Purrs In Our Hearts - Cat Forum UK
Cat Health & Behaviour => Health & Behaviour General => Topic started by: jezebel on July 06, 2019, 23:01:03 PM
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I'd really appreciate any thoughts or suggestions about this weird thing our new rescue cat does.
Vincent is six and has been with us for five weeks. To begin with, he was very timid but now he's a lot more confident - although he still jumps at strange noises. He's also really affectionate and loving, and loves a fuss.
The problem is, he won't leave our other cat alone. The first time he saw Drum he ran towards her chirruping (a bit like the way mothers call to their kittens). Trouble is, she's completely deaf and can't hear him approaching, so of course he surprises her and makes her jump. She usually hisses and raises a paw. If he doesn't back off, she growls. This doesn't stop him following her around and trying to play and be friends.
That's not the weird behaviour, but it's frustrating and I'm worried she's going to get stressed and ill. Drum's nearly 19 and quite frail - she's tiny compare to Vincent.
The weird behaviour is this: whenever he hears Drum going into the litter tray, he races upstairs to watch her. One time she was peeing, his nose was almost under her tail. :Crazy:
He usually then follows her out and tries to get her attention, which makes her spit and growl and run away. He runs after her.
I would have thought that after a month of being hissed and growled at, he would have got the message but he hasn't.
I feel desperately sorry for him. He obviously wants to be friends and play, but he doesn't understand that she can't hear him, and that creeping up behind her frightens her.
But the litter tray thing is beyond me. This evening, even playtime with his favourite toy (Da Bird) and a fresh bowl of food wasn't enough to distract him.
Any ideas? Has anyone heard of this before?
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Heart Breaking really to know his overtures of friendship aren't reciprocated but understandable given her age and deafness. I havent come across the litter tray behaviour in exactly that manner but something similar used to occur when our visitor cat first began coming. He would wait until one of our cats used the tray, then would roll in the tray. I think he was trying to make himself smell familiar to them to make them more likely to accept his attempts to make friends. I think Vincent may be trying to do something like it though not exactly the same.
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I think part of the problem is he is being a dense male and not picking up on signals! Buster used to like sitting on the covered tray and batting them as they left the tray! It's hard when one wants to be friends and the others don't, I think only time helps, unless you can adopt another cat friendly cat?
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Buster used to like sitting on the covered tray and batting them as they left the tray!
I was going to suggest a covered tray until I read this!
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Sue: that's interesting. Although your experience isn't exactly the same, it might be for the same reason.
Desley: yep, dense male does look likely - he's just a goofy boy who can't take a hint. I'm worried someone will get hurt, though.
I'm going to try some "scent soaking" before I go to bed (that's when goofy boy wakes up and wants to play). Scent soaking is a Jackson Galaxy thing, I think. I'm going to wipe her scent on him so when he goes near her he'll smell better (to her!).
Remind me again why we do this. :Crazy:
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Good idea Jezebel.
Lesley- some cat, Buster. Worra pest. Used to have kids like that at my junior school. They'd ambush new starters in the outside loos. 🙄
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Good idea Jezebel.
Lesley- some cat, Buster. Worra pest. Used to have kids like that at my junior school. They'd ambush new starters in the outside loos. 🙄
Yes, there was a reason he ended up an only cat! His other habit was hiding behind the door to pounce after they had finished and were leaving the kitchen! Ironically he was the one who had litter tray issues
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Sorry Des - predictive type responsible fer yer name change.
Not really too ironic. Having litter tray issues will have made him feel very anxious and territorial about the loos in the house.
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No worries! He was a very territorial cat, fortunately he got better as an only cat
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Just a suggestion, but would you consider another rescue of a similar age? He could play with and accept, probably another female as he wouldn't be so territorial, then maybe he would leave her alone, or perhaps a slightly younger cat that he could play with and wouldn't find to be a threat?
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Would love another cat but just don't have the space. Plus, I think Drum would leave us if we brought home another one!
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Okay, more strangeness from Vincent.
He still won't leave Drum alone, which annoys her, but he follows her everywhere despite her raising her paw to him several times now.
This morning they were both on the stairs when she started howling - she does this when she's about to be sick.
Before she could stain any more of the carpet, I grabbed her and ran upstairs to the bathroom so she could be sick in the sink.
This is the strange bit - Vincent ran after us spitting. He followed us into the bathroom and spat non-stop at me while I was holding Drum over the sink. He even tried to climb up the sink to see what was going on.
He used to spit a lot when we first got him, but now (until this episode, anyway) he only spits if he's spooked by something unfamiliar. He even used to spit at the lady who fed him when he was living in her garden. There's no aggression behind it, he's not in the slightest bit aggressive.
Anyway, eventually I put Drum back on the floor and he stopped spitting but seemed to be really concerned - I hate to humanise animals but that's exactly what it looked like. He sniffed her all over and followed her out the bathroom and down the stairs, sticking close to her.
I've never seen behaviour like this - has anyone else?
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No, I haven't, but given Vincent's background, we don't know what mechanisms he's devised for coping with stressful situations, and I suspect this will have been stressful to him. I don't think you're "humanising" - animals have feelings too, some of them not so very different.
If you think about it, if a member of your family was feeling sick, and another family member grabbed them and rushed them to the bathroom, you'd find it perfectly normal, but a child may not grasp what was going on. Vincent clearly has bonded with Drum, irrespective of whether Drum reciprocates - Vincent wants to be mates with her, and clearly in his feline soul, he identifies with her.
My guess is that spitting is his reaction to stress. It may have been why he spat when he was being fed - he wanted the food, but was nervous about vulnerability whilst feeding. Because its not aggressive spitting, it would make sense that it's potentially induced by stressful situations.
Poor Drum. I do hope she's feeling better. And poor Vincent too. What a lovely lad, in spite of his issues.
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Reminds me of when I was a kid. I adored my sister, who saw me only as a bothersome and unwelcome nuisance. :evillaugh:
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Thanks Sue, that make sense. I know they have feelings - I think Vince has more than most! - but sometimes we're too keen to explain their behaviour in human terms, so I try not to. In this case, it was obvious he was really stressing about Drum. I've never seen anything like it!
Drum is fine - she threw up a massive furball this morning after eating some grass. She was puking several times a week but she's now on medication that's got it down to once or twice a week at most. I thinks it's related to her hyperT. Poor old thing was completely unaware of the fuss Vince was making when she was being sick. Then she hit him later for coming too close. I've had to turf him out of her bed twice today - he never learns.
But he is a sweet lad. I just wish we could get another cat for him!
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I’ve seen similar things with siblings, my neighbours least aggressive semi-feral will lash out at her if she does something to her brother that makes him squeal, its like she goes into mothering mode and wehave to de-flea her first so she runs or she’ll have a go when we do the other two! Not sure if he reacted to her noise, or you running upstairs with her, maybe he thought you were hurting her?
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Well it must have looked alarming - I grabbed her and ran upstairs and then held her over the sink. She usually struggles a bit after she first pukes so he could probably see that and thought I was doing something terrible to her!
I am actually quite impressed by his behaviour. Good job he's not aggressive, otherwise I'd probably be missing an arm by now.
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She usually struggles a bit after she first pukes so he could probably see that and thought I was doing something terrible to her!
That's what I'd suspect, too. He sounds such a lovely young chap, bless him.
Paddy used to throw up a lot with his Hyper-T too.
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Many years ago a friend went on holiday leaving me to feed and medicate her gorgeous grey lump of a boy Noodles ❤ whilst under the protective semi feral glare of his mother Lucy. She went bonkers thinking I was doing something terrible to her boy.
Lovely that Vincent is so protective towards Drum :)