK ones with two clear photos and reward in big letters and a freephone number but all the possible sightings that kind people called about were never of him as I got to meet all the cats they called about
just trying to keep in my mind all the stories of the people who got their cats back after a really long time, I know that there is always a small chance of being reunited with him.
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just trying to keep in my mind all the stories of the people who got their cats back after a really long time, I know that there is always a small chance of being reunited with him.
My own vet told me a story about one of his feline patients. The cat and his owner lived in Dorset. One day the cat went missing and did not return for several weeks. Meanwhile his owner had to move here to Fulham. He gave up hope of finding his cat again but kept in touch with his former neighbours just in case.
Eighteen months after the chap had moved to Fulham, he got a call from his Dorset neighbour: his cat had strolled into their garden one day completely out of the blue. He drove straight down to Dorset, confirmed the prodigal cat was his, and brought him up to Fulham, where they now live happily together.
Never give up hope :hug:
Edited for spelling
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Hi Miriam,
I responded to your lovely comments about rocky on my rainbow bridge thread but just wanted to say how sorry i am for what you're going through. I love Buddy's photo, he looks like such a gent and I feel so sad reading about whats happened. It must be so hard coping with the uncertainty and frustration but don't give up hope. Your boy is clearly so very loved and I just know he will do everything he can to get back to you. Cats are such determined survivors and from all the stories on here of missing cats who make it home, you know there is always hope.
I can't imagine how hard it must be, when my Rocky went missing for four days I was going out of my mind imagining all sorts of horrible scenarios. i was lucky that he made it home (even if it was with broken hips!) and I have always believed that a much loved cat - like your buddy -will fight to survive even more than normal. I really hope you find your faithful companion and he gets to curl up in his directors chair and be spoiled by you.
Sending you lots of :hug:
Nicola
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Am thinking of you Miriam and wishing you well! :Luv: :hug: :hug:
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Thanks Bazsmum.
It's been over a month now. I'm in a strange strain of grieving I think. I keep myself as busy as possible, taking overtime at work etc but no matter how busy you keep yourself, eventually you have to return to an empty home and reality.
The daily biscuits I leave out in the garden are being eaten by a pigeon who's now timid with me. I tell the pigeon, 'go find Buddy and bring him home!, you can see where I can't see!'
I have a family of blackbirds in my tree who are now so relaxed, the mum brings her youngsters right on to my patio, guess there is no one chasing them now!
And two of Buddy's fellow cat friends have been coming into my garden looking for him and looked confused to not find him there, I tell them two also to go look for Buddy!
When you have no choice but to 'carry out' with normal life and you can still laugh at a joke or smile at something, there is always the 'sad' feeling surrounding everything, I know a lot of people here will know exactly what I mean. Feel guilty if tears haven't fallen for a few days in case that means you don't care anymore or something which is so far from the truth. I noticed that I talk of Buddy in past tense more than present tense, like 'He used to this, he used to do that' and then I wonder if I should even be using past tense or not.
Everyday before I went out to work, my words to him would be, 'Bye buddy, mummy loves you' and I now say that to his photo and instead of kissing him, I place a gentle kiss on his chair.
Aaah, I guess the tears have returned!, best go.
Miriam
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Aw Miriam, I know (as do many of us on here) exactly where you are coming from, I hate it when someone is hurting..... :hug:
In reality, we all dont know what has happened to Buddy, I so wish I had a magic wand to make it all better for you! :care:
Alas all we can do is hope...I sincerely mean that Miriam, strange things have happened as you have probably been acknowledging for yourself!
There will always be a story of hope, and you must try to remember that....I am so hoping that yours will be one of them! ;)
Buddy if you are hiding out somewhere and getting tit bits to keep you going, please make your way back home soon! :wish:
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over 6 weeks now since my little Buddy has been missing, I so do miss him.
This morning I was up before dawn as working an early. When I came back out of my bathroom, still dark outside, sitting on my kitchen counter was one of his friends, it was so nice to see a cat in my home!. For the first time in six weeks I opened a packet of cat food to give his friend a snack, I hope this cat visits again, he tends to visit when it is dark outside so not often in summer.
Earlier in the year, this cat ( I call him Fluffy) brought Buddy home as he had got hurt (limping) and as they came over the fence, Buddy looked up at me, his meow was like saying 'Mom, I'm hurt!'. His friend stayed with him until buddy was safe inside, I thought it was sweet of him.
Buddy used to run back inside from a strong gust of wind in the garden, I can't see how on earth he could survive the numerous thunder storms we have had this month.
Aaah, miss him so, so much. I wish I could find him and tell him.
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Thinking of you Miriam and keeping everything crossed that Buddy finds his way home to you xxx
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miriam hun, have you tried leaving an unwashed item of your clothing plus food by the back door ?? i was advised to try it when my joey went missing and he came back, they try and get home by scent... got to be worth a go ... good luck ...
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awww Miriam, hoping Buddy is back with you soon :hug:
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Buddy won't be out in the thunderstorms, Miriam - he will have found himself a little hidey-hole to shelter in - cats always do
it's truly awful for you to be wondering what has happened to him, and if you will ever find him - I can't imagine anything worse - but he is probably doing OK out there, wherever there is - so don't torment yourself unnecessarily - his survival instincts without you are far better than yours without him
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his survival instincts without you are far better than yours without him
Very true! Hang in there Miriam.....C'mon Buddy even your pal is wondering where you are! :cat chat:
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next week I hit 50 days missing, 50 days!, I cannot believe it it such a large number!
Everyday I still put the day old clothes on the line, daily sweepings blow out into the garden and his biscuits get eaten up almost immediately by a pigeon who has cottoned on to there being food available.
For everyone who has gone through this, when does the pain begin to ease?, Some days at work I have to fight to hold my emotions down. At home, I can picture him in every single inch of the home and the garden, playing, sleeping, etc.
I've developed minor health problems, just the stress and anxiety showing itself physically so I'm trying to 'control' the grieving so that the problems only stay minor.
Wow, when life really wants to test you it sure can!
Come home little Buddy, promise I'll give you your favourite food for dinner and more kisses than you can ever imagine. Mummy loves you.
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This must be so very hard but dont control the grieving cos it means that you are bottling it all up and thats what makes you ill :hug: :hug:
I think you have to try and be positive and as you have not heard of anything happening to him, he is probably still alive and therefore he is just missing and maybe in a new home. This of course doesnt help cos it gives you no closure but in your heart and head you need to make a big decision............are you thinking he is on the Bridge and therefore need to grieve properly or is he just missing and therefore you still have hope.
sending loads of these for you :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
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You're right Gill, I don't know for sure if he is on the bridge or not. A friend of mine, last year when she was on holiday, a neighbour was looking after her cats and one went missing. After all her searching with no joy, she consoled herself with the belief that someone else had taken the little one in.
bizarrely I got a call via animal search UK a couple of hours ago, I went out to the call and it was for the same cat that I got about a dozen calls for but very touching that people still have my copy of the missing leaflet. Quite a lot of the calls were from people who had lost a cat themselves once and know how it feels to go through.
I still 'talk' to Buddy everyday. I even wake up super early at the times he would normally tap me on the head to let him out.
I got a couple of his photos made up into 18x12" poster prints, they almost seem life size which I love.
All such a shame.
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I don't know if you have thought of offering to foster a cat for a rescue, Miriam, while you wait to hear any news of Buddy?
would it not help you to have a cat to look after, but not one which would make you feel disloyal to Buddy?
and I would imagine, though I don't know for sure, that a rescue would be very willing to find another placement for the cat if Buddy is found
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Hi Trigger,
TBH, I appear to have been thinking of fostering or something for a while, knowing that there are so many sweet cats out there needing a helping hand. I have learnt so much from the countless Purrs threads I have read through.
I live alone, work full time in the emergency services so my hours are all over the place. Do you think I could still be a suitable candidate?
MY nearest CP is Ealing and West London and I am pretty close to the Mayhew Animal home who take on a lot of animals found/confiscated/rescued by my fellow staff at my police station.
I don't think Buddy would feel betrayed if I could help some of his fellow cousins.
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each rescue has its own rules, but I would guess that being out all day is not considered a problem with older cats, who sleep all day anyway - at least mine do
there are so many cats in urgent need of a good foster home that I'm sure there are several who would be only too glad to bunk down with you for a while
good luck with it :hug:
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Hi,
I don't want to get my hopes up just yet but I had a call from a man who has a stray coming into his garden for a little while. today he managed to take a photo and send it to me, it's t fairly clear and I am about 85% sure that it is Buddy. He says the cat comes round about 7.30 in the morning so I am invited to his home in the morning to check if is Buddy.
If it is, it would be too good to be true.
fingers crossed xxx
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Oh that would be amazing. Fingers crossed for you xx
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:crossed:
Really hope thats its Buddy -that would be fantastic news - good luck
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I so hope its Buddy :hug:
:crossed:
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I so hope that the cat is your Buddy, that would be absolutely fantastic :wow: :crossed:
How far away is this persons house from the vets where Buddy went missing? Also, I'm sure the man is genuine but can you take someone with you when you go to have a look or at least let someone know what time you are going and the address and arrange to text them at a certain time to let them know you're safe :hug:
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so I have spent two hours in the callers garden today, I do believe it is Buddy but I would like to see the belly to confirm but all his tabby markings are in exactly the same places as Buddy, the only different is in the eyes, the pale green colour is right but it could be just a look of caution in the eyes rather than relaxed.
They told me the cat normally is very shy and only comes out once in the morning. With me there, the cat came back about 5 times and they said he looked a lot more relaxed than normal.
But very, very nervous, I couldn't get very close to him without him running away.
I have left a message with my local cat protection branch to ask if could rent their cat catcher/trap box so hopefully they will call me back or I'll go out and buy one.
The couple said they are keeping an eye on him and will keep feeding him.
Question? - can a cat forget their owner after a long separation? (been 7 weeks) or it is that they just are worried about anyone coming near them?
Thanks guys, will keep you updated.
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oh miriam I am so hoping it is him!!!!
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it would be wonderful if this cat is Buddy :wish: :wish:
but I know you will want to be sensible about it - is it certain it is a he?
does the cat show a response to your voice, calling to him as you called to Buddy? I don't think a cat would forget that in 7 weeks, and a lot longer, though it's understandable he might be wary of any human contact after that length of time
but Buddy is microchipped, isn't he, so you will know for certain if you can trap him
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he do look at me when i called his voice and i think the sound of my voice kept him returning. No he sadly not microchipped but if i could see him really up close I could tell better.
I know not to get my hopes up to high just in case but the shape of the body, albeit slimmer and his back and sides looks exactly the same. All the other tabbies I crossed paths with in this neighbourhood were very friendly and approachable. This cat walks very low down. The couple has already spoken with the cat owners they know on their street and they all say that this is not their cat.
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Oh Miriam just seen this and I have everything that I could possibly cross crossed for you! :wow:
A cat does act differently if it is not used to a situation...Yes he would remember you but he will be so cautious after fending for himself for that amount of time! ;)
Sending positive vibes to help Buddy realise that its his mum who has come for him~~~~~~C'mon Buddy, not long now till you will be safe and sound and back where you belong!!! :Luv: :hug: :hug:
Very best of luck Miriam! :wish:
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this is taken from a thread by pinkbear a while back its a story that I always remember because Tilly was missing very close by for ages but it shows that she did need trapping although settled down at home straight away
- I'm sure pb won't mind me nicking from her thread
On Friday morning, when it was still dark, a small streak of black fur darting across the street up the road, caught my eye. Although I had leafleted the house of the garden it was, I hadn't spoked with the occupant. On returning home that night, I knocked on his door.
The confirmed a small black cat had taken residence in the nearby garden of a vacant property around 2 months ago. But "you won't be able to get near her. I've tried and she just runs..." Well, she isn't his cat, is she!!
I'm happy to report after a short trapping campaign, Tilly was caught at 3am. She was very hungry, a bit scruffy, full of worms but otherwise fine. The whole time she must have been less than 200 yards away but because her escape route had taken her via a door she'd never been through into territory she'd never seen before, she litterally didn't recognise her own front door. Because she'd been so scared, she must have only been coming out in the middle of the night so I hadn't seen her before.
I'd like to thank my employer, Eastonways, for calling me up an begging me to work overtime that day as I never would have come out the door that early.
Anyway... take heart the rest of you. She was gone for 2 months and I'd accepted I'd never see her again but I found her... And knock on those doors because this neighbour bloke was as thick as and I've still got a score to settle there.
Off for a cuddle with my Tilly.
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Hi Miriam :) I've only just seen this and so hope it is your Buddy :hug: he certainly could be showing reluctance because he is cautious.
:wish: for you and Buddy xx
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If only this is Buddy :wish: :crossed:
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Fingers crossed for you miriam :hug: :hug:
They get very spooked being lost and often cant be picked up and boxed like they normally would.
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Hi everyone,
I've managed to sort out a loan of a trap, my friend will help me collect it on Saturday morning as I don't drive.
The couple said they will keep an eye on him and keep feeding him.
i too also really really hope it is him. My biggest clue is that Buddy has a kink in his fur at the top of his tail and this cat has it also, there are also the identical marking pattern on his fur. If I could pick him up I'd know for sure! Buddy didn't like to be picked up at home anyhow, would always run away, only want a cuddle if he came to me, not if I went to him!
Thanks Dawn for reposting Pink Bear's thread, wouldn't it be great if mine ends the same!
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Just seen this and I do hope its Buddy. He would remember you but his attitude to people will be affected by fending for himself for 7 weeks.
Lots of luck :hug: :hug:
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This is sounding so promising :crossed:
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Just caught up with this Miriam - I have everything crossed for you both :hug:
He won't have forgotten you - don't worry :hug:
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OMG PLEASE let this cat be Buddy - fingers, toes and everything else crossed - we could all use some good news at the moment xxx
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Sending positive vibes Miriam for this to be Buddy and for him to go straight into the trap!~~~~~~ :wish:
If he has a favourite food of the smelly fish variety I would use that, also try to conceal the trap with cardboard or whatever to make it look less menacing to him!
Very best of luck! :Luv: :hug:
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Come on in Buddy your friend is waiting for you :hug:
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Hi guys, So I've picked up the trap today and it's not too heavy so I'll be able to carry it around to the garden he is going into, it's only about 1/2 a mile a way. I showed the pictures they sent me to my friend who has met Buddy several times and she says it's definately him in their photos, yippee! So now I am just waiting for the callers to get back in touch with me so I can take the trap over there, they said I could, I think they are out today. Hopefully in the next couple of days it will be convenient for them for me to come back round.
fingers crossed xxxxx
Thank you so much for all the positive vibes, I think they are starting to get through
PS, I'm off to Asda now to get some more packets of his favorite food, hopefully it does the trick!
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:crossed: :wish:
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Ths may be a silly suggestion -but how about putting some branches and leaves over the top of the trap and sides so it disguises it a bit and he may be more inclined to go in it.
Good luck .
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I have everything crossed for you here, I so hope it is going to be Buddy. :hug: And how lovely that people are still looking out for him.
Here's hoping we have some good news!
Karen
x
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Any news?
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I'm invited over tomorrow morning, I got the trap and his food all ready. I dusted out of the cupboard the old wheelie trolley that we used to use before they put suitcases on wheels and the trap just fits on so that should make it easier to get it to the house without my hands falling off!
They said the cat is still coming to their garden and has increased his visits since I was there on Thursday. Maybe looking for me.......that would be nice.
I am so both nervous and excited about what may lay ahead.
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:hug: best of luck for tomorrow I'll be thinking of you
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Fingers crossed for tomorrow ,sending lots of positive vibes that it is Buddy and you get him home safe :hug: :hug:
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I am really hoping its Budddy and you can trap him :wish:
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hope the sunshine has brought him out for you Miriam!!
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Thanks guys. The trap is down in the lady's garden and the lady is home, so now just waiting!
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Positive trapping vibes being sent this way
:crossed:
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Good luck :wish:
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C'mon Buddy, go in the trap so you can go home.
Karen
x
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:wish: :wish: :wish:
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This is getting exciting Miriam, I bet your tum is doing summersaults! Good Luck again! ;) :hug: :hug:
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:crossed: still!
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still waiting for the phonecall.........
If no call tonight I'll take round to the lady in the morning lots of packets of food so there is always fresh smelling food in the trap
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Did you try and conceal the trap with something Miriam? Maybe some of your worn clothing or a fave blanket of his would be good for instance! ;) :hug:
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Good idea, thanks Bazsmum. I did receive the tips to cover the trap with branches/leaves, I just thought I would try one day with it uncovered but his blanket (still unwashed) should be big enough to cover three sides!
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I do hope he takes the bait :hug: :hug:
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me too!
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fingers crossed for you miriam i do hope it is your beloved buddy and he gets in that trap soon!! my thoughts are with you both xx
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Just me being nosey Miriam, hopefully my curiosity will be cured very soon! :wish: :hug: :hug:
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Me being nosey too - the suspense is just tooo much xxx
Still got everything crossed that this is Buddy and he gets his tabby butt into the trap soon xxxx
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the weather is horrible as well - hope he gets hungry soon
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Keep checking here in hope of good news! :wish:
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Hi guys,
Nosey?, I don't understand?
I dropped off a big bag of food today to the couple and even though they are really nice folk, I feel a bit like I am intruding on their life so I'll wait for them to call me. When I saw the cat last week he didn't look at all unhealthy so he might have a few feeding stations. They can't keep the trap down all the time as they have a 1 year old cat of their own who likes to play in the garden.
So all I can do is wait! CP didn't give me a time limit on how long I could borrow the trap for so that's one good thing.
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Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr it really needs to be down all the time and fully primed with food so he gets used to it..............why cant they just help rather than making life difficult........sorry I would be on the phone all the time!
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I suppose they are worried their cat will be trapped - though if it were it would probably only be the once
what about the neighbours, Miriam? he won't be confining himself to the one garden, so the trap would be just as likely to catch him in a neighbouring garden, where perhaps there are no other cats
I know I would be quite happy to put a cat trap in my garden for someone, as long as that someone came as soon as the cat was caught - might be worth asking
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Hi Miriam - Me nosey because I keep checking and checking this thread hoping for good news Hun xxx
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the couple have spoken with their neighbours to keep an eye out. I just don't want to push my luck as I relying on the kindness of strangers. They are really nice folk and have been incredibly helpfull. They are home most of the time so that is a good thing
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Topping up those positive vibes for the safe return of Buddy, hope you manage to get him today :hug: :hug:
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Topping up those positive vibes for the safe return of Buddy, hope you manage to get him today :hug: :hug:
and from me too :hug:
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and at the end of the day, this couple held on to my flyer for 7 weeks, they didn't have to do that. I saw so many of my flyers in people's recycling bins, even as litter in the street (all were completely pushed through letter boxes). Off the 500 or so I posted, this one reached a good home. some of my posters were ripped down within a couple of hours of going up.
So even though I have hit another frustrating pillar in my search for Buddy, I am very lucky to have some help from this people. Most people would not have bothered.
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sounds like they are on your side - still keeping fingers crossed for you
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May be nice to get them some flowers or wine or something as they seem lovely people.
Topping up the vibes for Buddy to show up again.
Karen
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Hi Miriam - Me nosey because I keep checking and checking this thread hoping for good news Hun xxx
My reason for being nosey also! :sneaky: :hug:
Still thinking of you both and sending out those positive vibes~~~~~~ :wish:
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Hoping Buddy comes home soon :hug:
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No one is nosey!, I am touched by everyone thinking about our little saga!
I got an e-mail tonight and they said when buddy came to their garden today, they didn't have the trap down!, so hopefully that will encourage them to leave it down more often!
They said their own cat has got caught in it twice so I joked to them that at least we know it works!
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sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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No one is nosey!, I am touched by everyone thinking about our little saga!
To someone else who is not "cat wise" this may seem like a little saga Miriam, to us this is your life and a very epic tale....I want the epilogue to begin (Is that the last part, the sum up etc? :-:)
I think you may have a clue what I mean.... :shy: :Luv: :hug: :hug:
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To someone else who is not "cat wise" this may seem like a little saga Miriam, to us this is your life and a very epic tale....I want the epilogue to begin (Is that the last part, the sum up etc? :-:)
I think you may have a clue what I mean.... :shy: :Luv: :hug: :hug:
I want to be the mod who alters the thread title :Luv:
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No me me me :rofl:
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If you can get them to keep their cat in at night and set the trap last thing at night and hopefuklly she will go in at night with the smell of fishy food - worked a charm for us last week I now have a neutered tom - Sam and a pregnant black girl Indie
We always set our traps at night - we had to re trap 30 of ours after we moved so kknow how frustrating it can be - our closest neighbour - we share a track used to check the traps for their cats and then reset for us with food - they are very good neighbours!
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So frustrating but it must surely be only a matter of time.
Would the area be somewhere you would feel safe in at night - just wondering if there was anyone you could go out with at night, once it has quietened down, to see whether he is more responsive to your voice at night.
:hug:
Karen
x
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Just popped in to top up the positive homing vibes for Buddy, you must be so frustrated but im sure you will win in the end :hug: :hug:
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:hug: Any news yet Miriam?
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nope, no news yet!
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OK, so I got a call this morning, about 10.00am, 'He's in the trap, he's in the trap!'. I go round there and Buddy is in the trap!. We slide his blanket into the trap and he smells the blanket, stops scrambling and lays down on to the blanket. The very kind couple then drive me, Buddy and the trap back to my house.
So Buddy is now home. He has had something to eat and a nap but I think he is very, very traumatised. He earlier spoke to me and it is his voice and he has lost about 1/2 his body weight but otherwise physically looks OK. I am giving him all the space he needs. His breathing is normal but I think he may have some physiological damage. I'm quietly singing the songs I would sing to him normally, he did walk back into the room to see me but then the phone rang and he jumped and ran back to the bathroom.
I guess it can be possible for a cat to be traumatised after surviving in a neighbourhood they didn't know, what with all the thunder storms of late. He has been missing for a total of 58 days. I think I am a shell shocked myself at the mo with him actually being back home
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Thats the most fantastic news :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:
It will take him some time to come round as he has been away so long, but definately don''t let him out again for a long while .
Have you got any feliway diffusers to plug in ?
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:omg: :omg: :omg: :omg:
This is fantastic news, it has made my day - no scrap that it has made my week :wow: :wow: :wow:
It will take him a while to settle back in, I'd definitely second the Feliway diffuser - they're cheaper online but I think he'd benefit from one ASAP so you can get them from Pets at Home. I know a lot of the rescues have great success with rescue remedy too (as have I), either a few drops in the water or on the outsides of his ears.
Am absolutely over the moon for you Miriam :hug:
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Oh that's excellent news!!
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What's a feliway diffuser?
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It's like a plug in which is calming for cats.
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:dance: :dance: :dance: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :dance: :dance: :dance: :Flowers: :Flowers: :Flowers: :cuddle: :cuddle: :cuddle: :star1: :star1: :star1:
MIRIAM!!!!!
I am in tears of joy here, I am soooooooooo pleased that you and Buddy have been reunited! This is amazing!!!!
Now this can join all of the other "Stories of Hope"!!!
:welcome: back Buddy....If you knew how much your meowmy missed you, but then you do as Im sure you missed her just as much back!!! :hug:
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It's basically calming pheromones for cats - I have had great success with it with Lu who can be very twitchy and overly sensitive. Can't think of anywhere on the high street so to speak that would sell them apart from Pets at Home.
http://www.petsathome.com/find/keyword-is-feliway/product-is-21222
Would you allow me the honour of changing the title to 'home safe'? :)
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It's basically calming pheromones for cats - I have had great success with it with Lu who can be very twitchy and overly sensitive. Can't think of anywhere on the high street so to speak that would sell them apart from Pets at Home.
http://www.petsathome.com/find/keyword-is-feliway/product-is-21222
Would you allow me the honour of changing the title to 'home safe'? :)
Would the vets not stock them cheaper than that Helen? :sneaky:
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Jolleys sell them too I think.
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It's basically calming pheromones for cats - I have had great success with it with Lu who can be very twitchy and overly sensitive. Can't think of anywhere on the high street so to speak that would sell them apart from Pets at Home.
http://www.petsathome.com/find/keyword-is-feliway/product-is-21222
Would you allow me the honour of changing the title to 'home safe'? :)
Would the vets not stock them cheaper than that Helen? :sneaky:
They're £22 online so Vet prices would prob be the same/more than PAH but there's also finding a vet that's open on Saturdays! From personal experience of knowing how well it works I'd say it's definitely worth £30 :)
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You could also try ebay for them .Had a quick look and they about £22 posted.
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Would love to see a pic of the boy himself when he's settled back in Miriam :)
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These Feliway usually take about a week to start working Miriam so for the now I would just concentrate of him (as if you wouldnt be lol!) and you and the love you lost now the love thats returned! (yes I know Im away with the pixies lol!) ;D ;D ;D
He is an indoor cat is he not? I cant remember but! Even if he just goes out in your garden then unless it is catproofed I would also keep him in for at least 2 weeks to re-establish where his home is! ;) :hug:
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Would love to see a pic of the boy himself when he's settled back in Miriam :)
Yes we need to see the clever boy! Do you reckon the location he was found could of been on the way back to yours from the vets? (me being curious!) :shify: :hug:
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just ordered the diffuser on Jolleys for £21. Buddy was an outdoor cat but I am DEFINETLY keeping him in for a few weeks, will be a bit tricky as I live in a studio flat and one of the kitchen walls is pretty much the back door but I am not taking any risks! He has gone back to sleep now so I am just leaving him be.
Can he stay traumatised for quite along time, I don't want to upset him more than he already is?
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No! Unless of course he had been to hell and back which we now know was not the case! I'd give him a week tops considering the situation, cats are very clever and do have memories once put back into a situation....He will probably be back to normal in a couple of days! ;) :hug:
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You keep looking at him in disbelief! Imagine the feeling your gonna get when you wake up in the morning and see him! ;D :hug:
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Oh that is fabulous, fabulous news :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :drink: :drink: :drink: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:
Miriam, I am over the moon for you both, I really am!
Your presence, soothing music, familiar surroundings and some good food will soon calm Buddy down, I'm sure :hug:
Oh this is so good :wow:
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BRILLIANT NEWS ;D ;D ;D
:dance: :dance: :dance: :cheer: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :cheer: :dance: :dance: :dance:
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I'm absolutely thrilled for you, fantastic news.
:cheer: :cheer: :cheer: :cheer:
I'm sure he'll settle back in again very quickly.
Karen
x
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Wonderful news.
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Thats really great news Miriam
:welcome: Buddy xx
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:wow: that's made my day, I am so pleased :hug:
Buddy is bound to feel quite stressed right now but he will settle down soon I'm sure xx
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Wonderful news!
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Oh Miriam I am so happy that Buddy is back home. If he has been living on his wits for a the past 58 days he will be jumpy, nervous and stressed out ... poor baby. I'm sure after a good sleep and food he will realise he is back home and safe with his mummy again. As he has lost weight it's probably best to feed little and often and it's probably a good idea to get him a vet check up. He'll probably need a worming pill and a flea treatment as well if he's been living rough . But for now lots of rest, relaxation and cuddles from his mummy are what's needed.
Welcome home Buddy xxx
:hug: :hug: :hug:
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Whoo hooo some good news for a change, so pleased for you ;D
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:yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy:
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Miriam im so pleased for you and buddy, your hardwork paid off and you have him back ;D
He will be upset for a while but should soon get back to his routine again, as he has lost weight it would be best to feed him small meals until he gets used to regular food again, id also phone the vet and see if they want to check him over :hug:
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This is stunning news and am sure he will settle vey soon, he needs lots of TLC now :hug: :hug:
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Brilliant news - I am sure he will be back to his old self in next to no time. Give him a big cuddle :hug:
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Fantastic Buddy is back home :Luv:
:hug: xxx
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OMG!!!!!!!!!!! :cheer: :yayyy: :attention: :ooops: I am absolutely delighted for you :wow: :wow: :wow:
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Thanks everyone.
buddy has spend the day in the bathroom on the counter and hasn't budged, even when I had to pop out. Just checked on him and he has now moved to the bath but he declined the food I tried to hand feed him. He is so nervous but hopefully he will soon remember that this is home.
I hope to take him to the vet next week, as that is where his saga began, I don't wan't to rush him, just take it easy for a few days.
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I would'nt rush him either! Just remember to take it slowly with building his meals/water back up......Enjoy! ;D :hug: :hug:
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I have taken a peek at this thread every day and it's wonderful to read that your Buddy has returned.
My handsome little boy Ted has been missing now for 5 weeks, each day he doesn't return my hope fades a little more - this story now gives me some hope that he is out there close by and we will soon be reunited.
You must be over the moon.
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Oh Miriam this is FANBLOODYTASTIC news - I cant tell you how pleased I am for you and Buddy xxx
:yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy: :yayyy:
:yesss: :yesss: :yesss: :yesss: :yesss: :Flowers:
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I have taken a peek at this thread every day and it's wonderful to read that your Buddy has returned.
My handsome little boy Ted has been missing now for 5 weeks, each day he doesn't return my hope fades a little more - this story now gives me some hope that he is out there close by and we will soon be reunited.
You must be over the moon.
Hi Dawn and :welcome: to Purrs, Sorry to hear your furbabe is missing....Maybe do a thread in this section on your own story...you never know hun! ;) :Luv: :hug:
Positive vibes for your furbabes safe return..... :hug:
Hope all is okay at your end Miriam! :Luv: :hug:
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How is Buddy doing today?
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Can't believe I missed this - you can sleep at night at last Miriam :)
Great news - I am sure he will calm down. Might be an idea to leave a worn T-shirt where he sleeps to calm him down.
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what great news, I hope he is a little more settled now
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Hi everyone,
Buddy spent most of the day under the bed yesterday but in the evening he came out to use the litter tray and sat on the carpet for a while. Every single little sound from the street made him jump, especially the cars and after a while he went back under the bed. On Saturday night, when i turned the lights out for bed, he went hysterical so i left a lamp on all night and he calmed down, also left the light on last night and will continue to so until he feels more relaxed.
Funny, he still was choosy about which food he wants to eat, even though he's so thin!
Slowly, very slowly he will settle back down I believe, his eyes don't look so scared and he does his 'blink' responses when i talk calmly to him.
Dawn, I really hope your little boy Ted comes home soon. It's strange, the week I was beginning to get used to never seeing him again is the week he returned. I hope the people in your neighbourhood have been as kind as the ones who helped me, this morning I went out and took down the lost posters and deliver thankyou cards to everyone who helped me.
Make sure you still got the posters up as one day, the right person will see them.
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If you hav'nt done already Miriam, I would pop a radio on (some gentle music) for him will actually help to calm his nerves.... ;)
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It sounds like he had a hard life out there and was scared every minute, so reckon its gonna take a whiile for him to settle. I am sure he lost a lot of sleep too cos was on his guard all the time.
Its a pity he cant tell you about what happened and am sure with loads of TLC he will gradually come round but in his head will always be that terrible 58 days when he had to look after himself and was so frightened.
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Thanks Miriam, posters are still up in the neighbourhood and my neighbours are all on the case - I miss him so much and worry what he might be going through, still refer to him as present not past. I can't help feeling guilty that I let this happen to him.
Give Buddy lots of love and tlc - he deserves it.
Thanks
Dawn
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Great to hear that Buddy is back with you, Miriam.
Fingers crossed for Dawn's furbabe.
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How's Buddy today Miriam?
Sending positive vibes for Ted's safe return Dawn :hug:
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Congratulations on your reunification. Just thought I'd mention that for traumatized cats, I ve found that the Feliway diffuser to be a great calmer. You can get it from your vet. Skullcap&valerian organic tablets can help too, though I prefer the diffuser by far, as it's completely unobtrusive. Of course, nothing can replace TLC, applied liberally all over!
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Hi guys,
Thanks for your message.
Poor Buddy is still very petrified and hide 99% of the time, currently he is hidden so deeply i need a torch to find him, I put his food near him and he uses the litter tray when I am asleep or at work. It's heart breaking how crushed he is, I think he is still in survival mode and will take him a very long time to realise that he is now safe again.
I've got the diffuser plugged in ( arrived today) and left the light on and the radio on when I went to work and when I am home I sing to him and I leave a light on at night so the house is never in darkness.
I spoke with a local lady today who told me her cat once went missing for 6 weeks and 3 years on, her cat never regained her confidence or feels truly safe. I guess some mental scar are beyond repair.
all I can do is reassurance him and hopefully he will realise that he doesn't have to be scared anymore.
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My heart goes out to poor Buddy and guess its gonna take a long time for him to recover :hug: :hug: :hug:
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Poor Buddy :care: I'm sure the Feliway will help, it works wonders on Lu although he has never been through what Buddy has :hug: Time and lots of TLC will be needed too :hug:
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Poor Buddy , god knows what he has been through :'( .
Hopefully with all your love and reassurance he will eventually realise he is safe at home with you. :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
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Hopefully time, lots of love and reassurance will help to heal some of the scars left from his dreadful experiences :hug: :hug:
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Poor boy, it must be upsetting for you to see him like this Miriam, which I guess could be because he was lost in an unknown area and it has really spooked him out but you can give him all your love and reassurance and keep him safe and sound now and in time his confidence will return. :hug:
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sounds like you are doing everything you can - hopefully the feliway will kick in soon, otherwise there are serenum (sp?) drops you can add to food
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Poor little Buddy. Your vet may be able to offer some short term medication for him?
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I have just read this thread from start to finish and i'm sobbing my heart out with dispare for the missing cat then tears of joy for his return. I have lost a few cats over the years. First was a brother and sister who went missing at the same time but returned 2 weeks later at the same time. They were very dirty and very thin but otherwise ok. The second time was a tabby male who jumped out my first floor flat window and was missing for 6 weeks. I went outside early hours one morning and there he was so i think he was hiding during the day. the third and last time was a 6 month old kitten who went missing and never came back. We eventually moved so i'll never know if she ever returned.
To those who have lost a cat, do as this lady has done and never give up hope of them ever coming home.
Big Purrrs & Hugz. to all. :hug:
Shelly.
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The mental scars are probably there for life, like wih Misa and Sasa but they will fade in time........I dont believe meds will help, its now all TLC and home comforts and getting used to being loved again :hug: :hug:
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Sorry to hear that Buddy is more traumatised than first thought.....I do hope something can be sorted soon, Feliway takes aprox a week to start working so maybe the Serene UM would be a good idea...The drops can easily be added to his food and they are quick acting, just till the Feliway kicks in! ;) :Luv: :hug:
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Not recommending to buy using this link as such but you may want to give Zylkene a try? Our Dinah is currently on it and doesn't object to the taste in the least. She was peeing on the duvets and generally hissing at our other 5 cats. She has it in the morning and it does seem to relax her during the day but she is very active at night so difficult to tell for sure. I recently got 30 capsules for just over £12 online so worth a try.
http://www.buyzylkene.co.uk/
So sorry that you and Buddy are having to go through this :hug:
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Hi Miriam.. so happy to hear Buddy came home.. what a long time he was away for.
One of our cats recently went missing but only for a couple of days and we were so sad, I can only imagine what you must have been through all this time.
Friends of mine have used Bush Flower Essences for their cats which are pet friendly and have calming properties and I believe there are some that can help cats who have been traumatised and for change etc.
I realise this sort of approach is not for everyone, but thought I would mention it, just in case it may be helpful.
Am sure Buddy will feel better anyway with your love and attention and in time will be more himself
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Hi Amber, could it have been Bach? I know people do use rescue remedy
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Bach Flower and rescue remedy is great, but there are also Australian Bush Flower Remedies.. ausflowers.com is the website
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Noone has mentioned the feliway spray version, which can be sprayed around where Buddy is hiding. The advantage being, it starts to work a whole lot quicker. I used a combination of this, the diffuser and skullcap/valerian,which also comes in various forms, with Fifi before, with good results. Fifi, now missing, was semi-feral when she arrived and went into a similar panick mode to Buddies, when she had to be forced to the vet's. Iknow how it hurts to watch the pain your loved one is in, but patience/time is the real healer and it's worth keeping in mind, that for him at least the worst is over.
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We have our latest trapee Indie on Zylkene and she is a hissy poppet with his but a lashing tiger without it so she will be on it for a couple of weeks till she is speyed
I have to say there is a naturel tablet from the health food shop called Margicol which friends have used on ferals - I have 3 of hers and they are the most chilled out of our lot of ferals - not on it now but they are now all appproachable and have been to the vet - unlike Ace and Blue who was last there for the chop 11 months ago!
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Thanks for all the wonderful tips guys.
Buddy is still under the sofa. Sometimes when it is quite and he thinks I'm not there, he comes out to eat, realises I am there and either runs back under the sofa (It's against a wall) or he'll check over at me that I haven't moved between each bite. I lay on my front on the floor to look at him under the sofa but not for to long as I don't want to scare him, just long enough to let him know I am here and to tell him he doesn't need to feel scared anymore
On Saturday I'll look for those rescue remedy stuff. I don't want to put him on medication as I think he has enough to deal with at the mo.
One thing for sure, after being catless for 2 months, my home once again has the cat smell (!) so hopefully he will find some comfort there!.
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Zylkene is easy just pop the tablet contents on any wet food or nice tuna and they eat the lot!
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Hope all went okay at your end this weekend Miriam, did you manage to get him anything to help calm his nerves? :Luv: :hug:
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Such a sad story, Miriam, but hopefully Buddy will soon realise he's home and safe now. Good luck to you both.
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Buddy is still in 'stray mode', hiding, fearful of outside sounds, only eating & littertraying when I am out of eye sight. i went to Boots yesterday and I found the Bach's rescue remedy but it said that it has to be ingested and I am worried that if I put anything on his food that he won't eat it. His weight gain has not been much this past week even when somedays he can eat as much as 5 packets.
i also got a book from the library called 'Cat Counsellor' by Vicky Hall, in the book, she advises not to give direct eye contact with a 'nervous/timid' cat. "Cats who won't be picked up and whose response to approaches from humans is fuelled by adrenalin; either they escape as far away as possible, freeze or fight with teeth and claw with or without prior warning' She then goes on to give lots of examples of these kinds of cats.
so I'm not sure if I should not look at Buddy so he doesn't feel like he is being watched or of I should look at him so that he knows that I know that he is there to reassure him that he is not alone!
All so confusing!
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Try not to let him see you giving him direct eye contact... In the wild this indicates confrontation! If he does catch you then blink slowly and turn your head away from him! :hug: :hug:
Isnt it strange the way they work... So sorry that its being a total mare for you both at the mo, I still have high hope's of him coming through this Miriam... Just that blasted waiting game! :Luv: :hug: :hug:
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I think for now, Miriam, you will have to forget about the 'old' Buddy and concentrate on the 'new' Buddy
start from scratch as if he was a stray you had just found by chance, and treat him accordingly, and hopefully he will gradually change back into the cat he once was
it must be very difficult for you, but ultimately I suspect the rewards will outweigh all the difficulties you are currently experiencing :hug:
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Thanks for the tips guys, they sure are funny little things!
To be honest, it's not to upsetting because at least now I KNOW where he is!, under the sofa is better than out on the streets. I know 'Buddy' is in there somewhere and one day he will realise he is now safe. And I have great comfort in knowing that I DID find him and bring him home, even though he is not completely in one piece. Tonight's attempt is a slice of buttered bread and I know he cannot resist a little bit of butter!
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Miriam Bachs Rescue remedy can be added to drinking wter (just add a few drops) or the best thing is to rub a little bit on the backs of their ears ... assuming of course you are able to get close to him.
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Thanks Sam, tricky because a) I can't get anywhere near him and b) he preferred his water in the form of puddles. If I can get close to him, I will definitely try the rubbung on the ears, thanks.
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Does he like cat milk? You could put a few drops in a small amount of cat milk, he'd be guaranteed to drink it that way. When I used it with Lu he really didn't like me rubbing it on his ears (although it did work) so the milk route could be a winner if he likes it.
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With the ferals outside if they look fearful when I approach I keep my head turned the opposite way but talk gently and friendly towards them, most of them will let me get very close now.
Miriam, was Buddy always a bit of a scaredy cat or was he a cuddle puss?
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I think trigger is right and you start off like he is a new cat. His experience outside for so long must have traumatized him so badly and only lots of time and TLC will bring him back but it must be done at his time, not yours.
I agree its wonderful you now know where he is and that he is at last safe again.
Never look at him directly, well not until he comes round again.
Misa spent a few weeks under the recliner when he first came here and even now 4 years on, he is not a people cat and jumps at the slightest noise behind him and hides if the doorbell rings.
Its so sad that cats retain this fear and I have two that do and one I still cant touch but I know that they are safe and warm, have food and nobody will hurt them and at least they know they are safe in the house and can come in when ever they want.
I am sure that Buddy will slowly come to trust you again but be prepared for a long patient wait and dont push him cos I think that will just make it take longer :hug: :hug:
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Its wonderful news that he's home.
I think time will be a great healer in this case. My experience with really timid cats showed that it did take quite a long time for them to fully settle, but lots of time, love and care will be rewarded.
when you visit where he is sit on the floor and become as small as you can and gently talk to him. If he looks at you blink you're eyes slowly closed and open. Then yawn and look away. They see yawning as a reassurance that you are not intent on doing any harm. Keep visiting regularly and doing this and sometimes leave treats (prawns work well in these cases).
Leaving a radio on quietly when you are not around will provide reassurance and assist in getting him used to sounds in the home again.
He will still smell of the outside and is yet to Acquire the "clan" scent. He will feel more secure when that scent becomes familiar to him.
Best of luck
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Starting doing the eye diversion and blinking, when i look away, he carry's on eating rather than running away again. And I think the felway diffuser is helping as I had a powercut yesterday for a few hours and when i was out, he went to the toilet in the bath. Since it is back on, he is using his litter tray as normal.
Don't worry, I would never rush Buddy, everything is at his pace.
Buddy previously would run away and hide from all humans except me and my mother who had him as a kitten so I guess he has always had a 'scardey cat' element in his personality.
Helen - Buddy never liked milk so sadly I can't out the Bachs in there.
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Glad to hear that some progress is occurring, a lot of this comes down to psychology, some of it sounds nuts... But believe me it all works! ;) :Luv: :hug:
Well Done Miriam! :wow:
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good news that he is improving :hug:
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Buddy previously would run away and hide from all humans except me and my mother who had him as a kitten so I guess he has always had a 'scardey cat' element in his personality.
I guessed so Miriam, I am sure you will get your old Buddy back - just may take time :hug:
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Buddy previously would run away and hide from all humans except me and my mother who had him as a kitten so I guess he has always had a 'scardey cat' element in his personality.
I guessed so Miriam, I am sure you will get your old Buddy back - just may take time :hug:
Ah, then that explains so much. I agree with Janey and the others - you'll get there :hug:.
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Hope Buddy is still improving Miriam.
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Buddy has popped out from under the sofa the past two morning and watched me in the kitchen for a few minutes, I keep talking to him without looking directly at him but if I try to go anywhere near him, off he runs back under the sofa but sitting on the carpet the same time I am in view is a big step.
tomorrow I am going to try the 'prawns in hand' method to see if he will eat from my hand.
Baby steps.
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I think its a bit early for the prawns in hand yet and would try just putting them in a dish and then stand about 3 ft away. You keep moving the dish slowely closer to you until you until he is eating with the dish at your feet and then its time for prawns in hand ;D
It can take a few weeks to get them to do this and slowly slowly is best. You dont move the dish closer to you until he has mastered each step and you may find you need to be 6 foot away to start with.
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Thanks Gill, I'll try it that way.
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Aah, when i was out today, little Buddy tried to get out to the sunshine so much he bought down a net curtain, poor little mite, it has to be stuffy under the sofa where he lives when I am home and awake.
and he didn't like the prawns I got him!, I think I'll have more luck with tins of tuna!
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Poor little man :hug:
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It really is such a shame when they are so traumatised but he will come round time and love are the best medicine :hug:
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Poor Buddy! :( Sending calming vibes his direction~~~~~Thinking of you both! :Luv: :hug:
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I've also ordered 2 more months of felway diffuser and on recommendations on another thread, best cat oko litter instead of the supermarket one I've been using and changing everyday. When your used to your cat using the outside at their loo, you don't realise how smelly it can be!
but I'd bend over backwards to do anything to help him.
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:hug: Ahhh bless him ... I'm sure he will thank you for it in the end Miriam.
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that's a coincidence - I've just ordered a supply of the self-same litter for Tosker, who prefers the tray in the kitchen to the three outdoor soil beds in the patio, and the rest of my garden, not to mention the neighbours' gardens
he even climbs up the fence from the outside, jumps down into the enclosure, comes into the kitchen, wees in the tray, goes back out and climbs the fence again :Crazy:
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My Blackie went AWOL last week and the first thing he did when he got back in was a big poo in the litter tray.... It did make me notice how much he had changed... From feral to domesticated "not quite" but getting there! ;)
Its a long road but you have ammunition which is patience and tons of it! :Luv: :hug: :hug:
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perhaps they think we like having big smelly poos in the house, and leave them for us when they have no dead critters to offer up :rofl:
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especially when the smell can literrally wake you from your sleep! :rofl:
aah, I've been home a lot today and he walked around a little bit. but on one of his appearance from the bottom of the sofa ( I was sitting on the edge of the sofa), he made me jump (!) which caused him to skid on his legs and panic back under the sofa, oops, trying to gain forgiveness with a tin of tuna, not working yet but hopefully soon
Jolleys is really good with their next day delivery service, reckon I'm gonna become a regular customer, beats breaking your back carrying litter home from the supermarket!
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Oko is pretty good for smells (although a couple of mine are a bit lax with the covering up)! it tracks a bit but I haven't found anything better so stick with it
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How's Buddy doing, Miriam?
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Hi Shirley, thanks for asking.
Little Buddy is still under the sofa bless him, on the odd occasion i see him, he still looks scared. I have created a little 'home within a home' for him with a little bed with soft blankets inside a cardboard box, a scratching post with a seat at the top which I put treats on the base to attractive him (he eats the treats!). He eats when I am asleep or out so there is always fresh food for him and his litter fresh each day. I talk to him all the time. I leave a light on all night so he can see where everything is. The felway diffuser is very close to his hiding place. I spoke to a vet and they said it can literally take him months to settle back in. He changed his hiding place which is giving him more room, now in between the sofa and the bookcase but still hidden. I have faith that one day he will realise that he is safe again.
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Yes I think your vet is right and its good he has moved where he is hiding cos it shows that he has a little confidence to change things around to suit him.
I think he needs a number of hiding places around the room where he believes that he is hiden from view.
He will come round slowly slowly :hug: :hug:
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if only we knew what was going on in their heads :(
I wonder about leaving the light on overnight, though, Miriam - cats like the dark, and often find it relaxing
he would have no problem finding his way around in the dark
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Slowly does it... I like the sound of the hidey hole you have made for him Miriam its giving him more space to feel secure in and relax! ;)
Sounds daft but do you think he would remember his pal? I wonder how he would react to seeing him again! (thats if his pal is the sort to come indoors of course) :sneaky: :hug: :hug:
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It does sound like it may a while Miriam it really makes you wonder why they change so much. I think though that I would probably turn the light off or do as you did before this happened as I don't think that Buddy would see the light on in the same way we would. I think cats quite like the dark and I would, try and keep things (apart from letting him come round at his pace of course) pretty much the way they would be if that makes sense :hug:
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Poor baby, what on earth could have happened 'outside' to make him so nervous of the one who loves him? I really hope he starts to feel much better very soon, it must be heartbreaking for you x
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It's just a little corner lamp that provides more of a glow then a spotlight, his hiding place is pretty much in the dark. The last time I switched it off he went crazy, trying to run out of a closed window. I'll try it again tonight to see if he is OK with it. I can still hear him walking about whilst I'm in bed which I like!
His 'girlfriend', a sweet little tortoiseshell has come to the garden a few times, maybe she can smell him through the window!. she never came in the home before so I don't think she would now but i tell Buddy his girlfriend is looking for him!
Next to the road Buddy went missing is a small, fairly anti-social housing estate and whilst Buddy was missing, there were reports of some of the residents being cruel to animals in the neighbourhood, throwing objects at them etc. I don't know if Buddy experienced any of these attacks but if he did, it could explain his current fear of humans.
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you sound like you are doing everything right Miriam, he will come round I'm sure - not south acton estate by any chance??
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It's just a little corner lamp that provides more of a glow then a spotlight, his hiding place is pretty much in the dark. The last time I switched it off he went crazy, trying to run out of a closed window. I'll try it again tonight to see if he is OK with it. I can still hear him walking about whilst I'm in bed which I like!
His 'girlfriend', a sweet little tortoiseshell has come to the garden a few times, maybe she can smell him through the window!. she never came in the home before so I don't think she would now but i tell Buddy his girlfriend is looking for him!
Next to the road Buddy went missing is a small, fairly anti-social housing estate and whilst Buddy was missing, there were reports of some of the residents being cruel to animals in the neighbourhood, throwing objects at them etc. I don't know if Buddy experienced any of these attacks but if he did, it could explain his current fear of humans.
If Buddy seems distressed with the lamp turned off then in that case I would leave it on :hug:
terrible about the attacks and it does sound a coincidence
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Not South Acton estate, THANK GOD!, they throw fridges from the balconies on to the police there!. It's the friary estate which is fairly small but not a place you want to enter if you don't have to. I hated it when my searching took me in there!
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glad to hear it! I was worried for you!
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I would definately leave the light on and I have a cat light on everynight till 0500 in utility room and it used to be on all night when I was in London too for Kocka.
The landing light also goes on as soon as it goes dark and if I forget I have angry cats howling or visiting me to tell me about it.
I would do absolutely nothing to upset the balance he has now. let him lead and you follow :hug:
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thanks Gill, i'll leave it on then as advised.
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Hi guys,
The past two nights, in the middle of the night, Buddy has made a 'trembling crying' sound for a couple of mins and then goes silent again. He is still eating ok and using the litter tray ok. I looked up some info and it advises that the cry could either be medical or behavioural connected. It is virtually impossible to get him to the vets to have a check up, do you think I should see if a vet can do a home visit? Also that for a cat behaviourist to see him, they have to be on referral from a vet. 'm not sure what to do. Any advice please? Thanks, Miriam
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I would go for Vet check at home if I were you
Leave behaviourist until after the Vet check
good luck :hug:
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So sorry that Buddy is finding hard getting over the experience. You may find it difficult to find a vet tjhat does home visits, that's the case where I live anyway. You're right though, it sounds necessary at this poin, so if you ask around you might find a helpful vet. If not, because he's still unhappy after this long, it may be worth 'biting the bullet' and coaxing him into a carrier... as a last option.
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I would get a vet to check Buddy over Miriam and take it from there if you can't get hold of him you may need to use a trap. You never know there could be something wrong healthwise that's causing his behaviour :hug:
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unless it's an emergency, I woud start by putting an open carrier, with treats inside, somewhere he will find it and hopefully see it as a safe place to hide in
you might even be able to shut him in it
incidentally, Tosker used to cry piteously in the house, and still does a bit, but it is getting less - because the other cats ignore him and he won't come to me, I think he was lonely
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Thanks guys. I read that it could be that he is lonely, he has no contact for a month now, it is quite distressing/heartbreaking to hear as all I want to do is help him. I don't have the radio on at night as I wouldn't sleep myself as I'd be singing along to it.(!)
If he cries again tonight, I'll call my vet in the morning to find out what my local options are. I'm just so worried about trying to get him into his carrier, if it would be far too traumatic for him, I don't want to make him feels worse then he already does.
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Miriam when he cries have you tried calling him ... he may be lonely and by you calling him to you it will reassure him that you are still in the house. You never know he may come to you ;)
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He did one random cry last week and I called him then and he stopped so that makes sense Sam, thanks.
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Franta will sit by my bed and cry during the night and he also goes out on the landing too. If I call his name he usually stops until the next time and when he is by the bed its like he is asking permission to come and lie on the pillow, so he gets up after he has been invited.
Franta shouldnt be lonely but he does crave attention on his terms maybe Buddy is now wanting to get closer to you but is still too scared.
I think Triggers idea ia a good one and if you put a towel over the carrier and door so he cant see what it is.......yes I know he will know LOL..........but then with a rug inside it may become a place he feels safe and then that will help you too :hug: :hug:
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Aw bless him.... It must be so frustrating not being able to help him out like you want to! I wish you much luck with whichever way you have him see the vet, whether at home or at the practice! :Luv: :hug:
Wish his little friend would come inside to reassure him! :hug:
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so at 1.13 am I wake to a little cry sounds, taking the advice, I talk and sing gently to him and he stops. I could sense that he had come out and was by the side of my bed but I didn't know if I can look at him when he does this or not so I didn't look directly at him. He cried again at 4.00 am and I put the radio on whilst talking to him and he stopped. There was another cat outside the window that was meowing so much, it sounded like he was telling an entire story!
So I reckon this is 'lonely cry' and I can hold off for the vets for a while thankfully. The cry doesn't sound like a 'pain cry', more like a sad cry and he does seem to react to my talking to him.
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Sounds like little steps are working - we have a couple who talk and yowl - all ex feral and they seem to do it mostly in the middle of the night we just reaassure them they are safe and it seems to stop
I would just keep doing what you are doing as it seems to be working for you both - time and love is the best medicine :hug:
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am glad you have ruled out a vet visit for the time being
I do think the secret in continuing Buddy's progress is to have as long a period as possible in which nothing directly threatens him - he will then trust that whatever is going on in the flat is nothing to do with him
that will make him a happier cat as well as encouraging him to explore more and more
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Hi Miriam,
i haven't been around on here for a while and was so completely thrilled to read that buddy was home! I actually cried when i read back through your thread. I'm so happy for you. It's such a shame that he's been left traumatised by going missing but I'm sure he'll gradually improve. it sounds like you're doing everything right and with all that love and patience from you he's bound to get better! he's such a little survivor to have managed on his own for so long. I'm sure he'll get through this period of re-adjustment too. it must be so hard because you just want your happy boy back. Time and lots of love will get him through xx
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Miriam when he cries have you tried calling him ... he may be lonely and by you calling him to you it will reassure him that you are still in the house. You never know he may come to you ;)
That is what we do with Alice - she has taken to crying really loudly but as soon as I appear, it turns to a normal miow - she is a little attention-seeking madam :evillaugh: - she even does it if she realises we are engrossed in a film or something. She never used to do it but I do think it is to seek reassurance. Oddly she never did it when she was shut up in the attic alone. It is a blood-curdling yowl but I know there is nothing wrong :Crazy:
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Thanks everyone, I think he is starting to take small steps as earlier he was looking at me in the bath!, so maybe he is starting to realise this weird human person is not too bad!
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every little step is wonderful ;D
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You just keep plodding on being your cheery singing self as it does sound as though the penny may have started to drop with him.... Hope so! :hug: :hug:
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They may be little steps but its a tremendous progress :wow: so keep up the good vibes your getting there :hug: :hug:
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This is really weird and such a coincedence relevant to this.... Blackie my ex feral has started to call out to.... I have heard this for quite some time and thought it was one of the others! :shocked:
I only found out it was him today when he was at the bottom of the stairs doing it.... he stopped and brrrr'd as soon as Gizzy (his pal) came! :Luv2:
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Hi Miriam,
I only just saw this as I've not checked in for a while (I sort of felt guilty after Mia came back and Buddy was still missing). I'm absolutely thrilled you found him, just read the last month or so of the saga....obviously taking a while to settle back in but I'm sure you'll sort it out eventually in time. I've only just been able to let Mia out unsupervised as they cut the dreaded wheat a couple of weeks ago - since then she's been off hunting shrews which Ted her brother eats - up to 7 in a weekend.
I've already had to worm them all as a result.
Every time I let her out I kiss her and say goodbye just in case its the last time i see her but she loves it so much I can't keep her in she cries for hours to get out when I do lock her in the house. I'm just about ok now when she's out and about as she seems to be in control of where she is now there's no wheat to get lost in. I have Loc8tor trackers on them and have tracked her down the hedges a few times when I was still supervising - very amusing to have to crawl into the hawthorn to grab a wriggling monster and take her home.
Anyway enough about my monsters - very best wishes with Buddy, and very well done for not giving up hope and getting him back home.
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Hi Bombay cat, I am so happy that Mia is all happy, question, what are shrews?, are they like mice?, I'm a city girl and don't know! Please don't feel guilty that Mia came home before Buddy, it's a miracle both of them made it home!
Buddy is still in recovery, I see small steps he makes, he will eat in front of me more as long as I pretend I can't see him. And he is talking to me, albeit from under the sofa but I always talk back to acknowledge I know he is there.
It prob won't be for a good couple of months more before he can go in the garden again but at least I know he is safe and well!.
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Shrews are like mice but with pointed noses and they have a lovely coat......afraid I only see dead ones cos my lot hunt them.
Buddy sounds like he is coming on ;D
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I don't think I have ever met a shrew!, Dead or alive!
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Im so pleased that Buddy is still making progress....you must also be proud of you too as through your love and patience this has happened! :wow: :hug:
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sounds like buddy is improving - you've done an amazing job!
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Glad to hear things are improving :)
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We still have a very long way to go, part of my talking to him is telling him he is being daft!
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It's good to hear that Buddy is starting to heal though :hug:
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Great to hear Buddy is making progress, he'll relax again eventually I'm sure with all your patience. Very best wishes to brave Buddy from all of us.
Shrew: http://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd240/dovey1977/common-shrew-3806.jpg (http://i220.photobucket.com/albums/dd240/dovey1977/common-shrew-3806.jpg) - they squeak really loudly when they are still alive and they run very fast but don't see too well. Cats aren't supposed to like the taste but no-one told my Ted that.
Mia just brought a field mouse and is happily crunching on the rug....
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I have never seen a live one only dead :(
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Thanks for the picture of the shrew, I have definitely never seen one, they are very interesting looking!
On the Buddy front, he came out and pushed with his paw a few times a furry swinging toy thing I was moving on the floor, first time any form of engagement with me!,Only lasted a minute as the next small whoosh of the toy had him diving back under the sofa but it's a step in the right direction!
Cheers for all the support
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:wooooo: That is so good to hear....Obviously his curiosity has started to get the better of him! :Luv2: :hug:
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:hug: great news!
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Attaboy Buddy: who loves ya?
He'll get there, Miriam, he'll get there :hug:
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That's absolutely a joy to hear. It should be all downhill from here; one step forward after another ;D
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Oh Miriam that wonderful .... Buddy is obviously beginning to feel more safe and secure and I'm sure his interactions will become more frequent and longer each time from now on. :hug:
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thanks guys. Buddy seems to wait until about 30 mins after I've gone to sleep to call me to interact with him, so I getting very little constant sleep these days but it's all worth it. I am thinking of pretending to go to bed earlier so he will come out to play before real bed time!. I am like a zombie swooshing a toy around the floor at midnight, then 2.30 am, then at 4.30 am, then at 6am! :rofl: :rofl: all the hours I am awake, he is not interested!!
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you're luckier than me in that respect, Miriam, as Tosker won't play with an interactive toy - because he never has interacted with humans, I suspect
he does go absolutely mad playing by himself with a little mouse or soft ball though - and his timings are quite similar :evillaugh:
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Maybe as its dark he thinks you cant see him Miriam :rofl: :rofl: Cats have the art of oneupcatpersonship ;D ;D He sounds like he is coming out of his shell at last ;D
Trigger now that Tosker goes on the bed....bedmice are just the thing and its how I taught Kocka to play and go onto greater things like Mr Fish on a stick and line ;D
Thats a hand under the duvet moving and wait for him to pounce amd catch it and be well protected :rofl:
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.....And your luckier than me Trigger, My Blackie does not do play one bit and I have had him almost 3 yrs....What I do know is that he really enjoys the cats company and he has a pal in Gizzy, for that I am made up! ;)
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How's Buddy getting on now Miriam? Hope he's settling down now :hug:
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Hi Helen, Thanks for checking on us!
Buddy still spends the bulk of his time under the sofa but will come out late at night to walk around and sometimes play a game. He hisses if I go to close to his hiding place. At the weekend I completely cleaned out his hiding place, much to his annoyance but there was so much fur there I could have made a jumper! A little feliway spray and he went back under!
Just wish I could get him to the vet's for a check up
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Gosh, I can't believe he hasn't worked out yet that he is home and safe. It must be so difficult for you. :hug: I wonder what he went through.
Karen
x
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Maybe time has come for you to take him to the vets anyway, if he is not ill and you are insured, maybe a referral to Vicky Halls may be a good idea :hug: :hug: :hug:
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I would definitely take him to the vet Miriam, as I said before you never know there could be something physically wrong with him that's contributing to his behaviour, he may be fine but I think it is better to get him checked over :hug:
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Will your vet perhaps do a home visit for you, Miriam?
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Yep a check from the vet will give you some peace of mind....Best wishes! :Luv2:
(Thought you had gone on holiday with your Purrs winning's Miriam!) :wow:
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any tips are how to get him into the carrier????, would I have to wear about 10 layers on my arms and hands! I'll call the vets in the morning and see what they say
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My way would be to shut all doors so he is in a room where there is nothing, or little to hide behind and then to block him in the corner with the carrier covered with a towel and the door open. So you need some hard board or cardboard big enough to do this. If there is anything that he can get under or behind it wont work.
The aim would to be to get him to walk in so you can slam the door but before trying this you need an arrangement with the vet that once you have caught him you can just turn up, but make sure its a vet who is used to dealing with ferals and is kind and gentle.
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I wonder what on earth must have happened to him to make him so scared :( Really hope he starts to relax soon :hug:
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We catch our ferals by cornering them - we have also used the covered ccage technique - it may be worth getting the cat basket out without the door on so he can associate it with a safe place - we cover one crusher with a blanket and they rush to hide from scarey parents when they know the vets visit is due then we cover hole slide in door and hey presto one skitzy feral already to go - we also keeo the crush cages covered when we are at the vet after Sabrina shredded a child who despite telling no don't touch did!
Sabrina was fine child shredded! :shocked:
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Did you manage to get him to the vets yet Miriam? :hug:
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I tried calling the vet's a few time but the phone was not being picked up, I guess the staff were busy at the time's I called and with each 'not get through', it made me think, could I undo any of the small improvements Buddy has made by taking him completely out of his safe place?. He seems quite happy here when I am not around/awake, playing with toys for example. In Vicky's Hall books, she warns how hiding cats can completely lose any form of trust with you if you upset them too far beyond what they deem as acceptable cohabitation. It does break my heart that he hasn't settled down yet, I've tried nearly all of the recommendations that I believe were suitable for him.
There are no obvious signs of illness or physical problems which is why I constantly err on the side of caution. Just wish he would trust me again!
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Does his pal still come around? I wonder if allowing him/her in would help him feel more comfortable...He did use to go outside before and Im sure all this confinement is adding to his stress (not your fault of course)! ;) :hug: :hug:
Sometime's it can take another cat to encourage their behaviour! Just a thought! ;) :hug: :hug:
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His friends are still coming round but just to the patio as that is where they used to hang out, but I do open the window (attended) when they come by in case they can pick up each others smell, I don't know for sure. Right now he is talking to me from behind the curtain which he always does when he I am thinking of going to bed!, I guess he is telling me to go to bed so that he can come out and play!
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how to move forward is the problem, by the sound of it
I think he has to learn that he does not have to hide away to avoid being looked at or touched - I would be tempted to remove all opportunity for him to hide away - if this is at all practical - and leave him only a high perch with a cushion or blanket overlooking the room, and an igloo type bed facing into the room, to retreat to
and then totally ignore him, while moving around the room normally yourself - he will learn eventually that nothing bad happens to him with this arrangement, and be ready to move on to the next stage
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I agree with Trigger's advice there! When we took Blackie on (he is a true feral) we first put him in a room of his own, over time he has been moved to more open rooms....He would run at the sight of a human... He has now accepted that they can walk past him without him running away or trying to hide! :hug: :hug: :hug:
If I did not push him, he would still be scared stiff to move from the litter tray! ;)
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It's true, we are at a cross road with no obvious direction forward. Being under the sofa, that is the best hiding place, I having been toying with the idea of putting the sofa out of service, ie, on its side to see his reaction
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I would be tempted to try something Miriam, he really needs to know that you are not the enemy here! :hug: :hug: :hug:
Just remember and I know its really hard but continue to ignore him once you have him more open! ;) :hug: :hug:
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I can't see any harm in trying it - he'll maybe find another hiding place, and you don't want him to feel he isn't safe anywhere, which is why I would deliberately offer some semi-safe places which you never disturb
what really made the difference with Tosker was my neighbour's decision to clear out all the rubbish from his garage - he gradually removed all Tosker's hidey holes, which drove him towards me and the kennel waiting for him - once he started going in the kennel I never went near him, so he still felt safe
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I think a five sided box with his bedding in it should be left on a far side of the room for him so he can sit in there and watch but feel safe.
It needs to be big enough for him to sit up in as well as lie down
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Did you come up with anything Miriam or are YOU hiding under the upturned couch? :evillaugh: :hug: :hug:
Hope your plans are showing progression however small! ;) :hug:
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BUMP!!! Anything happened for the good of late Miriam? :hug: :hug:
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Hi Bazsmum, he has his good days and bad days!. I'm working on getting his friends to come inside. They let me stroke them but pause on actually stepping inside from the back door but I think I am getting closer! Cheers for checking in.
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that sounds good ;D
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you need to lay a trail of Dreamies for them, Miriam :sneaky:
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That's great to hear....I reckon cats can help other's in certain circumstances! ;) :hug: :hug:
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Hi Miriam,
Was just wondering how Buddy was getting on :hug:
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wow, hi there!
Buddy never did fully recover sadly but he is home safe and well and plays every now and then, He sits in his old places but doesn't like to be touched anymore so I respect that. He likes watching the birds in the garden and is happier that it is getting warmer.
Thankyou so much from me and Buddy for asking xx
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Poor Buddy , hopefully one day he will realise he is safe now -wonder what on earth happened to him :'( :'(
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Poor Buddy :hug: :hug:
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He must be seriously traumatised. Hopefully it will just need time to bring him back. At least he is safe with you. :)
:hug:
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I've just read your story from the beginning and what a journey!
I'm glad he's safe with you and hope he fully comes out of his shell one day soon
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what a shame he is still so wary - I hope he goes back to his old self one day :hug:
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Zenith, I reckon it must of taken a while to get thru!, thankyou for the interest.
Dawn, yep, he is still wary but I do believe that he knows that I won't harm him, he just has to believe it!
At least he doesn't spend all his time behind the sofa now and I get to actually see him!
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Ahhhh poor poor baby he really must have had a horrid time when he was lost but at least he has you and he knows he is safe and loved and that you will never force him to do anything he doesn't want. I'm glad he has finally decided to venture out from behind the sofa and you never know in time he may actually start to interact with you again. :hug:
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How is Buddy doing now?