I have to say Peter, judging from what you've been saying, I think in your heart your mind is already made up.
Between us all here we have successfully raised many children alongside cats with no problems. We can show concrete proof cats do no harm to babies providing commonsense steps are taken and being around cats has a positive benefit to children as they grow. And yes we
put our babies first too as well - what parent wouldn't?
Yet sometimes the 'new parent' gene kicks in, often fuelled by poorly researched advice offered by well meaning but wrong people, and it's hard to see past that point or listen to acurate clinical evidence.
How many vet nurses, vets or zoo keepers raise their own babies alongside animal babies without issues?
Please don't let it get to the stage where you stop trusting your cats. They need and deserve your love and support too. They will suffer if you allow your feelings toward them to change as they will sense it. It will confuse them if you stop allowing them to do things which they were allowed to do before.
I would say unless you can see and are prepared to take in all the evidence and advice you've been offered by people who've faced your circumstances before, the best action is to take up these rescue spaces and allow the rescues to give your cats a fresh start where they will be allowed to express their full personalities and natures.