Author Topic: what should i do about spare cat?  (Read 11266 times)

Offline JackSpratt

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #21 on: October 08, 2007, 23:26:16 PM »
Sometimes keeping cats apart can actually do more harm than good.

I have never ever gone for the "keep them apart, use cages etc" method and I have 11 cats.

I PERSONALLY would let them mix, obviously when you are there to keep a close eye and see how it goes

I tend to agree. We had five cats up until February when we lost Parsley. they all came from separate homes and different backgrounds and I think the longest I kept any of them apart was a day. The oldest two I put together pretty much straight away (he was a kitten, she was around 5) and they're the closest out of my mob.

The yawning thing in general is a I'm not threatened/non threatening action as far as I know. (With cats. With people it just generally means I'm bloomin' tired, doesn't it?! ;) ) And yes, the chasing could well be playing too. "Spare cat" might just feel a bit uneven due to only havng one room as Susanne says.




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Offline snarf

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #20 on: October 08, 2007, 23:24:06 PM »
ok im not confused then, we did the scent swapping room thing, kept just doing that, no meeting until lucifer didnt react to the spots shed sat in/ scratched and vice versa- that the right point? he wasnt wopping under the door til  2 weeks ago or so- when hed got used to her smell. they then got to meet through a crack in the door, which got wider. they both try to pull the door open anyway when they were fine about that i opened the door completely- poised with pillow! and theyre happy with that but apparently only for a short period of time, so we go back to gap door again.  :tired: theres no hissing while chasing or wopping- if theyre not hissing, is the chasing thing a play thing like the wopping? am i being overprotective and neurotic?

 
Also spare cat may not want to dominate when she feels she is equal in the house and not shut in one room.

hadnt thought of it like that, tis a good point.

Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #19 on: October 08, 2007, 23:09:48 PM »
Right dont know what you have done so far but the theory is that you get the new cat happy in every room in the house, one by one and while the new cat is in and one room you let the resident cat have the rest of the house to raom and once the resident cat is happy going into the rooms/s where the new cat has been, then you are ready for them to meet for the first time............sounds that they have already met?

Meetings then should be under supervision and unless they are fairly happy and not fighting they should be separated again till the next meeting.

However some cats dont get on but others will tollerate rather than be friends and guess my birmans and Misa/Sasa are in this category.

As long as they are not attacking each other, a bit of hissing and a harmelss wop is OK, then They should be OK. You may find that spare cat becomes the dominent cat but the relationship needs to find its own footing. Also spare cat may not want to dominate when she feels she is equal in the house and not shut in one room.

Offline hannah (weeny)

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #18 on: October 08, 2007, 23:06:08 PM »
she's really gorgeous.  lovely legs  :)

Offline Michelle (furbabystar)

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #17 on: October 08, 2007, 23:05:29 PM »
Sometimes keeping cats apart can actually do more harm than good.

I have never ever gone for the "keep them apart, use cages etc" method and I have 11 cats.

I PERSONALLY would let them mix, obviously when you are there to keep a close eye and see how it goes

Offline snarf

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #16 on: October 08, 2007, 23:01:35 PM »
Yawning is actually a really good sign when done by a cat in the presence of another cat. It's a "look at me, I'm not at all threatening" thing. She is probably feeling threatened by Lucifer. the batting under the door is also a good thing, they are trying to interact in a fairly playful fashion.

Integration can take weeks, months or sometimes days! It mainly depends on how confident the cats in question are - although, obviously there are some who just DON'T like sharing their people!

What is "spare cat" called? Or did you avoid naming her in an attempt not to get attached?

i read that yawning meant "im so not threatened or bothered by you, look how relaxed i am" ?
i do have names in mind for spare if she stays, i didnt want to get attached as i couldnt believe her owners wouldnt appear and im not sure how things will pan out

I think if you are going to keeep spare cat then you need to do the introductions properly and asap.

Go to our links and find wizzs site and it expplains how do introduce two cats  ;D

sorry thats what ive been trying to follow, although apparently not that well  :-[ the scent swapping etc was started from day one, cos i thought i might as well not ignore the metaphorical pink elephant in the spare room from lucifers point of view. so this has been going on for a month, which i know is early days. im just trying to work out whats best for spare as she has the offer of a single cat home (and infact 2 other muti cat homes) and she might not be the right cat for lucifer? can you tell me what im doing wrong, ive probably got confused!



Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #15 on: October 08, 2007, 22:55:57 PM »

Offline pappilon

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #14 on: October 08, 2007, 22:54:25 PM »
I think it helps if you manage somehow to brush the spare cat and then use it on your little guy and same way around and may be with small bedding or towel so they can get used to each other smell before they meet face to face ;), but since they are both young cats i think if you are patient and give it time things works out, they might not become best of friends but they will learn to live and ignore each other OR they may become good friends and learn to share you :)

Offline Susanne (urbantigers)

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #13 on: October 08, 2007, 22:34:13 PM »
I agree that it may just take some time.  It's normal for the resident cat to either hiss or scarper when a new cat is introduced, depending on purrsonalities involved.  It sounds like Spare cat may just be a more dominant and territorial cat than Lucifer, but they may sort things out among themselves given time.  It  may not work out, but how about you consider yourself as fostering Spare cat for a few months and then if things aren't better then you can look for another home for her.  It's not fair on Lucifer to be made unhappy in his own home, but he may just need time to get used to her being around.  And she may just need more time to feel less threatened in her new home.

Have you got some feliway?  If not I recommend getting some of that.  Rescue remedy might help Lucifer too - you can add a few drops of that to his water or dab some behind his ears.  It is supposed to help calm cats.

I'm no expert on introducing cats to each other as Mosi and Jaffa is the only introduction I've had to do, but I would just continue letting them spend some time together when possible, and so long as Lucifer isn't too stressed, and see if things settle down.  A month is a short time when it comes to cat introductions.  Some will get on straight away, but often it can take months.

Offline Gill (sneakiefeline)

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #12 on: October 08, 2007, 22:33:09 PM »
I think if you are going to keeep spare cat then you need to do the introductions properly and asap.

Go to our links and find wizzs site and it expplains how do introduce two cats  ;D

Offline JackSpratt

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #11 on: October 08, 2007, 22:27:35 PM »
Yawning is actually a really good sign when done by a cat in the presence of another cat. It's a "look at me, I'm not at all threatening" thing. She is probably feeling threatened by Lucifer. the batting under the door is also a good thing, they are trying to interact in a fairly playful fashion.

Integration can take weeks, months or sometimes days! It mainly depends on how confident the cats in question are - although, obviously there are some who just DON'T like sharing their people!

What is "spare cat" called? Or did you avoid naming her in an attempt not to get attached?




Carrie, Jack,Toby and Parsley ~ Love and miss you all always.x

Offline Cheesecat

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #10 on: October 08, 2007, 22:20:07 PM »
thank you!
Did cheese and gerties personalities change longterm? or has anyone noticed long term changes in behaviour? i think ive paniced myself abit reading cat confidential!

lucifer is between a year and 18 months. shes prob 6months to a year ish. so similar age. she is stockier tho. and lucifer is a small built softie. even playfighting with his snake he looks camp

lucifer seems to be fine about it all at the moment but i think he might be winding spare cat up, he sits outside her door chirupping and sticking his paws under!

spare cat doesnt bristle, she yawns at him and ignores him and occasionally joins in on the batting under or around the door- am i right to allow them to do this? they dont hiss and both body language is good from what ive read.

its just on the occassions theyve ignored each other  through the gap in the door and the open door so long then when allowed,  lucifer will cautiously enter her room and shell allow it up to a point before chasing him off. or shell chase him down the stairs. so we go back to gap in the door stage
 theyve at points sat ignoring each other about a foot apart, and once stretched noses out to each other to about 6 inches apart which is good. its frustrating tho because when spare is being friendly lucifer spooks and scarpers, and when lucifers being friendly, spare decides he obviously gullible and tries to jumps on his head :-:

Spare is lovely, shes beautiful and very affectionate in a demanding way, id love to keep her but itll be on lucifers agreement  :-[

Cheese has actually gotten more affectionate and her previous mood swings disappeared - she used to always turn on me with no warning and be lovely one minute and biting me on the nose the next (drawing blood  :( ) then we got Gerti who was like a mum to her (think Gerti wanted to mother someone as she had not long been a mum of 2  :) ) after the initial weariness of Cheese - I used to find them curled up together tightly in a cat bed made for one (sooooooo cute!) and yesterday they were asleep infront of the fire in a ying and yang position with paws touching  :Luv: Cheese never turns on me now either, she is a feisty cat but not aggressive and no mood swings  ;D

I know such drastic change wont happen in most cats, but I just wanted to say that sometimes cats can change for the better when another is introduced. When we introduced Doc, Cheese and Gerti became less mother/daughter and now they have their funny little relationships (Gerti and Doc manipulate Cheese for food, Doc and Cheese can gang up on Gerti, Gerti washes Cheese, Cheese washes Gerti but gets offended when Doc washes her....... etc etc  :rofl: )

I think the initial reaction doesnt really show how things will be - not in my opinion, although it is limited! I think it is worth a try though. I think the initial few days/weeks/maybe months can be spent with the cats getting used to their boundaries with each other, who is more assertive, who rules in terms of certain things and then you will know whether they will get on or not long term  ;D
Cheese, Gerti, Doc and Kitty Von Bizmark (Wizzles) ^Lucas^(??/97 - 21/11/07)
To think I might not see those eyes, makes it so hard not to cry, and as we say our long goodbyes, I nearly do.

Offline tez2384

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #9 on: October 08, 2007, 22:16:12 PM »
Not much help really but i have a 1 year old female and last week i got 2 11 week old female kittens to start of with there was lots of hissing and chasing of but as soon as kitty realised they were not taking over (i gave her more attention than i did the kittens) she excepted them she now washes and plays with them.

Hopefully you can keep her shes gorgeous  :Luv:

Offline blackcat

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #8 on: October 08, 2007, 22:00:55 PM »
nope, once my cats get used to a newcomer they are generally back to normal in no time flat. Bob, who had not discovered laps until he moved in with me, stopped using laps and beds when Pavarotti arrived, but he was back into the swing of things in a couple of years. You have to be patient is all ...

Offline snarf

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #7 on: October 08, 2007, 21:55:37 PM »
thank you!
Did cheese and gerties personalities change longterm? or has anyone noticed long term changes in behaviour? i think ive paniced myself abit reading cat confidential!

lucifer is between a year and 18 months. shes prob 6months to a year ish. so similar age. she is stockier tho. and lucifer is a small built softie. even playfighting with his snake he looks camp

lucifer seems to be fine about it all at the moment but i think he might be winding spare cat up, he sits outside her door chirupping and sticking his paws under!

spare cat doesnt bristle, she yawns at him and ignores him and occasionally joins in on the batting under or around the door- am i right to allow them to do this? they dont hiss and both body language is good from what ive read.

its just on the occassions theyve ignored each other  through the gap in the door and the open door so long then when allowed,  lucifer will cautiously enter her room and shell allow it up to a point before chasing him off. or shell chase him down the stairs. so we go back to gap in the door stage
 theyve at points sat ignoring each other about a foot apart, and once stretched noses out to each other to about 6 inches apart which is good. its frustrating tho because when spare is being friendly lucifer spooks and scarpers, and when lucifers being friendly, spare decides he obviously gullible and tries to jumps on his head :-:

Spare is lovely, shes beautiful and very affectionate in a demanding way, id love to keep her but itll be on lucifers agreement  :-[

Offline Cheesecat

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #6 on: October 08, 2007, 21:36:58 PM »
Spare cat is beautiful!!  :Luv:

When we introduced Gerti into our house (with a Cheese already here) Cheese was hissy for a while but now they are friends - Cheese does dominate though!
Then when we introduced Doc, both Cheese and Gerti were a bit hissy at first (I was surprised Gerti hissed too as she is a calm motherly cat)

I think there will mostly always be a bit of hostility from the original cat (or both, or in this case, Spare cat) at first during introductions as they are a bit possessive with their territory and sharing their owners etc but ours settled after not long at all, I think you should try it and see before rehoming Ms Spare  :)
Cheese, Gerti, Doc and Kitty Von Bizmark (Wizzles) ^Lucas^(??/97 - 21/11/07)
To think I might not see those eyes, makes it so hard not to cry, and as we say our long goodbyes, I nearly do.

Offline dolcetta46

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #5 on: October 08, 2007, 21:12:09 PM »
How old is Lucifer, and how old does the spare seems to be?  If they are about the same age or the spare younger than Lucifer, I see a possibility of a happy family with right guidance.  Give it a little more time to see if their relationships improve with a close supervision.  she is a darling it would be a pity if you have to let her go...

Offline Ralph's mum (angie)

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #4 on: October 08, 2007, 21:10:38 PM »
 :Luv: :Luv: :Luv: No advice just wanted to say that she looks a beautiful cat, good luck with everything xx
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Offline JackSpratt

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #3 on: October 08, 2007, 21:03:20 PM »
Oh, she's lovely. :) Hmmm....it can take time sometimes. What's her body language like with regards to Lucifer? Does she bristle?




Carrie, Jack,Toby and Parsley ~ Love and miss you all always.x

Offline ginge66

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Re: what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #2 on: October 08, 2007, 20:55:00 PM »
Hi, just wanted to say what a gorgeous cat she is. :Luv:

Unfortunately I am no expert in cat behaviour but it would be nice if she could stay with you although I understand your concerns.

Goodluck and let us know how things progress :)

Offline snarf

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what should i do about spare cat?
« Reply #1 on: October 08, 2007, 19:46:53 PM »
sorry its so long!

9th of September I took on spare cat ( she was found on the side of a busy major road, by a friend some days before) with the intention of finding her owners.
Pic of spare cat attached (i hope)
I went back in the pet register to the beginning of august and found nothing, im still checking various registers but still nothing. I called all the vets that came up on vetuk for the area she was found, ive been though sams list of advice and I got an article in the paper for her.  She’s a lovely, if demanding, lady. Affectionate and vocal at times. She was wearing a collar when found and had clipped fur from a possible spay.

Its looking unlikely that her owners are going to be found now and Its not fair on her to be in the spare room indefinitely.

If she got on with Lucifer there would be no problem with her staying as ive always intended to have at least 2- if Lucifer will allow it!

Lucifer seems fine about her, he chirps at her door and his body language seems good- tail up, ear forward, whiskers forward etc. 

Spare cat, however, although she will tolerate him being vaguely about for about 10 mins, she reaches a point when shell chase him off- no growl or claws, the occasional small hiss.

That might improve in time I know but im worried that lucifers  temperament will change- hes so loving and playful and confident.  Spare cat is much stockier than him and looks like shes going to continue to grow, Lucifers not got bigger for months and seems to be destined to be a small cat. Im worried that shell always bully him because she knows she can. she doesnt look that big in the pic but she is!

At the moment, if there isn’t a door between them, Lucifer scarpers or completely caves.

I think hes just not as possessive as her. He doesn’t seem to bothered if he see me stroke her through the gap in the door, but she gets immediately aggressive if she sees me stroke Lucifer.

So basically  can this improve? Or is this as good as it gets?

If  I decide to call it a day with spare cat shell still have a home here till she’s rehomed. Ive had a few calls from people offering to take her after the newspaper article. If I contact the CP would they do homechecks?

Am I right in thinking that Lucifer would accept another cat, it just needs to be one that will accept him and be compatible?

any thoughts appreciated

 


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