Author Topic: Is it time to let my baby go?  (Read 16687 times)

Offline Sootyca

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #53 on: August 24, 2018, 22:46:56 PM »
Thanks everyone for all your supportive words.
It's been 2 weeks Monday. I'm driving myself nutty as I still keep thinking I hear him clawing at his huge scratch post (one thing I can't bare to move at the mo)
His beds are still dotted in every room of the house.He was like my shadow! I couldn't even go to the toilet without him howling & scratching at the door. I still cannot get over the fact i won't ever see him again. Our home feels so different without him. Our hearts are truly broken 💔

Five weeks on from Robbie leaving me and I'm still struggling.  It will take as long as it needs to.  We had years to love them......you can't move on from that kind of love in a short space of time.

 :hug: :hug:

Offline Desley (booktigger)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #52 on: August 24, 2018, 12:34:31 PM »
 :hug: :hug:
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Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #51 on: August 23, 2018, 22:50:23 PM »
Oh Lisa. :hug: :hug: :hug:
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Offline lisa77

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #50 on: August 23, 2018, 21:13:43 PM »
Thanks everyone for all your supportive words.
It's been 2 weeks Monday. I'm driving myself nutty as I still keep thinking I hear him clawing at his huge scratch post (one thing I can't bare to move at the mo)
His beds are still dotted in every room of the house.He was like my shadow! I couldn't even go to the toilet without him howling & scratching at the door. I still cannot get over the fact i won't ever see him again. Our home feels so different without him. Our hearts are truly broken 💔
« Last Edit: August 23, 2018, 21:20:37 PM by lisa77 »

Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #49 on: August 23, 2018, 20:47:54 PM »
How are you all Lisa?  :hug: :hug: :hug:
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Offline girlinleeds

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #48 on: August 19, 2018, 21:25:15 PM »
Thinking of you Lisa, we had our beautiful Bella pts in April and it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, but it was the right thing to do xxx

Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #47 on: August 15, 2018, 05:43:14 AM »


Thinking of you Lisa and sending you  :hug:


Offline Sootyca

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #46 on: August 14, 2018, 23:58:47 PM »
Hope you are okay Lisa   :hug: :hug:

Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #45 on: August 14, 2018, 20:03:33 PM »
RIGHT NOW I WOULD NOT THROW ANYTHING AWAY, ITS THE LINK YOU STILL HAVE.

I STILL HAVE SOME MEDS OF NAPOLIAN IN FRIDGE  :-[ BUT HAVE A BAG OF TOYS AND OTHER BELONGINGS OF EACH CAT, SAVED FOR WHEN I CAN EVEN FACE LOOKING AT THEM

A VERY LONG WAY YOU HAVE TO TRAVEL YET, TAKE CARE AND GO SLOW

Offline Desley (booktigger)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #44 on: August 14, 2018, 13:31:18 PM »
Saw this on Facebook and thought I’d share. I personally would remove most of his things, if you do decide to get another cat, your daughter can help choose new things then x

There is a cycle of love and death that shapes the lives of those who choose to travel in the company of animals. It is a cycle unlike any other. To those who have never lived through its turnings or walked its rocky path, our willingness to give our hearts with full knowledge that they will be broken seems incomprehensible. Only we know how small a price we pay for what we receive; our grief, no matter how powerful, is an insufficient measure of the joy we have been given.
Please spay your cat



Offline Sootyca

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #43 on: August 14, 2018, 08:38:03 AM »
Thanks so much everyone.

A zillion things are going round in my head.
All the if's & buts & what if's.

For the past 2 weeks his water fountain, syringes, litter tray, bowls of water all over the house, his meds, were our life line. Now they mean absolutely nothing because he's not here anymore.

I am trying to hold it together for my daughter Robyn but we always called Leo her brother as Robyn was our IVF miracle & we couldn't have anymore.

I'm sorry, I'm rambling..

Just in total shock still I think. I can still smell him. I keep finding his hair on my clothes. I miss him so much 😭😭😭😭

The Ifs and Buts are so common - I still have them 3 weeks after Robbie passed and I probably always will have.  But it will drag you down.  Focus on the life you had with him, albeit shorter than it should have been - I know, Robbie was only 11 as well and should have so many more years left.

I didn't have a choice of urn - just the one from the crematorium.  His ashes are in a bag inside which can be moved.  At some point I will have some of them made into a piece of jewelry, just not quite yet.

All cats are special but some do wiggle their way into your heart a bit more than others!   :hug: :hug:

Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #42 on: August 14, 2018, 07:45:56 AM »


Lisa, you can get some beautiful urns online.   :hug:

I know it's very early days, but I agree with Paula.  Don't make any hasty decisions about his things.  I must admit to one of Mac's favourite little toys being passed on to Ross, who loved it to bits, and in his turn, left it behind for Moray (who completely ignored it!) :innocent:

You can never ever replace a precious friend.  But what you can do, is open your life to another who needs love and a great home.  And when you do that, you open yourself up to all manner of possibilities you never considered. 

We never thought we'd end up with two semi feral girls.  And yet, we now have our little family of three, and I wouldn't be without any of them.  If anything, the addition of the gurlies has opened my mind to new things and new approaches.

As I say.  Early days yet, and Leo I'm sure will keep an eye on his family.  We also placed Mac and Ross's ashes in pots, one planted with a Rose - Remember Me - a fiery mix of golds like our ginger babies, and one with a native broadleaf oak which I grew from an acorn. 

Thinking of you.   :hug: :hug:


« Last Edit: August 14, 2018, 07:46:31 AM by Sue P (Paddysmum) »

Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #41 on: August 14, 2018, 03:19:00 AM »
My lovely Trouble, who I had had from birth due to a miscalculation on my part, was PTS just before Christmas coming up 4 years ago is buried in the garden with a lovely white Rosa Rugosa Alba on top of him. I still miss him like crazy, but it DOES get better with time. It is a comfort seeing his rose. He was 18.

I would suggest not throwing his things away, sooner or later, possibly sooner given the age of Robyn, you may consider another cat. It will never replace Leo, but although some cats are very special to us, your heart expands to love another.

Thinking of you both.

Paula xxx
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Offline Kay and Penny

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #40 on: August 14, 2018, 00:11:17 AM »
there's lots to choose out there Lisa - this is just one site https://www.legendurn.co.uk/pet-cremation-funeral-urns.html

you and Robyn will I think find some relief from your grief in spending time together planning a final send off for Leo - perhaps choosing a special plant too - it's only a brief distraction but as time goes by you will find comfort in doing it properly, and will have photos too to look at
Robert A. Heinlein:
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Offline lisa77

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #39 on: August 13, 2018, 22:11:50 PM »
Does anyone know if I can buy my own urn or do I have to choose one from the vets?

X

Offline lisa77

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #38 on: August 13, 2018, 21:40:33 PM »
Thanks so much everyone.

A zillion things are going round in my head.
All the if's & buts & what if's.

For the past 2 weeks his water fountain, syringes, litter tray, bowls of water all over the house, his meds, were our life line. Now they mean absolutely nothing because he's not here anymore.

I am trying to hold it together for my daughter Robyn but we always called Leo her brother as Robyn was our IVF miracle & we couldn't have anymore.

I'm sorry, I'm rambling..

Just in total shock still I think. I can still smell him. I keep finding his hair on my clothes. I miss him so much 😭😭😭😭






Offline Sootyca

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #37 on: August 13, 2018, 20:45:25 PM »
Thanks so much ladies.

I just knew by his eyes this morning. Just fixated and pupils huge in the day light. The vet said the sedative could take 10 mins but he was 0ut in a flash which makes me feel like he was past fighting.

I feel so sick and keep thinking I am actually going to be sick. We went through so much together and he absolutely hated anyone else until my daughter was born and for such a fiesty cat, he accepted her and they had a strong bond.

Our while family dynamic changes now  :'(

So sorry Lisa.   :hug: :hug: I know words won't help but you gave him the greatest, most selfless gift you could - you let him go before he suffered.  Take the time to grieve.

RIP Leo.

Offline Misa

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #36 on: August 13, 2018, 20:39:49 PM »
I AM SO SORRY LISA, RIP LEO PLAY HARD O HE BRIDGE

I FIND IT VERY HARD TO CRY BUT THIS HAS REDUCED ME TO TEARS  SUCH A VERY HARD TIME YOU HAVE HAD BUT LEO KNEW HE WAS LOVED VERY SPECIALLY

THINKING OF OU AND YOUR FAMILY

Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #35 on: August 13, 2018, 15:45:40 PM »


Oh Lisa.  I'm gutted for you all. 

It's devastating when you lose a loved one like this.  It doesn't matter how young or old they are, it's always too soon. 

Such companionship is a real gift. 

The thing to hang on to is that Leo was loved and treasured, and he loved and treasured his special family a hundredfold in return.  It won't ease the pain you're feeling, we know that.  If only there was something we could take for it, but there never is.  My heart goes out to you.   :hug: :hug:

Another bright strand to the Rainbow.  Fare well, Leo. 




Offline lisa77

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #34 on: August 13, 2018, 15:29:25 PM »
Thanks so much ladies.

I just knew by his eyes this morning. Just fixated and pupils huge in the day light. The vet said the sedative could take 10 mins but he was 0ut in a flash which makes me feel like he was past fighting.

I feel so sick and keep thinking I am actually going to be sick. We went through so much together and he absolutely hated anyone else until my daughter was born and for such a fiesty cat, he accepted her and they had a strong bond.

Our while family dynamic changes now  :'(

Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #33 on: August 13, 2018, 15:19:38 PM »
Honey, I am so sorry you had to let Leo go, it was for the best for him if he was in distress. :hug: :hug: :hug: You know your own babe best. I am so sorry for you and your Daughter. :care: :care: :care: Please look after yourselves as you grieve.

Play hard on Rainbow Bridge Leo. :blow kiss:
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Offline jezebel

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #32 on: August 13, 2018, 15:03:12 PM »
So sorry to hear he's gone, but you made the hardest and bravest decision.


Play hard at the Bridge, Leo, you'll be missed.
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Offline dawnf

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #31 on: August 13, 2018, 14:22:49 PM »
I'm so sorry to hear this, I'm sure I remember him as a baby.  I think we know our own cats best  :hug:

Offline lisa77

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #30 on: August 13, 2018, 14:04:49 PM »
Thank you ladies. My big beautiful lion is now at peace. I called the vet back and glad I did as when he arrived he said how much more jaundice he was. He was pts at home and was given a sedative before hand.

I will miss my best mate of 11 yrs. The house is already so strange without him and I feel like my heart has been ripped out. We have just had to tell my 5yr old daughter and she hasn't taken it very well.

Thank you for everyone that responded. I really appreciate it x

Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #29 on: August 13, 2018, 12:48:28 PM »


Thinking of you Lisa, and hope your day isn't going as badly as you initially felt.   :hug:  Topping up the positive vibes for Leo.



Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #28 on: August 13, 2018, 08:46:41 AM »
Just to say I think Sue is probably right, I hope you don't get into too much trouble at work. :hug: :hug: :hug:
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Offline Desley (booktigger)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #27 on: August 13, 2018, 08:01:05 AM »
Just a quick post to echo Sues thoughts, it is so hard watching them struggle but it your vet thinks a change in meds could help, I'd do it,especially as he is still eating and drinking - I was told mine wouldn't be in pain, just feel like they had a hangover
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Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #26 on: August 13, 2018, 07:47:14 AM »


Lisa, he's feeling pretty low, but with a disease which affects the liver and gall ducts, that's to be expected.  If he wasn't eating or drinking, I'd be more inclined to agree it may be time to let him go, but I think it's worth letting the vet take a look, and see what they think.  It was just yesterday when he was more relaxed and rolled over to show you his moggnifikatt tummy.  With an illness like this, it would seem likely he'll have good days and bad days, and it isn't going to heal overnight. 

It's easy for me to say, but believe me, I'm not trying to judge.  Any decision you take will have Leo's welfare at its very heart.  Just I can see that this is tearing you apart, and when you're right in the thick of a situation like this, it's easy to lose yourself in the anxiety of seeing your lovely little lad in pain.  A change of meds may be worth the attempt. 



Offline lisa77

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #25 on: August 13, 2018, 07:20:48 AM »
They just said cholangiohepatitis. Vet said he had a blockage in his gallbladder.  he is still very jaundice, even after 2 weeks of drinking good amounts and eating. X

Offline lisa77

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #24 on: August 13, 2018, 07:15:32 AM »
I understand what you are saying. He is still sat outside in his fave spot. He is very shaky and he feels cold I attempted to pick him up and bring him into the house but he howled at me so he is still there. I definitely think it's time. His eyes are so dilated even in the daylight. He looks wired.  :'(

Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #23 on: August 13, 2018, 07:11:24 AM »


Lisa, maybe take a steps back from any decision making just this instant.  You're clearly upset, and very worried, and it's understandable when Leo has been sick.  Have they said which type of this illness he has?  I've been reading up on it, and it appears to take one of two forms, one of which will often respond to treatment very well.  I ask because I wonder if this is what your vet is contemplating?  It's so hard for us when we're faced with a very sick cat, to know what to do for the best.  We love our cats, and because of that we don't want to see them suffer.  But it can also lead us to panic and pre-judge a situation. 

I would perhaps caution "wait and see" for today, and have another chat with your vet.  Worrying about work isn't helping this situation, and it's difficult tot hink straight when you have so much on your mind.   :hug: :hug:

Me, Moray, Malt & Barley are all sending uber-strengff snoozles and soothing vibes for Leo.   :hug: :hug:  :hug: :hug:




Offline lisa77

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #22 on: August 13, 2018, 03:29:44 AM »
Just been on the phone to the vet again as Leo woke us up being sick and I'm pretty sure that there were little blood clots in it. He said he thinks it's probably the steroids that have given him internal ulcers. He looked awful after  he'd been sick and I thought he was going to die there and then  He got up 5 mins later and sat by patio door so I have let him in the garden an he is sitting in our beach tent we have. Vet was talking about changing his meds. I am not sure I want to do this. I hate to see him like this but the vet (after all that's hapened) seemed to sound surprised when I said I wasn't keen on this idea. I have no clue as to how work are going to react now. I am due back tomorrow. I've had the last 2 week's off with him and 1 of those days was unpaid as I have no holiday left. I'm dreading letting them know I won't be in tomorrow.
I think as soon as 9am comes I am going to call the vet out and end his misery. I seriously cannot see him ever getting through this  :'(

Offline Misa

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #21 on: August 12, 2018, 22:59:35 PM »
SORRY ONLY JUST SEEN THIS AND CAN ONLY ECHO ALL THE GOOD ADVICE

MY LATE NAPOLEON HATED BEING IN THE VETS BUT WAS VERY ILL BUT PULLED OUT ALL LEADS AND STUFF BUT IB A PREVOIUS VET HE TRADHED HIS CAGE COMPLETLEY.

THEY LEFT IT SO I COULD SEE WHST HE HAD DONE AND COULD HEAR HIM SHOUTING AS I ENTERED THE VETS.

HE LIVED FOR A LONG TIME AFTER THAT BUT ALWAYS REGRETTED TAKING HIM BACK TO STAY AT VETS

GO WITH YOUR HEAD AND TRY AND STAY CALM, LISTEN TO YOUR VETS ADVICE AND WHILE HE SEEMS HAPPY AT HOME AND OK THEN I AM SURE HE IS

GOOD LUCK, SUCH A HARD PLACE TO BE

Offline lisa77

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #20 on: August 12, 2018, 20:42:45 PM »
Thanks everyone  :hug:

Offline Sue P (Paddysmum)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #19 on: August 12, 2018, 20:29:43 PM »


I certainly do pray your Monday goes quickly.  Love to Leo xxx.  :hug:



Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #18 on: August 12, 2018, 20:01:59 PM »
They most certainly are and ungrateful. >:(

BTW, several of us have eyesight probs hence why I and several others use a larger font size. Getting on a bit, some more than others. :naughty:
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Offline lisa77

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #17 on: August 12, 2018, 19:42:05 PM »
Thank you

I dread Mondays!
Some people are so horrible arnt they!

Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #16 on: August 12, 2018, 19:36:45 PM »
My thoughts are with you, I also work in a contact centre and share your pain. :hug: :hug: :hug: Leo is a beautiful cat. :Luv:
Oscar Wilde on his adored Mog "The Mighty Atom that purrs and furrs"

Offline lisa77

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #15 on: August 12, 2018, 19:30:35 PM »
Thanks ladies. I have been writing everything down since he came home from vet 2 wks ago. He is usually a very feisty cat who only really tolerates me and my 5yr old daughter. He isn't overly friendly to anyone else & has a bad reputation for his attitude but we love him and wouldn't have him any other way... I long for that fiesty  boy back  :'(

Its horrible when anywhere other than their own environment stresses them out to the point where you have to bring them home isn't it. He needed to stay on those drips but it's too much for him.

 He just rolled over and showed me his lovely belly which is more like him. It's just a rollercoaster of emotions. He was my baby when I couldn't conceive naturally and never thought we would afford ivf. I feel so stressed having to go back to work tomorrow and leaving him as I've been out about 3 times in last 2 wks. I will dash straight home at lunch.
I work in a contact centre and it's stress stress, abuse, swearing, and more stress.. about 90 calls like that on a Monday  :shocked:

Pray my day goes quickly  :thanks:


Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: Is it time to let my baby go?
« Reply #14 on: August 12, 2018, 19:02:56 PM »
I agree with Karen, keep a diary, otherwise it's hard to keep track of how much is eaten, any loose/hard stools etc.
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