Author Topic: Awful decision  (Read 2074 times)

Offline Tan

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Awful decision
« Reply #11 on: October 24, 2014, 23:33:09 PM »
I have wrestled with this for years, always wanting the very best and freedom for my babes but also their safety and you so sadly can't have both :(
The only way I have some peace in the stress of that decision is to have a cat proof garden so at least they can go out but they still get bored and I know would love to be out wondering  but at least they are happy enough and safe.

Their sadly ain't no answer unless ya live in such a remote area there are not many dangers out there.
Sending you hugs

Offline sunshinekath

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Re: Awful decision
« Reply #10 on: October 24, 2014, 17:21:20 PM »
Have you ever thought about a second cat? Maybe your cat is bored living alone, so a playmate would facilitate the situation.....

Offline R and R

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Re: Awful decision
« Reply #9 on: October 17, 2014, 18:24:45 PM »
it's a really hard choice you have....Maybe keep her in for winter see how she goes maybe she will forget about her wanderings or if she is really depressed then you can let her out at a safer time of year.... You could also try to bring novel items into your garden from the outside as describe in this article :-

http://www.purrsinourhearts.co.uk/index.php/topic,14312.0.html

Our two are indoor only, this was not the intention when we go them but we soon realised that Rico is deaf... and we live in London near are very busy road and I have recently found out that there are lilies (not sure what type) planted out at the front of our flats and for various other reasons I don't think I could have a free roaming cat now fortunately they seen quite happy with their indoor life..... Which brings me on another suggestion, do you think she would like a play mate?   

Offline maryas

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Re: Awful decision
« Reply #8 on: October 17, 2014, 16:22:57 PM »
 :welcome: to Purrs and sorry you are having it hard  :hug:

We've all been there and the decision n the end is yours.  I've always had outdoor cats but I got Bonnie from the RSPCA nearly 6 years ago at the age of 10 and she had just had her tail removed and had been in the RSPCA for 9 months recovering.

I di not want to let Bonnie out because my previous cat, Smudge had been missing for 7 months and then finally found her dead from a traffic accident.  As I was distraught from that I didn't want to let Bonnie put and luckily she's never bothered about it.  Not really sure what I would've done ifshe had bothered about going out.

Good luck.

Mary
Love me, love my cat - don't love my cat... S*D off! R.I.P Smudgie - sleep well my precious little darling, I miss you so much. 01.02.94-15.04.08 x Look after the beautiful Bonnie Bum, I took her pain away 02.04.15 x Tisha was with me 3 weeks and then I had to take her pain away 1.7.15 x

Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: Awful decision
« Reply #7 on: October 17, 2014, 14:53:20 PM »
This is a terrible dilemma.

My first cat came to me in London and its thought she had been dumped before Catchat, before Purrs and before I knew anything about cats.

I lived on a road that ran around a square of houses and there was an overgrown npassaage between the houses on my side and those backing on. The roads were full of cars  parked and coming and going. There were also loads of cats and we were very close to the main London/Brighton road.

Kocka was in and out all the time and knew how to rush out the ffront door and make her way roun d to come back in at back and agree with whoever said that in the cities cats seem to be more savvy/

I moved here to a rural loacation with a big garden and have a small road at front which is desperately busy  frpm 0600 to about 2000 and my cats are the only ones, a few doors up they had 2 killed on this road.

My two moggies started going out about 2 months after arriving here and used to keave the garden at back and roam, there is a hige boggy field and what used to be a track between me and it..................someone has turned it moreorless into a road and now meighbours cars, vans, lorries use it to access houses and no longer safe but the moggies are now 16 and 13 and cannot easily get out and dont try.

However I also have a young birman who cannot be trusted climbs everything, tries to escape and I knew from day one he was going to be a problem!! He was 10 months when I got him and intended him to be an indoor cat but he decided different so I bought him a lead and a walking jacket and he went out in the garden in that. Up to a cou[ple of years ago that was fine and I could put the lead on its max 16ftish and tie end to something and come in house to do things for a while BUT clever bloomin trevor then found out how to wind round things that enabled him to get out of jacket and escape from garden................................total panic as one of my neighbours threatens to kill my cats.

So now even on a very short lead he isw totally untrustworthy!

For last week the weather bhere as been apalling. no way was I going out in it so he cant either. I kept him in all winter  and I suspect he will not go out again until next year. I know he hates it but he would be dead within 24 hours if allowed to roam. Birmans are ridiculously clever and when he sees the sun out even for 5 mins he is telling me he wants out!

A terribly decision to have to make and although Lupin is a really norty cat! I have had to make the decision to keep him safe.

Offline Liz

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Re: Awful decision
« Reply #6 on: October 17, 2014, 11:29:59 AM »
Here at the Clan we have a mixture of indoor only - parents choice as they have issues and some are ferals who have no interest in going back out no matter how hard I tried so they live in the bedroomend of the house with the familyroom, 3 bedrooms, a bathroomand 2 Studies to play in

Then there are my indoor/outdoor crew made up of domestics, Bengals and former ferals who are all in at night and get out after I have walked my 3 dogs in the morning.

Then there are my outside only at their choice ferals and a domestic who was dumped here with 3 kittens who are now all tamed down and living the life of riley on the inside as theya re only 16 weeks old but once snipped will get access to the outside if they choose it

The I have my 2 ragdolls and a couple of former ferals who live on the indoor/outdoor side of the house who don't go out but choose to loive in the diningroom, lounge and conservatory, and kitchen and theya re happy enough to do that

I do let ours have access if they want it and even though I live in the middle of nowhere have lost 2 on my track this year to speeding vans who have all slowed down now and are well warned!!!!

Sometimes you have to do what ever you do to let them be happy, I know the ones lost to the track were happy doing what they did and I am at peace that they have a huge garden, paddock and 16 acres of woods to play in but sometimes they will wander despite our best efforts but all mine are ID chipped even the outside ferals and any we deal with are all snipped and chipped to me and our wonderful vets phone us everytime something withina 5 mile radius is found just to check its not a Clan cat and so far they haen't been and we have done an awful lot of ferals over the last 8 years some have stayed and some choose to move on
Liz and the Clan Cats and Dogs

Offline lynnv

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Re: Awful decision
« Reply #5 on: October 17, 2014, 10:16:39 AM »
Many thanks for you replies.  I think deep down I know in the end she will go out and am just putting off the inevitable.  I just wish she had chosen summertime to do this.

The few times she has got out, she has always stayed just to the back of the house so am hoping she wont wonder to far.  She has been spayed and when she is in the garden she will always come into the house at some point to check we're still at home.

I know once we get into a routine I'll feel a bit better about it.  Am also going to keep her in during the night.  We have a cat flat - so far never used! but she keeps looking at it, so don't think it will take her long to learn how to use it.

Offline hollycat

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Re: Awful decision
« Reply #4 on: October 17, 2014, 09:02:07 AM »


Because of where I live my cats are housecats. Two very busy roads and cat heaven at the other side, fields and woodland. I made the choice to keep them in as many cats have been run over in the last couple of years. My neighbour led hers out, but they are older,8 and 9 and much more streetwise.

It's difficult but I'm sure you will make the right choice for your gorgeous girl  ;D

Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: Awful decision
« Reply #3 on: October 17, 2014, 07:07:27 AM »


Never an easy one to answer this, as so much depends on the individual cat.  Generally speaking,  most cats who've experienced the outdoors, want more of it.  It's their natural state and informs much of their senses about their surroundings and their life.  Having said that, there are cats who are perfectly happy being indoor only cats because they know no different. 

It's understandable you're going to be worried and concerned about her wellbeing - it's a dilemma that faces all of us in this situation.   There are no guarantees whether you live in the city or a rural area - cats can and do get killed on roads every day, and evidence appears to suggest that those cats who live in towns and cities may be more street savvy and ultimately fare proportionally better.

Personally, I dont know.  We live in a semi rural area, but I've lost two of my own cats to accidents in 2 years, and this year alone one of our neighbours cats was killed and the other injured in an RTA. 

As Sootyca says, you have to weigh up whether your happiness outweighs their happiness, or whether a cat proofed garden is a compromise.  You've tried the compromise, yet your lovely girl is still curious and maybe wants a wider world than she has at the moment.

You seem to be doing and providing everything you possibly can to ensure she has a fulfilled and stimulating home arena, so I dont think her desire to explore furtehr iis from any lack of care at home.   :hug:

If I had the opportunity, I'd cat proof our garden, but as it's very small, I suspect I'd be faced with two very unhappy cats, and therefore at present, I go along with my husband who also feels it's better that they live a happy and fulfilled life, for however long or short a period of time that may be.  But, if that decision was the right one for you, you have to be steeled against the possibility that the world is filled with obstacles and danger.

That said, you wouldnt keep a child cooped up on the basis of "what if this happened..." and a cat is essentially a much wilder spirit than a child and with a modicum of survival instinct that is arguably more finely honed.

If you decide to bite the bullet and let her out, do so when she's not eaten, so hopefully hunger will eventually turn her towards home sooner rather than later.  Good luck with whatever you decide.   :hug:

Offline Sootyca

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Re: Awful decision
« Reply #2 on: October 17, 2014, 02:09:59 AM »
I guess there is no right or wrong answer.  Robbie goes out, uncatproofed garden and doesn't stray onto any roads that I've seen but goes into other gardens.  Sky would only go out if a door is left open for her to get back in and doesn't leave the garden. 

Robbie is a worry sometimes but has always come back (sometimes needed bribing with treats) and I don;t think he would like being confined once he knows the world is bigger than his garden.  The price I pay for his happiness is the knowledge that he could have a shorter lifespan and get into trouble.  I weigh that up against his overall happiness and think it is a price I can pay - though I know I would be devastated.

The payoff is that neither have access outside after 10pm at night or before 7am usually.  From kittenhood Robbie has been in his own room, with food and litter etc, overnight and is used to it.  Sky quickly adapted.  I can't sleep with either on my bed over night and would drive me mad having disturbed sleep!

oh, and your girl is beautiful :)

Offline lynnv

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Awful decision
« Reply #1 on: October 16, 2014, 23:57:12 PM »
Sorry in advance for the long post, but want to give an accurate picture of what is happening.

I got my precious girl when she was 8 weeks old, the woman I brought her from just wanted rid! I could see she was not looking well and knew if I left her behind she may not have survived.  So the next day I took her to the emergency vets who confirmed cat flu.  So after 6 weeks on antibiotics and eye infections etc. she survived with lots of TLC and care.  As you can probably gather she has been spoilt ever since.

She is now 22 months old and quite well, sometimes I can hear her wheezing while asleep and if she jumps down from anything, she lets out a little squeak.

We did not want her going out, but felt she needed some freedom, so we cat proofed the garden with chicken wire at a 45 degree angle going all the way around.  Now this has been 99 per cent successful  and the times she has got out we have found her within 5 minute's.  She has what we call her lookout post in the garden - this being a play/climbing frame she can view the street from within the garden.  When we are at work or asleep she comes into the house and if she's in the garden we check on her every 10 mins or so.

Now the problem is the other day she managed to get out again and I found her after 15 min's of panic!.  But since then she seems very unhappy with being in the garden and keeps trying to look for ways out and I'm scared she will hurt herself trying to get out, so have been sitting in the garden with her while she is in the garden.  Now the best will in the world I can't sit outside in the garden with her all night while she plays.  She honestly gets all out attention and am pretty sure we have more cat gyms than furniture in the house, we also actively play games with her like chase.

I Wondered if someone has had the same situation.  I don't want a depressed cat and the last thing I want to do is make her unhappy.  Is it just that some cats want out more than others or will she fall back into the old routine if I keep at it long enough.  I have purchased a loc8tor for her in case I do let het out, but just the thought makes me sick with worry.  I live in a quite village with an A road just up from my house to the front but a small friendly cul-de sac and fields to the back. 

I just am a loss at the moment as to what to do

 


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