Author Topic: New Kitten and my resident cat it NOT HAPPY! HELP PLEASE!  (Read 6495 times)

Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: New Kitten and my resident cat it NOT HAPPY! HELP PLEASE!
« Reply #10 on: October 09, 2020, 02:07:16 AM »
Just thought,I do a lot of thinking at stupid o'clock in the morning, you could try exhausting her with a red dot laser toy, Pippa literally climbs the walls after it, Bob just watches it, she looks like a Wimbledon spectator, :evillaugh: Emo languidly pursues it, Pi goes mad. Merli used to love it. It may make her a little calmer around your older cat. Just  finking. Nothing else to do at this time of the morning.
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Offline Lyn (Slugsta)

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Re: New Kitten and my resident cat it NOT HAPPY! HELP PLEASE!
« Reply #9 on: September 08, 2020, 09:55:54 AM »
As Paula said, there is a wide range of wall mounted cat trees, shelves and beds if floor space is at a premium.

Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: New Kitten and my resident cat it NOT HAPPY! HELP PLEASE!
« Reply #8 on: September 08, 2020, 03:21:41 AM »
If you don't have room for cat trees, you can also get wall mounted cat beds. Spraying things with catnip spray can also encourage friendly interaction too.

P.S. My mantra is WWSD, What would Sue do. :rofl: She is very wise in the ways of our furred friends. :)
« Last Edit: September 08, 2020, 03:24:08 AM by Judecat (Paula), Reason: additional text »
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Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: New Kitten and my resident cat it NOT HAPPY! HELP PLEASE!
« Reply #7 on: September 04, 2020, 15:57:35 PM »
Good to hear there's some progress Kinda.   ;D

I'd put money on your little girl going back for more being play motivated.  Kittens don't have an off switch, which is generally what cheeses older cats off.   :-:  No doubt Rocky will be planning all manner of revenge attacks, but it's great to hear he's been spending more time in the house. 

If you can give him higher up spaces that only he can access for now, it might help.  We bought two large floor to ceiling cat trees with various sleeping platforms.  That worked for a while to keep our two semi-ferals away from Moray until of course they were big enough to mountaineer the platforms themselves.  Now they all adopt one of the platforms for their own, swapping round from time to time.  Was a sound investment though, if you have space and cash for one.   :)

Offline Kindajackson

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Re: New Kitten and my resident cat it NOT HAPPY! HELP PLEASE!
« Reply #6 on: September 02, 2020, 11:40:41 AM »
Hello

Thank you for all of your useful advice. I have watched the videos and my house is filled with Feliway Pheromones!   I didn't go back to the start as I knew the kitten would not be locked in a room again, she's a little scamp who cries and cries when locked in and loves to run around the house.  Rocky my OG has become a little better. He's IN a lot more and sleeping in his old bed in the living room much more.  They seem to being doing a little dance now where they will chase each other around the house and try to each get a higher position (one climbs on a chair, the other then gets on the table).  Rocky still hisses and has gone for her a few times and I've broken them up, but she does go back for more, so I am unsure whether this is aggression or play?  She now leaves him alone when he hisses at her, but she still follows him around the house!  I can't yet leave them alone as I think Rocky still wants to kill her when we are not looking but I think there is some slight progress! 

thanks
Kinda

Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: New Kitten and my resident cat it NOT HAPPY! HELP PLEASE!
« Reply #5 on: August 29, 2020, 20:25:33 PM »
I swear by Zylkene, it really stopped my new at the time, 6.2 kilo cat from bullying my other older cat, Emo. he didn't really try with the three younger ones as they would biff him back, but Emo is a gentle soul, it didn't stop it altogether, but certainly helped. They would even sleep together in the end, I found Bephar (sp) spot on helped too, I found the cheapest was Amazon, whatever you do, don't buy from the vet, they charge so much more.

I hope that helps. Good luck!
Oscar Wilde on his adored Mog "The Mighty Atom that purrs and furrs"

Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: New Kitten and my resident cat it NOT HAPPY! HELP PLEASE!
« Reply #4 on: August 29, 2020, 06:40:01 AM »
Other things you can try:

Plug ins (smell to us a little like sweaty socks) - Pet Remedy or Feliway.  I would try at least two - one upstairs and one in your boy's favoured hang out spot.  You can buy these from Pets at Home, some vets, and online.

Zylkene - a supplement which many of us have found successful.  It's a milk protein based capsule which you break open and sprinkle over food.  Cats seem to love them, and they have a calming effect.  You don't need a vet prescription to buy them.  Your vet may have them but if not again try Pets at Home, surplus or online.

Offline Lyn (Slugsta)

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Re: New Kitten and my resident cat it NOT HAPPY! HELP PLEASE!
« Reply #3 on: August 28, 2020, 19:54:05 PM »
Hi and  :welcome: - although I'm sorry you have the problem that has sent you to us  :(

As Sue said, I think going back to scratch and taking things incredibly slowly is the way to go. Make sure that your lad has places he can escape to if he wants to when you do let them share a space. I know that Jackson Galaxy suggests having vertical space to increase territory and making it somewhere that kitten can't access will give your lad somewhere that he can 'own'.

We brought our second cat home 4 years ago and they just about tolerate each other. That is partly because circumstances mean we can't do some of the things that would be helpful (she's on medication, can't be allowed out, very wary of people and has taken over the bedroom that used to be resident cat's special place) but I doubt they would ever be the 'friends' that I had hoped for  :(

Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: New Kitten and my resident cat it NOT HAPPY! HELP PLEASE!
« Reply #2 on: August 28, 2020, 10:32:13 AM »
Hello, KindaJackson. Welcome to Purrs.  Am sorry you've found us because of difficult circumstances, and can just imagine how anxious you're feeling about trying to integrate your new kitten with your more senior cat.

Sadly, sometimes cats simply prefer being the only cat. 

We had this very issue ourselves many years ago.  We had a 4 year old cat, Paddy, who was a rather serious cat, albeit very loving.  We then introduced a kitten who adored  Paddy.  He would follow him round, and do everything he could to get Paddy's attention, but Paddy was horrified.  It was a little akin to letting a woman inside a Victorian Gentleman's Club.    :omg:  Paddy began staying out more, and running away when he saw Flynn.  Eventually, he learned to tolerate Flynn.  Flynn's adoration of Paddy never waned, but it was never really reciprocated, although occasional snuggled-up sleeping would take place, and at times you could see frustrated grooming going on - Paddy was always a very clean cat whereas Flynn was a little scruffpot (although I suspect that may have been a deliberate ploy to get the fastidious Paddy to groom him  :evillaugh:)

When we lost Flynn at the age of 4, Paddy reverted to being a much happier and more relaxed cat, who began to reclaim his home.  It was sad, but taught us a valuable lesson.  We should have weighed up our cat's personality before invading his space.  That said, we've put ourselves in the same position twice more, and thankfully both have worked out well. 

When you think about it, there's your cat, happily safe in the knowledge he's found himself a great gaff.  The people he found love him - they think he's Ace.  They're his kinda people.  His people gave him a safe place to stay and to eat, and to relax and play and really enjoy his life.  Then suddenly, someone else moved in and began to muscle in on his space, his people, his food.   Imagine if you returned home one day and found some stranger making themselves comfy on your furniture, chatting to your son and having a coffee and a sarnie from your own supplies.   :-:  This is how your lad will be feeling.   :-[ >:(

That said, in your situation, it really is early days.  I would go back to scratch (no pun intended) restricting your new little girl in your son's room.  You will need to spend equal times playing with your older cat, and your younger cat while this is in place.  For a week or so at least, don't let them see each other.  If you scent swap, just leave the scent marked cloth somewhere unobtrusive, where your older boy can investigate it maybe at night, when no-one is around to see.  It needs to be somewhere that isn't immediately in an area that he has to pass, but where he can access it if he wants to.   This needs to go slowly.   It's easy for us to impose our own time limits on events, and to want to hurry them along, but that just risks more upset.

If this works, and things settle down, with your boy beginning to reclaim his territory again, then you can think about trying feeding on either side of a closed door.   I'd suggest not a glass door, but a solid door.  When we did this with Moray (one of our current cats) when we brought home our two semi feral kittens, it was what began to make a difference.  It also worked with our previous two cats.  Curiosity can get the better of them.  But - this has to go slowly, and at your boy's pace. 

If the feeding behind a closed door works, then you can try opening the door an inch or so, and moving the food back a bit from either side of the door.   If that works, you can try feeding in the same room but at opposite ends of the room.  Again, take things at the cats' pace, and remember that kittens don't know their boundaries, so they can be rude and pushy in the eyes of an adult cat.   Your boy really needs to be the priority, as the kitten will be more adaptable.

Always make sure your boy has safe places he can call his own, so he can beat a retreat if he feels the need.

If this goes well, you could try letting the kitten have access to the main living space, and your boy access to your son's room for a half an hour or so at a time.  Give them a litter tray each, and a spare if you have room.  That said, we have three adult cats and one tray, which works reasonably well as two cats wont use a tray and prefer to go outside.   :shify:

There are excellent resources on introductions on Youtube, if you search for Jackson Galaxy and cat introductions, which I'd suggest is a great starting point: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZrwcoiy_gY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tsYT7yIOdqQ

Hopefully, over time, they will learn to live together peaceably, though you must be prepared to accept that may not mean they are anything other than house mates.   

If you try the advice and it doesnt work, and your boy continues to stay away from his home, you need to consider whether that was how he became a stray in the first place.  During that time, he would have had to fend for himself, and to use his initiative to find food and shelter. 

Though I'm pretty sure you'd be heartbroken if you had to make such a choice (which is clear from your desire to make the situation work) bear in mind that it's generally easier to re-home a kitten than an adult cat, and really your boy has to be your priority. 

If you try some of the things recommended and it still doesn't work out, then think about whether you could get a safe home for your little girl through one of your local re-homing centres or cat rescues. 

Please let us know how you get on.  If you have any photos we could see, that would be lovely.  We love looking at other people's cats almost as much as we love looking at our own.   ;D

Offline Kindajackson

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New Kitten and my resident cat it NOT HAPPY! HELP PLEASE!
« Reply #1 on: August 28, 2020, 09:37:53 AM »
Hello,

So I have a beautiful 5 year old tabby who has been the sole feline resident of my home for the past 4 years.  He came to me as a stray and adopted us. He's been a pure joy and the friendliest, most loving cat in the world. He always preferred to spend time with the family choosing to be where we are.  3 weeks ago we brought a new female kitten into our home.  I put her in my sons room as a safe space for 4 days. During this time I swapped scents but my resident cat would turn away from anything that smelt of her.  When I first visually introduced them I put them either side of a glass door and there was a lot of hissing and growling.  Over the next few days I started feeding them together. My resident cat would eat and then get very upset and want to go out.  He stayed out even in the rain.  I created a safe space for him in my other sons room where she is not allowed to go but now he sleeps in there all day long.  She keeps trying to approach him and he gets very upset, hissing, crying and growling and desperate to get out and away from her.  I fear that he is very very unhappy.  I took him to the vets as I am worried at his lack of energy, not wanting to play at all and sleeping all day.  She said he is physically fine (might have slight back pain and he's now on painkillers) but she noticed a change in his temperament as he's usually so loving).  Will I ever get my old cat back?  Anyone have a similar story and is there light at the end of the tunnel? Thanks in advance

 


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