Purrs In Our Hearts - Cat Forum UK

Cat General => General Cat Chat => Topic started by: Stuart on July 30, 2012, 04:11:50 AM

Title: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Stuart on July 30, 2012, 04:11:50 AM
I know we have Robbie now, but to be honest He is pretty happy doing his own thing, sometimes it feel's
as tho we don't even have a furbabe  :shocked: if He isn't out galavanting somewhere, he is sleeping
Upstairs, only time you really see/feel his presance is if he is wanting food, He doesn't come into the living room
when we are there?? don't know if that's because it has a wooden floor?? I don't even know why I am posting this?
but maybe it's because I just can't stop thinking about Olivia and the way she left us  :(

I still feel it was the vet's that gave her an overdose, because the symptoms of which are the exact same as what was wrong with Her the day after :'(


Q: What are the symptoms of a diazepam overdose?

A: Diazepam (Valium) is an anxiolytic sedative classified as a benzodiazepine. Diazepam is indicated for the management of anxiety disorders, for the symptomatic relief in acute alcohol withdrawal and as an adjunctive treatment for the relief of skeletal muscle spasms. Diazepam may also be used as an adjunctive therapy for convulsive disorders. The most common symptoms of a diazepam overdose include drowsiness, excessive sedation, ataxia, confusion and reduced reflexes. A diazepam overdose rarely causes coma and very rarely causes death.

The 3 vet's that looked at Olivia at the time all said they had no idea what was wrong with her?? one did suggest putting her on a drip for a couple of hours
to see if she would pick up, but the older vet there doubted that, that would help and basically advised euthanization

I kinda knew this would happen, I mean you never forget them do you

I Guess I just Really Miss our wee sweetie  :'( :'(


edit; I can still see the vet nurse placing her on the weighing scales while she was still in her carrier, the carrier itself weighed 5kg

Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Rosella moggy on July 30, 2012, 07:52:52 AM
I have lost two cats in very upsetting circumstances.  One in April 2006 and one in November 1987.

I haven't forgotten but I torture myself a little less with the memory each passing year Stuart and concentrate more on happier times.  Nothing can bring the lovely Olivia back  :( :hug: 

Just as a comment, our vet/VNs usually weigh ours in the basket and then weigh the basket on it's own as the weighing machine is in a different room and they don't want any escapees.  Surely it would be blindingly obvious to anyone, let alone a vet/VN, if the weight of a cat was incorrect by 5kgs  :-:

I hope Robbie will learn to be more of a lap cat in time  :hug: :hug: :hug:  I hope the same with our Grouchie lad too  :shify:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Sue P (Paddysmum) on July 30, 2012, 08:00:40 AM



Stuart.   :hug: :hug:  I know.  :hug:

Am also hoping in time Robbie will become more "available."

It's hard when loss is still very fresh.   :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: bunglycat on July 30, 2012, 14:26:59 PM
 :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
Know the feeling , I can't stop thinking about Smartie , I know his case was different , but he was the love of my life .
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Dawn F on July 30, 2012, 15:08:22 PM
Stuart, am really sorry to hear this, like Rosella my vet weigh in the basket first - in a way maybe Robbie's way of life is just what you need at the moment with Marissa at the age she is a friend of mine is really struggling to keep pets and six month old baby happy and feels guilty about everyone  :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Tiggy's Mum on July 30, 2012, 18:46:49 PM
Nothing I can say that will help I'm afraid, just wanted to send you a  :hug: :hug: :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: maryas on July 31, 2012, 00:21:20 AM
Hamish, Misty and Olivia were all gorgeous cats that you loved so so much Stuart and you lost them so close to each other.  We all beat ourselves up about things we might have/should have/could have done and it's just a waste of time.

They had a great time with you and you will miss them for a long long time but eventually it'll get easier to talk and laugh about them and the things they got up to with you.

One day Robbie will realise you need hugs from him and we all want to see the photo when he does  :hug:

Mary 
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Stuart on July 31, 2012, 00:39:32 AM
Thanks for being there for me guy's, I was just feeling really Low being stuck out here :(
Olivia has been the only Furbabe we have had that would come running if you shouted her name
she was one very special Lady

Just want to thank you all, reading your reply's has helped me to strengthen up a bit again  :shy:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: maryas on July 31, 2012, 00:44:02 AM
It's great that we are here for each other Stuart cos we all understand  :hug:

Mary
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Stuart on July 31, 2012, 01:01:00 AM
Exactly!! Mary  :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: clarenmax on July 31, 2012, 08:34:44 AM
Just wanted to add some  :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: xx
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: JackSpratt on July 31, 2012, 14:52:15 PM
Stuart, they're all so different - of course you'll miss Olivia. :care: It's on no way a reflection regarding your feelings towards Robbie....he's a very different personality. :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: pappilon on July 31, 2012, 16:53:45 PM
Aww Stuart :hug: :hug: Mister was exactly as you described Robbie, some cats just enjoy doing thier own things i guess! When he was inside he wouldnt even sit in the same room as me now am wondering if it is the wood floor or being a young male cat doing what boys do,  i loved him for who he was and now that he is gone i miss him soooo much :) Robbie sounds so like Mister but i think one day he will surprise you  :hug: :hug:
After two months i am still torturing my self thinking that the vet shouldnt have operated on him so soon after the RTA and giving him anesthetic a day before to try and put his hip back i did tell him about my concern but he said he would be fine. i agree with Mary we all beat ourselves with if,s and should/ could have done and it is waste of time but then it cant be helped and some days are worse than others but with time it gets easier it does. If only they knew how much we love them.
Sending you  :hug: :hug: :hug:
Pav
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Liz on July 31, 2012, 22:52:15 PM
Stuart  :hug:

We love them for who they are and miss them forever, even with our losses each dynamic changes the group, their presence is missed and the what ifs are always in the back of our minds

All I can say is it does get easier and know we lost Sweetie the same time you lost Olivia makes this thread very bitter sweet, we so very nearly met at the Pet Crematorium with our darling girls :hug: :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Gillian Harvey on August 01, 2012, 13:47:59 PM
 :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Stuart on August 01, 2012, 21:18:47 PM
Thanks for all your replys of support guy's they are Most appreciated  :shy:

I really think the way that they leave us determines how long to get to acceptance level if you know what I mean

I still get upset with what happened with Hamish because I never noticed he was ill  :(
and with Olivia, it still feel's so unfair with what happened to her
My First Furbabe Misty, I feel had a very good long life, and all the proper decisions were made when he was diagnosed
with the cancer

but the bottom line is, you never forget them, And I'm still glad to be part of this lovely forum where you can rely on
wonderful understanding like minded folks to help you through these low times

 :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: sheryl on August 01, 2012, 21:34:43 PM
Sending lots of  :hug: your way Hun xxx

We think about them and all the "what ifs" because they are such a huge part of our lives and we love them so much xxx
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Sue P (Paddysmum) on August 02, 2012, 07:24:58 AM



You're so right Stuart.  As with Misty, when we lost Paddy I was heartbroken, but I also knew that at 20+ it was inevitable, and he'd had a good long and happy life with us.  With Mac it was dreadful because he was so young, and had everything to live for.  The manner of his death was so violent, and that's what makes it all so hard to come to terms with.  :( :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: maryas on August 02, 2012, 16:32:12 PM
I really think the way that they leave us determines how long to get to acceptance level if you know what I mean
[/color]

So so true Stuart.

My 1st cat Tibby was 26 yrs old when I took her to the vet to be pts and I knew she was dying at home and it was the right thing to do for her.

However, with Smudge as most of you know he was missing from Sept.4th 2007 and I looked for him every day and cried every day wondering where he was, how he was, what he was eating, where he was sleeping instead of my bed, was he getting his eyes kissed which he loved so much etc. etc.  Then someone spotted him on 14th May 2008 and when I went he was nowhere to be found and the day after someone else saw him but he was dead on the side of the road.  So close and yet so far.  This was a heart breaking 8 months for me and so many ifs, buts and maybes and now every September and May it brings it all back to me, not that I don't think about it every other month too.

I try to think 'what will be will be' and 'everything happens for a reason' but it's so hard sometimes.

If Smudge had not gone missing I wouldn't have come on here and met you lot  :hug:

If Smudge had not gone missing I would not have my beautiful Bonnie  :hug: :Luv2:

We must try and think how happy they all are up on The Bridge and remember the good times we had with them.  :hug:

Mary
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: cazzer on August 02, 2012, 19:08:23 PM
sending  :hug:Stuart x
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: mad_lilli on August 02, 2012, 19:59:05 PM
 :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: Stuart. I can only echo what Mary said - I joined this forum when Cooper went missing and rarely miss a day looking in to see how everyone is. When anyone loses a furbaby, I think we all feel it and it makes the ones at home just that bit more precious. Olivia was a beautiful girl and her affectionate ways surely left a gaping hole - Robbie sounds like my Teddy - a bit of a boy about town!! Although he does very occasionally come for fusses and a comb. Cooper was my cuddly boy - always came running when called and asked to be picked up. I still miss him every day. But my girls and Teddy the piddler give me a lot to smile about - Robbie will do the same for you. XXX
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: funkiechicken on August 12, 2012, 04:54:55 AM
Just sending you some hugs Stuart  :hug: :hug:

Its a very normal thing to go through and everyone has to go through the coulda, woulda, shoulda  :'(
In 2 months it will be a year since Tazi went and I am dreading it  :'( :'( I still cry for him and when i cheekily smoke out the spare room window on a night time, i still look for him, because he was always nearby. I feel guilty i didnt realise how ill he was, i feel guilty and angry because had i picked up on symptoms over even, the last 2 years, i think it might have extended his time - i have self diagnosed him with umpteen ailments it could of been. I feel angry i never came home at my usual time that day and angry that when i went looking for him i didnt even go to the side of the estate he'd took himself. I feel guilty he lay in the spot he chose 2 days before i found him and angry he left me  :'(
I had Nuggie already and now have Peanut & Evie (people may say in fit of neediness  :shy:) I found it hard to connect to Peanut at first and it was probably more to do with him being very such like Tazi in character. He made my heart ache more. Eventually I just saw him for what he was - himself. I do make similarities still, but with more fondness that sadness, but ultimately Peanut is loved for being him. Evie is my crazy lady and nice to have some "youth" back in the house  :) Nuggie is my connection to the Tazi Times and I know when he goes I'll really feel it  :shy:

Robbie may surprise you yet. But he may feel your heavy heart and know your not wholly ready to let him in there yet  :hug: but you cant rush things  :hug:

The lady who cremated Tazi said to me - when they are gone, they are at peace. We only grieve for our selfs, because we need to feel the hurt we believe they suffered, But the same as you wouldnt want them to suffer, they wouldnt want you causing your own suffering - and i think shes right. It helps ease some of my issues.

Thinking of you all  :hug: :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Stuart on August 12, 2012, 06:54:35 AM
Thanks FC, It really means a lot to us  :shy:

I've not had a good morning, but I will have to start a new post  :(
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Sue P (Paddysmum) on August 12, 2012, 07:13:14 AM


Stuart  :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: sheilarose on August 13, 2012, 21:45:49 PM
Stuart

I can entirely understand your feelings of loss and injustice. We're here for you.  :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Gill (sneakiefeline) on August 14, 2012, 19:08:26 PM
Like the others I so understand how you are feeling and when Napoleon went to the Bridge just over a year ago, he would have been 19 yesterday, I felt that he had every chance and was so well looked after by tghe vets.

As time went by I started to have doubts and what ifs, I know its part of the grieving process but its taken a long time to happen and I miss him so much.

All my cats have different personalities and after Kocka went to the Bridge I so wanted another lapcat but Misa and Sasa were so traumatized from their bad backgrounds, neither are lapcats and Misa tbh is too big! Sasa has taken 7 yrs to allopw me to stroke her and only on her terms.

Last year I got Lupin and thought he would be a lapcat and he doesnt even like  being stroked unless he wants something, he just uses and abuses me and its heartbreaking cos Napoleon was the ultimate lapcat and snuggler.

I know you will miss Olivia for a very long time and its not helped by Robbie  who sounds like he is a very independent cat but adorable.

Time is the only healer, a lot of time. Purrs is a community where we all understand how you feel  :hug: :hug: :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Stuart on August 14, 2012, 19:47:26 PM
Thank's Guy's  :shy:

Really glad I am still part of this wonderful forum  :)
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: maryas on August 14, 2012, 21:29:23 PM
I'm sure I speak for everyone when I say we are glad you are part of it too.  :hug:

Just take little steps to move on Stuart - we will all get there one day :hug:

Mary
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: alisonandarchie on August 16, 2012, 16:13:54 PM
 :hug: :hug: :hug:
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: Dawn F on August 16, 2012, 16:14:56 PM
totally agree with Mary, we need more cat loving biker boys!
Title: Re: I can't stop thinking about Olivia
Post by: sheilarose on August 16, 2012, 16:30:47 PM
totally agree with Mary, we need more cat loving biker boys!

Yeah Stuart, you got any brothers?  :sneaky: :evillaugh: