Purrs In Our Hearts - Cat Forum UK
Cat General => General Cat Chat => Topic started by: rusticalex on October 17, 2008, 10:35:46 AM
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Hi All
We have a bit of a dilemma, and need to call on the expertise and experience of all you cat lovers!
We have a lovely Norwegian Forest cat of about 11 years old. She is very affectionate and good natured, and likes a quiet life - she actually adopted us about 9 years ago when she preferred our household over her original household which was ‘busy’ with three young boys doing what young boys do!
As it is, we now have children (5 and 3 years old) of our own, and our cat has taken a fair while to adjust to them, preferring for the first 2 or 3 years to stay out of their way, but now being more friendly and accepting of them.
Our dilemma is this. We would like to get our children a kitten each, but are anxious that we could severely put our cat’s nose out of joint and make her life hell. It is difficult because the kids are at an age where having a kitten would do them good, and they could learn a lot from having one. We have contemplated waiting until our cat moves on from this Earth, but she is very healthy and could be around for a long time yet, by which time our kiddies will no longer be young kiddies!
Do you have any suggestions based on your knowledge or experience? If we did get a couple of kittens, should we get boys, girls, or one of each?
Your thoughts please!
Many thanks
Alex
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Please don't take this the wrong way, no offence meant. In my view you should not even be contemplating getting a kitten each for children of 5 and 3. Kittens aren't playthings and most young children will pull them about. Given the nature of your older cat and the time it has taken to adjust to the children why upset it? Just my opinion
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First of all can we have some piccies of your NFC please :Luv:
Secondly why do you think your children having a kitten each would 'do them good' and that they 'could learn a lot from having one'? There is nothing they will learn from a kitten that they won't learn from your current cat. Please don't take offence but I also very much doubt that a reputable breeder or rescue would home kittens to you with these being your reasons for wanting them.
Has your cat ever lived with another cat since leaving her breeders? It's always hard to predict how a cat will react to living in a multicat household if they have not lived in one before (or for 11 years anyway) as some cats just do not like living in multicat houses and others might take a few months to get used to the new cat but then be perfectly happy.
Also some cats might not be overly keen on children but love other cats. One of my boys Pinball had never met children or dogs before I got him and he has since met our neighbours quiet well behaved young children who he's scared of but yet he made friends with a random woofing Alsation at the vets!
Have you thought about what would you do if you introduced a new kitten(s) and after several months your cat was not adjusting to the new addition at all?
Once cats are neutered (the earlier the better) whether they are male or female makes very little difference to their personality but I personally prefer boys.
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Welcome to Purrs.
Obviously others will not agree with me but we are willing to place kittens where there are young children, although I agree that kittens or cats are not play things and need to be adopted for the right reasons. With us it depends on the family as a whole and their attitude. Only very occasionally has a kitten or cat not got on with a resident cat and visa versa, the art is to introduce them properly and not try to rush things.
Having said all that this comes from someone who when she has kittens it reminds her why she doesn't want one.
I would also agree that kittens need to be neutered/spayed as soon as possible.
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Please don't take this the wrong way, no offence meant. In my view you should not even be contemplating getting a kitten each for children of 5 and 3. Kittens aren't playthings and most young children will pull them about. Given the nature of your older cat and the time it has taken to adjust to the children why upset it? Just my opinion
Hi. I understand what you are saying, and no offence taken. I was brought up with cats, having a kitten myself at a young age. My parents were careful to ensure that we treated them with respect and not as toys. Many years later I can reflect that it wasn't having the cat that taught me how to treat animals, but my parents and their guidance that taught me how to respect animals. I would like a similar opportunity for my children, as well as letting them enjoy the simple pleasure, as I did, of getting to know and love a cat, and to grow up alongside it.
First of all can we have some piccies of your NFC please :Luv:
Secondly why do you think your children having a kitten each would 'do them good' and that they 'could learn a lot from having one'? There is nothing they will learn from a kitten that they won't learn from your current cat. Please don't take offence but I also very much doubt that a reputable breeder or rescue would home kittens to you with these being your reasons for wanting them.
Has your cat ever lived with another cat since leaving her breeders? It's always hard to predict how a cat will react to living in a multicat household if they have not lived in one before (or for 11 years anyway) as some cats just do not like living in multicat houses and others might take a few months to get used to the new cat but then be perfectly happy.
Also some cats might not be overly keen on children but love other cats. One of my boys Pinball had never met children or dogs before I got him and he has since met our neighbours quiet well behaved young children who he's scared of but yet he made friends with a random woofing Alsation at the vets!
Have you thought about what would you do if you introduced a new kitten(s) and after several months your cat was not adjusting to the new addition at all?
Once cats are neutered (the earlier the better) whether they are male or female makes very little difference to their personality but I personally prefer boys.
I'll certainly try and oblige with the pics of our cat...she is certainly very beautiful!
Again, no offence taken, and I may have already answered some of your comments up above. I didn't think to say on here, as in my mind I guess I took it for granted, that we would provide any pet with a very comfortable and appropriate home. I certainly feel that any cat would get plenty of good care and love in our household, without any chance of it getting mistreated, albeit without intent by young hands.
For the first three or so years that she was with us her son and daughter lived next door and they were perpetually in and out of our house to see her. She enjoyed playing with her son, but did seem a little threatened by her daughter, being keen to show her who was boss! This has lead us to thinking that if we did get kittens, two boys might be best, from her point of view.
We have considered, as you ask, what we would do if after a few months our existing cat had not got used to the new cats, but without conclusion.
Welcome to Purrs.
Obviously others will not agree with me but we are willing to place kittens where there are young children, although I agree that kittens or cats are not play things and need to be adopted for the right reasons. With us it depends on the family as a whole and their attitude. Only very occasionally has a kitten or cat not got on with a resident cat and visa versa, the art is to introduce them properly and not try to rush things.
Having said all that this comes from someone who when she has kittens it reminds her why she doesn't want one.
I would also agree that kittens need to be neutered/spayed as soon as possible.
Thanks for the greeting, and thanks for your comments. We would certainly do our best and accept guidance to make the situation work.
I agree with kittens being neutered/spayed.
Many thanks to all.
Alex
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:welcome: to Purrs, Alex. Glad you found us!
I have no experience at all of introducing cats, so am of no use to you on that score, but there is a good link which I'll try to find for you.
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Found it!
http://www.catsinternational.org/articles/getting_a_cat/good_introduction.html
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Personally i wouldnt rock the boat if shes the kind of cat that she sounds, at 11 they really do like the quiet life and 2 kittens messing around and causing havoc wouldnt be the nicest thing for her.
Not many mature cats enjoy living with kittens, its more toleration :shy:
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I wouldnt bring kittens into the house as I do not think your cat would like it and like someone else said , why do they need kittens. They grow up to be cats and you have a cat. So they will grow up around a cat and nothing else can be learned from kittens who will be cats a lot quicker than your children will be adults.
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Hi and welcome to Purrs - I think I am inclined to agree with some of the other posters. Your cat has already made her feelings known by adopting you and taking so long to adjust to your children (who I am sure have been raised with a proper respect for cat-kind. The issue here is not whether your children should be introduced to cat ownership by providing them with a kitten, but whether your cat is likely to accept new kittens in the house. She sounds like a cat with very firm views on life, and one who may not be as accepting of new introductions as some can be. I wonder if, since you want a new cat, you might consider a slightly older cat - say around 9 months to a year. Not only would you have the advantage of getting a cat whose personality was already reasonably clear (which you don't get with a kitten who could turn out to be completely unsuitable) but your cat would have a companion who was not constantly chasing her tail (and norwegian forests have such tempting tails) and pouncing on her unexpectedly. It can be very disconcerting for an older cat to have kittens suddenly invading their territory and they can express their feelings in ways that will not be conducive to the sort of hygiene you need to maintain with a 3 year old in the house. Do think long and hard about this one, since, as Team Svartalfheim and others have suggested - and she knows as she has quite a few NFC, your cat may never forgive you!!!
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Having young kids and kittens can drive you insane. My daughter likes to sit and have breakfast with the cats lol :sick: I would not try to upset your already cat, or maybe get a kitten that is a bit older and has settled down already.
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Now I am going to come in and rock the boat a little bit harder :P
Have you thought about fostering a couple of kittens this way your children are getting used to different cats and it teaches them responsibality plus I am sure what ever rescue you contact in your area will take into consideration your own cat and its needs :Luv2:
But please think it through very carefully
Sorry if I am not making much sense have had a lot of nights with little or no sleep :tired:
Please talk with your local rescue and see if you can come up with a plan that fits in with you, your kids and your own Cat. :Luv2:
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Hi,
I only adopt older cats now and really wouldn't get a kitten with an older cat, however it depends on your cat I suppose. Our first 2 cats we had from kittens and 1 of our cats used to play with the feral kitten outside yet our other cat I'm sure would have left home first.