Author Topic: How to say no. How to kow what to do............  (Read 2423 times)

Offline Dawn F

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #18 on: June 25, 2009, 11:58:20 AM »
I agree that your way with words is wonderful - I'd pay to read it

Offline Kay and Penny

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #17 on: June 24, 2009, 00:51:52 AM »
I guess the survival instincts of animals are far superior to ours - look at the animals which survive through arctic and antartic winters - the stoicism of the Emperor penguins is truly awe-inspiring

food is so important - keeping up the bodily temperature, allowing the cats to hunker down during the night instead of having to go off hunting, allowing them to deposit fat to help keep out the cold - and then there is the psychological benefits of not being hungry - do cats have a psychology?  - I would like to think so
Robert A. Heinlein:
How you behave toward cats here below determines your status in Heaven.

Dark Moon

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #16 on: June 24, 2009, 00:43:41 AM »
Thanks trigger.

They do have tons of stuff out there. I also have hay bales around and they have burrowed into them. But when it hits the -50s, I just don't think all the 'stuff' or hay bales are enough.

Yet Jasper survived it all. As did Bogs. And Ozzie. And Edgar. And and and and.......... 

As for writing, I have been told that's what I should do since I was a child. But, you know, I just don't believe it. I don't have the imagination to create stories. And most folks wouldn't care to read what I write. And no publisher would pay for it. I just write what I think and feel and send it to those I think might enjoy and feel too. It's enough for me.

Thank you too for remembering my coyote. She haunts me still. I try at least to think that I let her have a bit less pain by filling her tummy. But darn, you know....

Dark Moon

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #15 on: June 24, 2009, 00:35:58 AM »
Thanks fr that Judecat. I believe that. But when I see and know how many, many need help ...

As for me, I live in Canada. My opinion only, of course, but to me it is THE best country in the world. People dismiss us and take us for granted. They shouldn't. As we have proven over and over when the time has come. And in Canada, I live on the Prairies. I started in the Maritimes (Nova Scotia - a perfectly gorgeous place); spent my undergraduate years in Montreal (Quebec - oh! The culture!!!!). Have spent odd moments in Ontario, Alberta and New Brunswick. But landed here, in Manitoba.

MB is like me. No middle of the road. Is a province of extreme cold. Except when it flips instantly into the extreme hot. I guess that's why I love her. She is or she isn't. No guessing. Severe has its beauty too, you know.  I hate winter, yet there is little as lovely as a winter day; the snow (hard, crystalline, and so blue. Yes, blue). The sun shining so brilliantly it blinds. The sun dogs hanging in the sky.

And, speaking of the sky - it goes on forever. Huge and blue and perfect. And, at night, adorned with so many thousands and thousands of stars. Most people never even see.....  And, of course, the lights.  Blackcat will have to tell us if the southern lights are as wonderful. But I'll put my money on our Northern Lights any time.

Sorry - you likely didn't want to hear all of this.

But that's where I am. And, maybe, a bit of why I am.

Offline Kay and Penny

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #14 on: June 24, 2009, 00:27:46 AM »
DM - I wonder if you could lay your hands on a heap of second hand duvets, and pop them in the garage folded up - they would give a number of shadows a cosy bed away from draughts and the sight of other shadows

as for finance, you have a wonderful way with words, and I love your description of the cats, and the poor coyote too I remember

have you thought of putting it into a book, or seeing if a newspaper would give you a weekly column? I would pay good money to read anything written by you
Robert A. Heinlein:
How you behave toward cats here below determines your status in Heaven.

Offline Judecat (Paula)

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #13 on: June 24, 2009, 00:02:11 AM »
Sorry, I don't know what area/continent you live in. My local Rescue says on their calenders every year, quote "Saving one animal won't change the world, but you have made the world of difference to that one animal." Very true and you have made the world a different place to 19. Well done you!
Oscar Wilde on his adored Mog "The Mighty Atom that purrs and furrs"

Dark Moon

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #12 on: June 23, 2009, 21:13:15 PM »
Thanks BC. I'll take whatever rain you can send.

We have gone from winter (2 weeks ago I was still in layers and cold even so!) to hot and dry, dry, dry. Dug in a plant a couple of days ago. Dug down 6-8 inches and no sign of moisture of any kind.

My sister wonders why I live here. What I could possibly see... Oh well, for whatever reason I do love it. Admittedly, sometimes more than others....

31 today and winds of 60 kmh. The plants are all wilting. My 'lawn' is already in its usual late July state - i.e. crispy and brown. That actually doesn't bother me as I don't much like grass. The silly stuff grows and you just have to mow it, after all! But the kitties hate wind. Love the heat. But hate the wind (ruffles the fur, don't ya know!).  Oh well, still far, FAR better than the freezing cold and snow.

But that rain - please send it. We need it and would welcome it!

Offline blackcat

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #11 on: June 23, 2009, 20:48:31 PM »
I'll see if I can send a little rain you way DM - We seem to be taking the 'warm, wet winter' description a bit far at the moment -

Dark Moon

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #10 on: June 23, 2009, 15:06:00 PM »
"The summer is here, the weather is good and you can help "him" now, you can make his life a little easier now - even that makes a difference to "him" - take one day at a time and I often find things will work themselves our for the future on their own in mysterious ways."

Thanks. That did finally occur to me... i.e. I don't have to worry right this moment. Summer is here (finally) and they not only will be fine outside, they no doubt prefer it. I actually feel a little guilty about depriving Jasper of the summer - but I have to take the opportunities when they present themselves! For now I'll just continue to put the food and water out. They all know where the food is, and know they can run to the garage for safety and protection from the rain (assuming we ever get any!)  so for now they'll be fine. I'll deal with the winter when the time comes.

Offline LesleyW

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #9 on: June 23, 2009, 14:21:58 PM »
Hi Millys Mum.

I have 19.

And counting.......


I have been trying to tell myself for 30+ years now that I cannot save the Universe. That what little I do makes no damn (can you say that here?) difference at all. But then this little voice in my head says that it makes a difference to that one......

DM  It has made a difference to all 19 and and to those that have gone before the 19, of which I am sure there are many.  I started with a couple and now have 36 but I still feel guilty and bad when I have to say to people "sorry I am full".  They don't believe you, they think you are making it up, they think you have a personal dislike to them.  The truth is sometimes you have to say no,  but as Blackcat says a line in the sand can change and what I do is when I have space I take them, when I don't I can't.  I cannot say I will never help another cat, I don't have room - sadly the room will become available sometime due to the loss of one my precious babies - and at that time I can help again.

The one person you DO have to help is yourself.  If you yourself become over-burdened either financially or emotionally, you can help none.

The summer is here, the weather is good and you can help "him" now, you can make his life a little easier now - even that makes a difference to "him" - take one day at a time and I often find things will work themselves our for the future on their own in mysterious ways.

 :hug: :hug:
Even the smallest feline is a masterpiece (Leonardo da Vinci)

Offline Bazsmum

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #8 on: June 23, 2009, 09:41:12 AM »
I have been trying to tell myself for 30+ years now that I cannot save the Universe. That what little I do makes no damn (can you say that here?) difference at all. But then this little voice in my head says that it makes a difference to that one......

...and to everyone you have helped DM!  :Luv: :hug:

Cats are clever beings, they know most danger and manage to steer clear, to them you are quite the opposite...You are doing what most people would turn a blind eye too, you have heart DM, concience and most of all kindness in abundance!

I know its no help at the moment but I do believe our after-life depends on our doings on Earth...For you there will be no St Peter at the gate, the gate will be wide open!  :Luv: :hug:

No you cant save the Universe DM and to try would only end in tears! But as Milly'sMum say's "you have saved a small universe yourself" and that I believe to be true....

When bad things happen everyone knows about it, Good deeds seem to go unnoticed....We notice DM....And many a cat past, present and future know too!  :Luv: :hug:

I wish you financial happiness to ease your hardship that eases others too!  ;)

Offline blackcat

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #7 on: June 23, 2009, 09:15:07 AM »
DM, we all reach a line in the sand that says stop and go no farther. The good thing about sand is that it moves around a lot and lines can get rubbed out. You do a wonderful thing for all of your babies and for the poor lost wild things too. Do not in any way beat yourself up - you do good stuff!! And 'he' found you because as you say, there is a light over your door that says to all cats - here is a friend.

Being a friend is a wonderful thing ... :hug:

Offline Dawn F

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #6 on: June 23, 2009, 08:41:49 AM »
oh dm it is a real dilemma for you - at least here if we have snow it is a passing thing but I know your winter just goes on and on - I don't have any answers I'm afraid I suppose we are all financially bound at the end of the day but a little food and the garage for some shelter is so much more than they already have - like mm said saving 19 is a pretty good effort

Dark Moon

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #5 on: June 22, 2009, 20:11:34 PM »
ah, but you know, people laugh at folks like me. Caricatures, we are. The crazy cat ladies...  Yet, when they have a cat in need, or a litter of (for them) unwanted kittens, or some such - suddenly 'we' become somewhat less crazy and somewhat more important.

As for those I have 'saved' - guess you might have to ask them. I suspect some don't feel all that 'saved'.




Offline Millys Mum

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #4 on: June 22, 2009, 19:51:03 PM »
19  :wow: you have done a good job saving a little part of the universe  ;D


Dark Moon

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #3 on: June 22, 2009, 19:25:22 PM »
Hi Millys Mum.

I have 19.

And counting.......

My garage is always open a crack - to give them a place to flee, should they need to. And  a place to hunker down, when they want to.

I have food and water always available.

As for neutering - that assumes I can catch them. I have done such. Bogs and Ozzie were the latest. Jasper I didn't catch. He made the 'mistake' of running into the house. And I shut the door. The vet techs have the wounds..........

Almost all of mine have come as strays. Have told people that I must have some sign only cats can read on my house. Says something like: In trouble? Need help? Come here!

Which is still what I think and believe.

But, you know....   

Summer is fine. But winter??????????  I wound not have any living  being out there. And yet I do not know how to, or even if to, get them in. Sadly, there is the financial thing too....

I have been trying to tell myself for 30+ years now that I cannot save the Universe. That what little I do makes no damn (can you say that here?) difference at all. But then this little voice in my head says that it makes a difference to that one......

Offline Millys Mum

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Re: How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #2 on: June 22, 2009, 19:08:17 PM »
Its hard isnt it  :( all these nomadic cats seem to know where to go. Obviously you have your limits, could you get a reasonable sized shed and make that into a decent shelter for winter use? If you can neuter, feed and offer somewhere for winter then thats giving them a good chance.
How many do you have now?  :scared:


Dark Moon

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How to say no. How to kow what to do............
« Reply #1 on: June 22, 2009, 18:59:06 PM »
You know of Jasper.  And maybe you know of Shadow too. For those whose don't, Jasper is in, Shadow isn't. Yet.

But it seems you get one in and another comes. Now there is this other fellow (always boys. What I wouldn't give for a little girl!). Saw him first time last week. Saw him today.  Big boy and scarred. No ears  (that's what happens here. They freeze...). A recent wound under his left 'ear'.  Sitting there the edge of the yard (my yard is likely larger than most. He would have been easily 4- to 500 feet away).

My 'big boys' have been worried of late. Both came in last night (rare thing) and have been hovering since.I assume (now) because of him.

Saw 'him' early this  morning at the edge. Watched Simon walk (tail straight up. We all know what that means!) toward him. I banged on the window, hoping to curtail the inevitable fight. They both ignored me. But... Simon got to him, they touched noses, and 'he' turned. Didn't go far, but didn't fight.

So............  (sorry, long story.......)

Later this morning there 'he' was again. This time by the lilacs. Again about 2- to 300 yards away. Just lying there. Watching. Likely wanting food (I keep bowls of food and water on the porch). Seemed enchanted with Molly-Molly. Who eventually acknowledged his existence and looked at him (and, yes, all mine are spayed and  neutered, so that wasn't what either of them were after...)  I was sitting on the steps and he saw me, but didn't seem to care. Saw Simon coming up on him from behind and thought "oh gee - here we go." but nothing happened. Simon sniffed him and  'he' leaped up about a foot (being surprised) and that was that. Simon came in and 'he' went back to watching us. Then I did what I knew was wrong - got up, came in, got him food, and went out. He saw me upright and fled.

He'll be back.

Worried about Shadow because I hadn't seen him today. But he came through a while ago for food. So he's o.k.

BUT - the point ( FINALLY you say!!!)  what do I do?  I can't save them all. I can give them food and a safe place. But winter? Don't tell me about rescues and all. They are few and far between here, and overwhelmed as it is.

So... Jasper is in. Shadow is around. And now there is 'he'. And should I manage to haul either Shadow or 'he' in, there will be another come..........

?

 


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