Purrs In Our Hearts - Cat Forum UK
Cat General => General Cat Chat => Topic started by: Tan on July 10, 2007, 04:58:26 AM
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He' gone.
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Has something happened to Rio? Am hoping and praying I have misinterpreted this... Have sent you a PM :hug:
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I wasn't sure either Helen...
I hope not :(
:hug: to Tan...
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Tan hun, I hope everything is ok
:hug:
I've just noticed the initial posting time, Tan I fear something just devastating has happened hunny..Is there anything we can do :care:
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I hope everythings ok Tan :hug:
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Got my fingers crossed that everything is ok. You know where we all are if you need us. :hug:
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Hope everything is ok?
:hug:
ems
xxxxx
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Tan, hope everything is OK :hug:
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He's gone. rta yest found him at 4am in a bush. went to get him before Dark as usual with Gizzy, got Gizzy but no sign of Rio and he always comes in for his tea and for the night. Kept going out all night and eventually found him. can;t take it it or stop crying.
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Oh hun, I don't know what to say :'( :'(
We'll all be here for you in whatever way we can :hug:
I'm so sorry xxxx
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Oh no Tan :( I am so sorry <massive hugs> Thinking of you xxxx
I stood by your bed last night, I came to have a peep
I could see that you where crying, you found it hard to sleep...
I whined to you softly, as you brushed away a tear,
"It's me, I haven't left you, I'm well, I'm fine... I'm here..."
I was close to you at breakfast, I watched you pour your tea
You were thinking of the many times, your hand reached down to me...
I was with you at the shops today, your arms where getting sore
I longed to take your parcels, I wish I could do more...
I was with you at my grave today, you tend it with such care...
I want to reassure you, that I'm not lying there...
I walked with you towards the house, as you fumbled for your key
I gently put my paw on you, I smiled and said: "It's me"...
You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair
I tried so hard to let you know, that I was standing there...
It's possible for me, to be near you every day
To say to you with certainty; "I never went away"...
You sat there very quietly... then smiled.. I think you knew,
in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you...
The day is over...
I smile and watch you yawn and say: "Goodnight my love, I'll see you in the morning"
And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
I'll rush across to greet you and we'll stand side by side...
I have so many things to show you, so much for you to see
Be patient, live your journey out... then come home to be with me...
~ Author unknown ~
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Oh Tan, I am so very sorry :hug:
R.I.P. Rio xxx
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Tan I'm so shocked, can't believe it.
It's so unfair, poor little baby :'(
He'll be watching down on his Mummy now though, safe and sound :hug:
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Oh tan, I'm so very sorry for you and your hubby. I just cant believe it with your catproof fencing aswell.
RIP Rio :hug:
Take care of yourself Tan and give Gizzy a big cuddle :(
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Tan so sorry for yours, Chappie and Gizzy's tragic loss
At least you found the boy and he is home forever. Only ever borrowed never owned but always a pawprint in your heart
Deepest symapathies from Liz, Robin and the Clan Cats :'(
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So very sorry Tan, thinking of you and your family. Take care xxx
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Oh no Tan, that's so horrible.
Just know that we're all thinking of you, and if you need anything, we're here for you.
Alex
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:blow kiss: :Sad Bye: ...Rio.
I'm so sorry, Tan. Big hugs for you and yours. It's such a terrible shock.
:care:
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So sorry Tan - So sad for you :hug:
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Oh Tan am so sad for you. What an awful shock. :(
Big hugs to you, hubby and Gizzy :hug:
ems, nina and kiki
xxxxx
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Oh my God I'm so sorry :'( You must be absolutely devastated, please remember that we are all here for you and you and your OH needn't have to go through this alone :hug:
Rio will be safe and sound at the Bridge by now, reunited with his brother and waiting for you until you are ready to collect him :hug:
Remember Our Love
I was chosen today
I'm learning to fly
the world took me away,
but please don't you cry
And I chose you today
to try and be strong
so please don't you cry
and don't say that I'm gone
When you're feeling alone
just remember our love,
I'm up near the stars
looking down from above.
Remember our love
In a moment you'll see
that I'm still here beside you
when you're thinking of me.
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Tan, I'm so sorry. :(
RIP Rio, you were very much loved and will be missed greatly.
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Oh Tanny. Honey I am so so sorry. I can't believe this.
RIP Little Rio, what a wonderful little man you were for your mummy and daddy. We will all miss you darling.
Play very hard at the bridge with Ochi sweet man, til the day mummy and daddy come find you.
Hugs to you and Steve Tanny. xxxx
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I feel totally numb.iive lost him. My baby lad Wizzer Waddle. please come back Rio please. I've done soo wrong, toattly my fault. Everyday i have a battle in me to keep them in and ingnore the crys to go out or let them out for a bit each day. Rio was used to his freedom for a year before Ochi was taken then i tried to keep him in. He was the worse at crying to go out for long periods. I have no excuses for decding to let him out for a bits at a time only his happimess and it has been a compremise between us for me to control his safety as much as i could but letting him have some of the freedom he loved and that made him content and a happy lad.
I have prayed every night that to keep him safe and happy, God listened for almost a year and half now he stopped. Maybe i am looking for someone to blame when i it my fault for letting him carry on going out. Happiness in life or safety, i know now that Gizzy can't have both here.
Oh why does this have to happen tp us.
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Thinking of you at this awful time Tan and family, RIP Rio - I just don't know what else to say :candle:
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Tan please don't blame yourself, what happened was an accident and in no way your fault. :hug: I can only imagine the pain that you must be going through, losing a loved one in any circumstances is devastating but it can only be worse when it comes as such a shock :hug:
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Tan hun i feel so upset for you but nothing compared to what you feel yourself.
Please please dont blame youself at all. Some cats dont care to be kept indoors and will drive you mad trying to get out at every given opportunity, You have done everything possible to try and find a happy balance between safety and happiness but the two are often at war with one another.
For the amount of times my Seb has escaped its only by pure luck we still have him, He is happier when he has 24/7 access to his run but he'd still try and escape into the unrestricted outdoors given the chance, I choose to keep him less than 100% happy by confining him and often feel guilt knowing he's not fully as happy as he could be.
For the ones like Rio and Seb we will always walk on a knife edge trying our best to do what we can for their happiness and safety, However what will be will be and somtimes we just cant escape our fate :'(
This was an accident, a cruel horrible one and neither you nor chappie are in anyway to blame :hug:
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Tan, dont blame yourself love, as Helen says it was an accident and really not your fault. Love and hugs to you xxx I cant imagine what you must be going through right now.
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Tan hunny, sometimes things just happen, there's no rhyme or reason for them, they just do. You mustn't feel guilty, you do what you feel is best for your little ones, and you can do no more :hug:
Rio will be safely on the Bridge now, and he will not be blaming you, so please do not blame yourself :hug:
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I’m so sorry Tan.
RIP Rio play hard at the bridge.
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Sweetheart don't blame yourself. I know its easier said than done, but it's not your fault. You can only protect them so much and you gave him what he wanted all the time, even a little time outside because he needed that.
:hug: :hug:
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Oh Tanniiiii, so sorry to hear about Rio... :owwww:
Hugs and purrs to you and yours from everyone at Plum Cottage. :hug:
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I'm sorry Tan.
You did the right thing - there are some cats that just aren't happy without freedom and outdoors - you should console yourself with the fact he had such a happy and fulfilled life.
I'm thinking of yourself and Chappie :hug:
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Tan, i'm so sorry for your loss - Biscuit and I both send you our love and hugs
cathy
x
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Tan hun, I'm so so sorry.....Ruth has just told me and I'm in tears :'( :'( You know we'll all be here for you, any time night or day, you'll get through this :hug: :hug: :hug: Don't blame yourself, it's not going to bring him back and you weren't in the wrong. I've got a couple here and as soon as the back door opens, they are off like rockets........like you, all I can do is pray they will be safe. I'll be thinking of you, :hug: , xxxxxxxx
RIP Rio babe, sweet dreams, xxxxxxxx
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Tan, I am devastated to hear this and so very sorry for your loss.
You did nothing wrong, hun.
xChristine
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So sorry Tan, lots of love and hugs
Emma
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Tan just wanted to add its the hardest thing we do as owners is to open the door and let them have freedom which some crave and others prefer to be inside, I have both and sometimes I want to keep them all safe and in the house but they just can't do it its in their make up and we love them for it.
The pain will lessen with time but its still to raw to deal with and that hurst even more. I've lost to of my boys to RTA's and still we let the others out hence the reason for our move but he is with Ochi and I'm sure they are reunited and causing havoc at the bridge will all our other bridge kids.
The loss seems insurmountable at the moment and the tears will be flowing from all the family and here at Purrs we can only offer our support and hugs during this time
Tan you are a good fur Mummy but sometimes they just have to go on to the other place earlier than we want its all part of loving them and nobody wrote the book and we go day to day loving them even if only for a short time we are blessed with them in our lives and forever missing them when they go :( :hug:
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Tan, I just caught up with this after my first post - I was hoping so much that it wasn't what I suspected - so so so so so sorry, I can't even imagine what you are going through, my eyes are welling up reading all the posts.
Rio is safe now and will never be hurt again, you were a good meowmy, you gave him what he wanted even though it scared you to let him go out every day - hope he sends you a rainbow soon to let you know he got to the bridge safe.
:hug: :hug:
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Tan, the driver that hurt Rio is to blame not you. And even then, it may well have been an accident. Please don't blame yourself - you gave Rio what he wanted and needed in his life which is love and freedom.
It probably doesn't make it any easier right now, I think most of us feel responsible to some degree when we lose one of our lot.
:care: Sending you a huge hug.
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OMG I've only just seen this.
Tan love I don't know what to say except please don't blame yourself.
You know we are all here for you, as you have been here for so many of us over time.
Take care hun and big hugs to you and the family. :hug:
Lots of Love
Sam, Foxy, Zephyr and Rossi.
RIP Rio baby ... much loved and sorely missed. You're mummy's heart is breaking so send her a rainbow to let her know you have arrived at the bridge. :Sad Bye:
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I'm so,so sorry to hear this. Losing a dear puss is always devastating; in this case so sudden it's particularly hard.
Darling Rio is now at the Bridge waiting for you.
RIP darling Rio
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:hug: :hug: :hug: I dont know what to say, I'm so sorry for your loss.
RIP Rio Send mummy and daddy a rainbow so that she knows you are ok now.
[attachment deleted by admin]
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So sorry Tan
I know the pain believe me.
Rest in peace Rio
:RIP: :candle: :RIP:
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:'(
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Tan,
I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss. Please don't blame yourself, it was not your fault. Accidents do unfortunately happen.
I'm convinced that Rio was much happier to be allowed to live his life as he wanted it, rather than being confined.
It's now almost 3 1/2 years since we lost our little ginger Momo and I 'm still sad when I think about him BUT I also know that although his life was short, he was the happiest little guy around.
Grieve for Rio but don't blame yourself. Remember that what makes us love them so much is their unique spirit, their independence and their hunger for freedom.
He is with his brother Ochi now, looking down on you and probably wondering what all that fuss is about.
Lots of love from me, Samson, Buddie and Pepper
To Rio:
run free and be happy big lad!!
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Oh Tan I'm so sorry for you
Don't really know what to say. :(
Don't blame yourself, I knows it going to be hard not to.
Totally devastated for ya hun :'(
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So so sorry Tan,
R I P Rio :Luv:
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Im so sad to read this, huge hugs to you Tan and try not to blame yourself :hug: :hug:
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Oh Tan - I'm so sorry :( :hug:
RIP Rio. Another babe taken too soon :'(
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So very, very sorry to hear your heartbreaking news.
Thinking of you,
Jas
XX
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Im so sorry Tan.
Im crying as i write this.
Play hard with Ochi at the brige baby xx
My heart is with you xx
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Tan, I'm so sorry :hug:
RIP Rio :'(
Play hard and be happy at the bridge xxx
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Tan I am so very sorry to hear about Rio :hug: Don't blame yourself honey you are a wonderful Mummy :hug: :hug:
He has left a special pawprint in all our hearts and our love, thoughts and prayers are with you, Steve and Gizzy xxxxxxxx
RIP Rio play hard on the Bridge wee man xxxxx
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oh Tan I am so sorry love . I dread this happening every day of my life .Wish I could be there to give you a big hug and wipe away your tears as mine roll down my face
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I'm so sorry, Tan. Pretty much any of our worst nightmare really.
Thoughts are with you and Chappie - you know where to find us all as and when. Xxx
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Hugs to you Tan and Chappie, from all of us at Cat Chat Towers,
We're so, so very sorry to hear you lost Rio. We know how hard it is to lose a precious friend so suddenly, it brings back all the memories of when we lost George. There's nothing we can say that will stop the tears - cry them all - it hurts but heals too. You didn't do anything wrong by allowing him the freedoms he craved, don't even think that. Just remember the good times with Rio, he had a great life with you and was loved, and that counts for everything.
Sending you love and hugs from CC towers,
Gemini, Colonel Beau, Pickford and the folks
xxxxxx
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OMG! Just awful news :(
RIP Rio.....play hard at the bridge x
Hugs to you at this difficult time :hug: :hug: :hug:
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Words fail me. I know how upset you must be. It wasn't your fault.
RIP Rio. Go find Ochi and be reunited and wait for your mummy.
Claire xxxx
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RIP Little Rio" Run play on the bridge with all our other little babes you will never get hurt again, Tan i am lost for words, so so sorry Babe, its not your fault so don't blame yourself, we are all thinking of you and know the pain you are getting i lost one of my Babes and i know how you feel but you must think of all the good times you had togeather, and Tan remember Rio will always be by your side and he would want you to be happy for all the good things you have done for him and the hundreds of little fur babes you have helped save. You do a great job Tan Bless you from Ron and all the little cats at lostcatsbrighton and we will all be praying for you.xxx
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Have only just come on Purrs today and thisa is such terrible news.
RIP lovely Rio, now you are with your brother again, play hard on the Bridge little man.
Tan I am so very sorry, this must be so hard for you, Please dont blame yourself, he needed to be free to be happy aand you gave him what he needed to be happy and I am sure he loved you so much for that.
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Tan, I'm so sorry to hear about gorgeous Rio. You gave him the freedom he wanted and loved, don't blame yourself.
Hugs from me and Dinah :hug:
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Brings back such terrible memories from last September when I found out what had happened to Aslan in RTA and can't begin to tell you how much I feel your pain Tan. I don't know what else to say but hope you find comfort somehow.
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Thanks for the wonderful support xxxxxxxxx I really don't know how i'm gonna handle it, i'm not doing to good. All i wanna do is be as close to him as poss and have been watching his videos all day. I have made my 1st tribute to him. Rio wasn't just a loved lad he was much much more. He had Ochi in him so i never really lost his bro,(that was the only thing that kept me going when My Ochi died 18 months ago. He was the closest relationship i havre ever had with any of my loved babes. I can't believe he won't be sleeping with me, snuggling up for a tummy rub, he won't be putting his head to one side in a funny jesture when he gets playfull, he won't be rollong over in a cute way just to get a tummy rub, he won't be my compnay in the day, he won't be here when i need comfort, he won't be here anymore. Oh my boy what am i gonna do without you. He was the same as a child as we can't have kids, he gave everthing to me and i tried to for him.
Gizzy is my lad and has been asleep all day. He knows, he has seen my lad lying in the Bush. I love my Gizyy lad but he hates his tummy rubbed and likes to sleep on his own. I have lost sooooo much.
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=7C90IiyW-ms
The words of the song i would change to:-
Pray God I can cope.
I stand and feel alone in this world,
This cruel world.
Ooh, it's hard on me little man,
Now his part is over.
Now starts his life with the father.
I know you had a lot of life in you yet.
I know you had a lot of strength left.
I know you had a lot of life in you yet.
I know you had a lot of strength left.
I am crying, I find it hard to let you go.
I am praying, but I can't stop thinking
Of all the things I should've said,
That I never said.
All the things we should've done,
Though we never did.
All the things I should've given,
But I didn't.
Oh, darling, make it go,
Make it go away.
Give me these moments back.
Give them back to me.
Give me that little kiss.
Give me your paw.
I know you had a lot of life in you yet.
I know you had a lot of strength left.
I know you had a lot of life in you yet.
I know you had a lot of strength left.
I am crying, I find it hard to let you go.
I am praying, but I can't stop thinking
Of all the things we should've said,
That we never said.
All the things we should've done,
Though we never did.
All the things that you needed from me.
All the things that you wanted for me.
All the things that I should've given,
But I didn't.
Oh, darling, make it go away.
Come back to me now.
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Tan so very sorry to hear the news of poor Rio
What a wonderful tribute video
Hugs to you both
R.I.P. Rio say hi to Smudge for me Play hard at the bridge babes
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Wonderful video but it broke my heart......................thinking of you so much.
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:'( What a beautiful tribute Tan, absolutely heartbreaking though. I can't stop crying for you :'( Rio was such a beautiful, happy boy, you gave him the best life he could have asked for.
:hug:
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Lovely video Tan. Be prepared for Gizzy acting a little less like himself in nextfew days and weeks. Believe me, tummy rubs and sleeping pals could easily be on the cards. I feel so bad for you, your OH and Gizzy of course. Hugs to you all.
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What a wonderful tribute to a beautiful wee lad :hug:
I am in tears as I type this Tan I wish I could ease your pain :hug: :hug:
E xxxxxxxxxxx
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That's a beautiful video Tanny. Heartbreaking.
xx
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Oh Tan, i'm so sorry. In floods watching the video.
Dx
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So sorry Tan - haven't been on for a while.
I'm sure Rio will get on famously with Binky.
Please don'r beat yourself up - some cats need to be out.
Take care, Angie
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Tan, I am so so sorry to hear this, I Can't imagine how hard it is for you at the moment. We are all here for you, and please dont blame yourself, you gave him what he needed, and he was just too special and God wanted him back. RIP little one, and big hugs to you xx
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Such a beautiful tribute to your little boy Tan :hug:
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Oh Tan, that is such a beautiful video. Heartbreaking, but beautiful. Thank you for sharing it with us.
I wish there was something I could do to help ease the pain, but of course I can't. But remember that you really cannot blame yourself! You were the best Mummy to Rio, and that includes listening to their needs. And Rio needed that extra bit of freedom.
My thoughts are with you all.
:hug:
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tan im so sorry for your loss :hug:
god only takes the best
the video is beautiful
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OMG Tan - I am so so sorry xxxxxxxxx
Cant say much more - things are raw for me at the mo and this has just poured vinegar into my open wound.
The biggest of hugs to you.xxxx
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I'm in tears now but the video is a wonderful tribute to a very beautiful and loving boy. I think that in time all the videos you have of Rio will bring you a lot of comfort <huge hugs>
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Tan, i am so very sorry for your loss. The video was a lovely tribute. I dont think there is anything in this world that would take away the pain you feel, just time seems to ease it. I lost my Harry 6 months ago, and i was in bits. Things are easier for me now, and they will in time for you. :hug:
Take care xx
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I have no excuses for decding to let him out for a bits at a time only his happimess and it has been a compremise between us for me to control his safety as much as i could but letting him have some of the freedom he loved and that made him content and a happy lad.
Oh Tan, I'm so sorry. As others have said you musnt blame yourself. See what you said 'that made him content and a happy lad' - so you see Rio wouldnt have been the cat he was if you'd denied him his freedom. Not much comfort at the moment I know, but I hope in time it will be.
Tan, I know the shock and despair your'e feeling, I've been there, lost several cats on the road years ago, and I know the sadness your'e feeling too, at the moment especially. I'm sure that my darling Suzie and your beloved Rio, joined paws as they crossed Rainbow Bridge. :hug:
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Just wanted to say thank you sooo much for all your support and the wonderful surprize just delivered. It brought a smile to my face which have been nonexsistant last couple of days. It really means so much and all your messages helps sooo much . You lot are soo wonderful and i thank you from the bottom of my heart. :Luv: I have never cried so much in my life and not sleeping well as keep thinking Rio who be doing this and that and will any minute jump on the bed with his usual brrrrp and snuggle in. i have been trying to block it out today but not too well. :'(
I am also very scared for Gizzy who has been going outside the front same restricted out time as Rio for just over a year so he is also used to his freedom in the day but i now know Ochi wasn't a one off 18 months ago and the road is just to dangerous to have any cats here that are outside ones. it is quieter but the danger is a field accross the road and spirodic traffic so the cats see no cars then cars do speed down. I can't put Gizzy at risk so think have no chioce but to make him indoor only . I still can't let it sink in. I used to live in bournemouth in a busy town and all my cats never got run over but here in a country, quieter location i have lost two adorable lads which i will never get over loosing. The other choice is the same i took 18 mths ago and will lead at some point to his death or injury from the road. The same battle i have had for 18 months to still here............ to let him have a short but fullfilled life or a long not so forfilled life. I think now i have no choice but to keep him in.
I think you would all agree Gizzy has to be indoor only now??? but as he has been going out for a year, i am worried he will not be happy esp being on his own now from used to being with another cat all his life so far. He is 2 on Friday. How is it best to retarin him to be indoor only? Do you think he could be happy? He not too good with toys and gets bored easily. :(
Thanks to you all sooo much, you have given me wonderful support and i know only you can understand how devistated i am.
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Well i'd say regardless on the choice for the cats Tanni you just cant take the risk of putting yourself through this again.
What about your garden ? wasnt it cat proofed or have they managed to find ways to escape it. Thinking about my own circumstance esp where seb is concerned (he lived outdoors the first 18 months of his life !) he definately likes his run and after being shut in the house for those months when the other one was dismantled i do believe he appreciates his run more now. He's kinda unbearable when he's indoor only but much much happier when he's allowed to come and go to his run when he pleases, He also really likes his playstation and lies on top of it :Luv:
I think there may be ways you and gizzy can strike a comprimise but you need peace of mind now, you cant let yourself worry all the time, and however much you've worried since ochi you are going to be 100 x worse now and making yourself ill just isnt going to make gizzy happy either.
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Keep him in Tan - Back catproofed garden only.
Zubin goes mad and headbutts the netting and I have thought about it but NO. We live in a quiet cul-de sac and you know what happened to Zakie Pooh. There is an idiot in a metro that speeds past and a knob on a motorbike (no helmet - says it all). Don't care Zu you are staying in the garden only. Zeb has never been out. Thai sepnds most of her time indoors as the boys are out and they chase her, but they know I love them and I cannot go through it again.
Gizz will be fine - just re-train him - get him a kitten to beat up. He has plenty of toys, just do your mad thing again and go and play with him in the sun,rain and snow. Zubin is ok but he has his moments hanging on the netting, Gizzy Goo will learn.
Rio was such a lovely lad and your tribute to him was just wonderful, very moving and straight from the heart. When will the pain stop??? why does it keep happening to us decent kind people?. Is he trying to turn us bad?
Shifty nextdoor was sat in the middle of the road and the knob on the motorbike had just been past so I went out with the biscuits and got him on the drive. (Shifty, not the knob on the bike)
Hugs xxxx
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I agree with Lynn and Gail :hug: :hug:
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Hi Tan. Hugs to you.
My 3 all have outdoor access 24/7 so you can see what my natural inclination is to allow them free access to outdoors. I live on a very quiet narrow Avenue set back about 20 yards from the road. We bought this house with cats in mind. All the same, after living here for almost 17 years, we lost Aslan my darling boy to an rta last year. Since then, I strongly discourage, altho do not completely prevent, the boys from getting out the front and so far they pretty well always stay around the back (at least whilst I'm looking). If I thought Aslan's rta was not a one off (which of course I hope and pray it was) the boys would just have to get used to indoor only or I'd look into cat runs. At the moment, on balance, I'm inclined to continue to allow 24/7 access to outdoors but I don't have the same problems with speeding traffic as you appear to have.
I suggest you take it slowly at the moment and keep Gizzy in and see how he reacts. Please try not to overeact if he howls at the door initially. You are feeling very raw at the moment and, if it were me, I would "feel gizzy's pain" even if he was just pissed off at staying in for a bit. Why not give it a few days and see how he goes. He is soo beautiful by the way. Really beautiful :Luv:
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Tanni don't make a decision too soon. For now, I agree keep him in and watch how he manages it. If you have the back cat proofed and he can't get out then you can still let him out there once you feel comfy enough with that. Maybe giving him extra activities inside (not toys) but climbing opportunities, hunting etc (read up on the very great stuff you posted for us on the Health and Behaviour) on how to stimulate an indoor cat. Just take it a day at a time honey. I can only offer that advice (probably very lame). :hug: :hug:
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have you got feliway diffusers tanni ? might be worth getting a couple of em going just incase gizzy does find it a wee bit stressful over next couple of weeks. (remember to take yer perfume ones out)
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Tan only just seen this thread although i had read your one on Rainbow Bridge but wasnt sure how ^Rio^ had passed.
I am so sorry that you have lost ^Rio^ in this way, i know only too well the guilt and heartache of loosing a furbaby to an RTA - infact i have lost 3.
You CANT blame yourself hun, Cats have to be cats.
After each RTA i kept my remaining cats indoors but they were so miserable, i had to allow them to go out.
Now they go out daytime only and i worry all the time they are out.
I wish i could take away the pain you are feeling right now - please know that we are all here for you and share your heartache
Much love and gentle healing hugs
Michelle xxxxxx
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So sorry Tan, its hard to find the words to comfort at a time like this. Like many others on here I too know the pain and shock of losing a beloved baby to an RTA, thats how my beautiful Ellie passed away. Its taken me a long time to accept it, but I have and time is the only healer.
I am thinking of you and your family Tan, look after one another xxxxxxxx
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Tan I think you will do whats right for both of you can can and do adapt we have our real nasty feral Ace who is 4 he spent 2 years outside as an un-neutered tom and has now spent 10 months inside nearly 2 years but he was part of our great escape and he allowed himself to be trapped, he has adapted and now doesn't look to go out and plays with thelaser pen like a kitten and has company in the other 14 grounded ones and the company of the indoor/outdoor mob in the evening.
Its the hardest choice we make and only you will know what is best loosing them is devastating and I'm sure Gizzy is confused as to where his brother is but I know when we lost Toerag I had to give Tiger his freedom the next day as being feral he went mad whereas Sweetie Toerags sister stayed in at her choice.
Whatever you decide you have the Clans full support from all their paws and ours to as we have both sides to your dliemma.
Liz :hug:
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Tan, I'm so very sorry. I'm gutted for you. Don't know what else to say. :hug:
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Hope you're doing ok, Tan :hug: I don't know what to suggest about Gizzy, tbh. I guess I wouldn't make a decision too quickly and as a knee jerk reaction. It's natural that you want to prevent the same from happening to him, but if he's used to going outside he might not be happy indoors. If you can cat proof your back garden that would be great.
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Dear Tan, I've only just seen this now and want to say just how very sorry I am and I'm thinking of you.
I nearly lost Swampy when he was an outdoor cat, to cars and also getting himself shut in cellars. My late Mum told me I was taking years off my own life and to keep him in and get him a companion. About the only advice of her's I ever followed, but it was good advice. Swampy was unhappy for 6 months, but then became a relaxed, loving and actually happier cat. They do need more attention though and if you can bear to get Gizzy a 4 legged friend when you feel up to it, as long as they get on well, that may be the answer.
We had a terraced house and built a small cat run attached to the window and screened the other windows. Looked not so lovely, but b*gger the neighbours if the little loved ones are safe. x
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:hug: Tan.....
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Thanks soooooooooo much for all your messages. I have been reading them via email each and every one and it really really means alot having your wonderful support. thank you soooo much. :hug:
Still can't take it in he's not coming home and i can't watch or think anything about him at the mo. I am trying to concentrate on Gizzy lad and have been gradually trying to change his habbit of going out the front which reading on the net you have to do gradually. Last few days have been shutting the wooden door of the front cat flap (they both knew that when the wooden door was down it was in time) and only let him out twice in a day and he has come back within about 15mins thank god. I have been ignoring his crys to go out the front which actually he isn't crying too much and i have distracted him by playing in the garden. Today i have litterally been a garden knome and he hasn't been out or asked to go out at all so far. I have decided it is the only way to go to retrain Giz to be indoor / cat proofed garden only and the biggest reason is it's not if it's when he would be seriously hurt or killed on that road.
Gizzy and I have been catching bugs and he found a frog which he chased all round the garden till it plopped into the pond this am so he is now knackered and slepping it off.
It was his birthday on Friday just gone, and was 2 years old. It helps to think he will be with me alot longer than my Ochi (year and half yrs old) and My Wizzer (just over 3 yrs ) if he is not allowed out the front but i just hope he is a happy lad too.
Sorry i haven't been on alot lately, i hope to be on very soon and get the Purrs shop up and running.
Love to you all
:thanks: :thanks: :thanks: :thanks: :thanks: :thanks: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
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Tan so glad to hear that you're keeping ok :hug:
It's great that your persisting with keeping him in as much as possible too.
Just take care of yourself, hubby and Gizzy and take your time, don't worry about the shop just now, and if you need any help I'd be more than happy to give you a hand :hug:
xxx
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Hi Tan
Good to see you back :hug:
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lovely to hear from you Tan.Big hug from all at the stables. I know what you are going through and sometimes it feels like your heart will burst with the pain but eventually it gets a little easier. I couldn't cope with losing Teddy so blocked it out and I still cannot think about it now two years on.
I have been thinking of restricting my two because of losing Teddy but even if they go out the back they can work their way round to the front. I'm afraid to shut the front cat flap because they could get trapped theire by the Ginger Tom with no refuge. I can't enclose my garden because it has a right of way for my neighbour. So I have to go thorough the daily dread of worrying how they are when I'm at work .
I don't know what to do for the best either. I am trying to encourage mine to play in the back garden rather than the front lane. I know they both like hunting so I have put some sheets of wood and slates and roof tiles down and other things that mice like to nest under and left several areas of my garden really wild. I have created a wildlife garden at the bottom and hope to put a pond in for all the frogs. I try to keep the grass cut short regularly for the rest of the garden so they don't have to fight their way through wet grass (which they both hate). They still play out the front lane on the tarmac !?????
Ever time I see them out the front lane I toot my horn loud and long which is teaching them to be scared of cars and I have used handclaps and sharp noises to scare them into the bushes when cars come down the drive. I don't want to move home so I have to try and improve the odds for them. It would break my heart to keep Peanut indoors now because he is a confirmed hunter and outdoor cat. I moved to this house in a private no through lane so that he could go outdoors. Its not safe anywhere.
I am not going to l;et the cars beat me I go out and remonstrate with anyone speeding and try to make everyone aware of the animals down the lane. I have set up a PIR light and CCTV to encourage drivers to slow down I hope you can find a way to keep Gizzy safe . Maybe we should all start a `pet safety cut your speed' campaigne in our areas.
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Good to hear from you, Tan :hug: I wish I had some words of wisdom for you but I don't. It hurts like hell when you lose a furbabe and nothing can take that away. The saying that time heals is partly true - in time you do get to the point where you smile when you think of them instead of crying, but you'll never stop missing him. Guess that's the price we pay for loving them. I'm glad Gizzy seems to be ok about not going out the front. he'll get used to it.
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Can I also add that my Gizzy (who i catnapped from my sis) was used to going out for a year before he came to me....mine are indoor only....must admit bit of a battle at first, but now just accepts this as the norm :)
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It's true, Tan, my mum's cats were outdoor country cats until she moved into an apartment after Dad died. She had a really small pen built onto the balcony and that (on a concrete base) was all the outside they got from there on in. They settled in just fine. One was a siamese and the other burmese - both cats of strong character, so if anyone was going to be a problem they would have been. Losing a pet is like losing a child. You never get over it, particularly in such horrible circumstances. But it does get to the stage where you can laugh again. Focus on all the good things you did together and it will help Rio reach down from the bridge and give you a kitty-hug. Do take care and look after yourself. Your other furbabes need you too.
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Great to hear from you Tanni.
:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: from the Lex monster xx
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You take care of yourself too, hun
:hug: :hug:
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Nice to see you back. I'm sure Gizzy will keep you occupied and will keep up all the good training Rio and Ochi started in to getting his human sorted.
Our thoughts are with you and yours
Liz, Robin and the Clan Cats and Jazz the dog and as yet 2 un-named goldfish ;)
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Nice to see you on Purrs Tanniiiiiii ;D
It sounds like Gizzy is learning akready, cats are so clever. Look after yourself ;D
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Sounds like Gizzy will come round to the idea of being an indoor/garden cat, bless him. Look after yourself Tan. :hug: and Chaptan too :hug:
And Gizzy :hug:
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Have kept Gizzy in now since Sunday and he has been soooo good and only cryed twice by the door a little. I have been playing with him a lot in the garden with fishing rod toys and bugs but he starting to get board of them now . I know I have spoilt them with the toys so balls and little furry mice don’t work with Gizzy and he doesn’t play on his own very well. He mainly played with Rio more than toys. The garden is only small too. I just hope it will be ok.
LOve to you all
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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glad to hear gizzy has been making it not too hard on you :hug:
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glad to hear gizzy has been making it not too hard on you :hug:
Me too :hug:
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Gizzy will be just fine I'm sure :hug:
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With love and care (and Gizzy gets lots of that, it's clear) cats can be remarkably resiliant. He'll miss Rio, but he'll learn to adapt.
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Good little Gizzy.
:hug: to you
xC
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I am glad that Gizzy is doing ok indoors
But -
How are you doing Tan ? :hug:
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Tan,
It's good to see you've posted. :) Hope you're all doing OK.
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I am sure Gizzy will do fine ;D
We look forward to seeing you back, how are you doing? :hug: :hug:
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Good for Gizzy, who will be just fine indoors with all that love and play. Hope you are ok Tan?
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:thanks: hinnies so much for your posts and support. :Luv: :Luv: :Luv: :Luv: :Luv:
I am ok when i don't think about my lad and sooooo much about him i will never have again. :'( Think my brain has had enough of crying and is protectively trying to avoid thinking of him.
Still have a shaking inside and seem to be in panic mode all the time, finding it hard to relax esp as i still worry all the time about Gizzy.
Gizzy is starting to get pretty frustrated now esp in early eve. I have been playing with him every time he wakes to try and break his habbit of going out the front but he is getting bored very easily even with diff new toys and diff games. It was sooo upsetting to see him looking so fed up last night and anything i tried to entertain him wasn't working. I have all the differnet toys and even been out hunting real feathers to use with them but I can see in his face he is sad and fed up after the initial play with a new toy. Have been rotating them too :( Realized I'm not enough for him - ie to replace playing with Rio which he did alot and the hunt and diff things happening outside.
When Ochi died, i did the same with Rio ie played and gave him lots of attention and we had the closest relationship i have ever had with one of my babes but i made him very dependant on me. (Rio was never a big sleeper in the day at all and always active and loved going out the front) If i had to work most of the day (work from home so always here for him when he wanted me) i would play with him thoughout the day in shorter bursts but had to get work done so had to, at times ingnore his attention seeking, he would then go out instead. We got into a good routine so i could have a good working day and Rio was happy with me, the outside and playing with Gizzy. We all got into this routine with Gizzy mainly sleeping more than Rio in the day and in between sleeping and our games would also go out. Everyone was relaxed, content active and happy but not safe!
Trying so hard to find a happy solution and really need to to stop this panic feeling. Last night seeing him upset and bored, one thing kept coming in my head "It's not right" "it's not right" .....to stop him going out which he loves. He is only 2 years old and active. But it's also not right for being loving responsible mum of me to let him out to be killed or hurt . I would always put his happyness before mine as to have him live unhappily would me my doing as it was my choice to adopt him in the 1st place. It's a no win situation and soo hard.
It's like i can't rest or be calm inside till i find a solution, So i really need your thoughts, This is where i am at:-
-He is getting bored with what he has. I know now i am not enough for him, for the rest of his life to entertain him all the time kept inside / garden only to have a happy content life for many years.
-The garden is not big enough to entertain himself on his own even though it has lots of tunnels,pond, posts etc for him.
-If i let him out as he is used to for over a year (even if i restrict his out times), he is in danger of the road.
- Gizzy hates anything touching his back and gives you a slap if you do, so cant use a harness to take him out.
-He has always had the company of another cat to play with and now he is on his own.
Poss solutions?
- Still keep Gizzy indoor / garden only and see if he will except a playmate who would also be indoor / garden only to help entertain him. This does scare me cause it took Rio a long while to introduce Gizzy and Rio used to go out alot to escape the intruder in his home. If Gizzy feels the same, he his now not allowed out so would be trapped with no outlet (like Rio had) from the intruder in his core territory. This could cause him more unhappyness and may not solve is love of the outside anyway. (to bring another babe in to this area and to let them have freedom would mean a short life so would only have another babe if indoor only)
- Let Gizzy go out at very restricted times once or twice and be an only cat.
Whatcha think or any other thoughts?
:Luv: :Luv: :Luv: :Luv: :Luv:
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tan this is a question only you can answer. Personally, whenever I lose an animal I go right out and obtain a replacement (if one is to be had). The energy I use in introducing it into the household and making sure no-one's noses are out of joint and that the new animal is comfortable safe and secure is positive energy and so can help keep the stress symptoms you are describing. It would also give Gizzy something to occupy his mind, particularly if you keep the new kitty in a different room so they can get used to each others' smells before meeting nose to nose.
On the other hand, only you know how Gizzy might react to an intruder. It is important to remember that a lot of our emotions are transferred to the cat, so you may be assuming he would not take kindly to a newcomer because that is how you feel you might react.
Getting an outdoor cat accustomed to being an indoor cat is hard, but if he has a safe garden he can go to that ensures he is off the street then as a responsible cat owner you maybe have to ensure that this is where he is restricted to. Even if it means being a bit mean in the interim.
Big hugs and make sure you are looking after yourself.
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Tan, petal - you're being way too hard on yourself, and not giving you or Gizzy time to grow accustomed to the loss of Rio.
Cats really are very adaptable, but like us, they need time.
I think what Blackcat says is good advice. The beauty of having a new face around is that it helps to concentrate your mind and energy, but you have to be prepared for the risk that you or Gizzy would be uncomfortable with the new arrangement so soon. Then again, some cats - when they get used to being only cats - would be horrified at the thought of another cat in their home so advancing the argument introductions are best done sooner rather than later.
Paddy was like that when we got Flynn. He never really took to Flynn - he tolerated him, and sometimes he'd let Flynn close, but on the whole he viewed Flynn as a damned nuisance. When Flynn went missing Paddy wasn't fussed, and started to spend more time in the house than he had before. He was more upset when our old dog had to be PTS - he adored her, and used to act as her eyes and ears when she lost her sight and went deaf. He missed her loads.
I think it's so hard for you to make a decision at the moment when everything's so raw. You're full of guilt over Rio's death and for Gizzy being alone, but you're hurting too.
I hope that if you're meant to have another companion for Gizzy you'll get a sign very soon. The great celestial cat agency will let you know. Til then, take care of yourself, and :hug: from me and Paddy
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Tan, petal - you're being way too hard on yourself, and not giving you or Gizzy time to grow accustomed to the loss of Rio.
Couldn't agree more...
Also agree with BC, of course Gizzy will miss going out the front but is it really him that is sad or do you feel sad for him because you know he used to enjoy it? I've seen pics of your garden and it's fab, a real kitty paradise. If Gizzy was the type that was out roaming 24/7 then it might be more difficult but it sounds like he is the type that can get used to having a smaller territory, that's all it is - you're not depriving him of outdoor pleasures as he has a fab garden to play in and feel the wind in his fur, chase butterflies etc
If you feel able and you think Gizzy would accept it then a playmate might be a good idea, when I look at the boys playing and chasing each other I'm so grateful that I have two as I don't think I couldn't be playing with them for the amount of time that they play with each other.
:hug: to you, and a head kiss for Gizzy
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I'd second all that, Tan. From my own experience, my Swampy was unsettled and cried sometimes for nearly 6 months when I kept him indoors after just one near drama too many and I felt like an axe murderer, but after that he's never looked back. He adapted just fine as I'm around a lot, as you are. He became really relaxed and people dependent, very very purry and much less anxious too. I did get him a companion, which stressed him out at first (normal!) but he's a very sociable cat so he accepted the kitten (bat eared Max) after a few days. They are still fiercely jealous but are always curled up together and love each other and there are mad kitty games they can play that we just can't! I don't know Gizzy's character - does he generally get on with other cats quite well? He's probably picking up on your distress as well, but in my personal opinion, you're doing the best to protect him and he will almost definitely get used to being an indoor cat, especially as you are around.
I'm a bit confused - you have a safe bit of garden that he can be unsupervised in and can't get out? Otherwise, any chance of a cat run situation so he can get some safe outdoor space? I found that a harness, although hugely enjoyed by Swamp, distressed him a bit - outside but no freedom to move around where he wanted, whereas a cat run he just loved.
Please think of yourself too and look after yourself. It's your decision obviously but in my umble, you're doing the right thing for both of you. :hug:
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I wrote a post earlier and then lost it all cos comp locked up :censored:
I agree with the others and yes you are being too hard on yourself :hug: I went through all this when I lost Dyl, Nobby and Oscar and I didn't know what to do for the best apart from the fact, they would now be living indoors. Mine all loved going out and used to spend hours in the woods but for their sake and mine, things had to change. Giz will find it hard, he's not only lost his buddy but his freedom as well :'( In some ways it was easier for mine to accept, as they always have plenty of other mates they can hang around with but Sooty got hit the hardest.........Dylan was his best mate, they were always together and were always snuggled up, it broke my heart watching him as he seemed like a lost soul. In time they do get over their loss but if I'm honest, I don't think Sooty will fully get over losing him, he's never been the same since Dyl went :'( In your situation, I would get him a playmate, he's still young and needs another outlet as you've already said yourself, sometimes us slaves are not enough for our furbabes no matter how hard we try. Playmate wise, I would either go for one of similar age to Giz and similar temperament, or go for a couple of kittens.......this will also help fill the gap for you that darling Rio has left behind and may make it easier for Giz to cope with his loss. We all know you will do what is best for Giz, you know him better than anyone and will know whether he will accept a new buddy or two into his life. Thinking of you lots, and you know where I am, :hug: xxxxxxxxxxxx
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hi tan , if it were me id secure /cat proof your garden for giz and try and get him use to just making do with staying in his own garden at least you wont have to worry every time you let him out ,
can i just say that id think long and hard before getting another play mate for giz
i got another cat 7 months after losing my precious cat and although i hate myself for saying this i could never love her as much as i loved my other cat and i wish i allowed myself a little longer before getting another one
my thoughts are with you tan take care :hug:
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i got another cat 7 months after losing my precious cat and although i hate myself for saying this i could never love her as much as i loved my other cat and i wish i allowed myself a little longer before getting another one
When we take on another cat, we have to remember, they will never take the others place. When I lost Dylan, he was my baby and yes he was my favourite which I hate admitting, and I never thought I could love another cat like I did him but I was wrong. I will always miss and love Dyl but I've had so many needy furbabes in and I've had a few that have melted my heart like Dyl did but none will ever take his place, they are all unique in their own way and I think if you get another one thinking they will in some way replace the one you've lost, a lot of people will be sadly disappointed as this doesn't happen.......no two cats are the same but it shouldn't stop you loving the new one for who they are :Luv:
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How big is your back garden, Tan? If you don't want to say, that's fine - Blip's territory is probably about the size of an average garden outside London. So if yours is that sort of size, I am sure Gizzy will soon adjust to back garden life.
I am really sorry to hear you are having panicky feelings, hun. Breathe deeply from the diaphragm for a minute or so when you feel that happening.
:hug:
xC
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Thanks for your posts :Luv:
Yeap i have all my garden cat proofed and redesigned it for the cats when i lost Rio's bro Ochi 18 mths ago to the road. It was never enough for Rio so took the awful descion to let him out the front still.
Gizzy is 98% always in the garden as he can come and go as he pleases via cat flap in back door. Both Rio (used to) & Gizzy sleep out there at night esp in Summer.
The garden is about 48 foot long (8 x 6ft fences long) and 20ft wide (3 and half 6ft fences wide) It has a roofed summer porch off to the house with soft chair (old arm chair) and other seats al for the cats to sleep on. Also i keep the cat carrier there behind a chair so they have a hidey place in the porch to sleep. Then we have the main garden which has two cat tunnels (one of them has two floors in two sections) running along on each side, lawned area in middle with pond to one side with fish, have a double cat cabin one one side with a cat playstaion and high walkways all round the garden on the fences. Then at the back we have a big shed with a enclosure on the top for them and at the back of the shed another cat cabin high up and another cat tunnel. We still need to put more plants in and at the mo i have left everthing grow wild even the grass in last two weeks.
All this and they love it but doesn't seem enough think cause it's only small area.
The pics below and above are at time either when building the garden or as it is now except now it it more over grown!
Gizzy has always been more of a cat's cat and used to follow Rio around alot and entice him to play. This was great for Rio when enventually excepted him after about 4 weeks. It brought Rio a new liease of life and they played alot in the garden. Gizzy is more "playful agressive" than Rio was and used to play roughly with Rio which Rio sometimes hated as he was more gentle nature. Gizzy has never learnt not to use his claws in a play fight and that usually meant Rio backed off quicker when Gizzy got too rough. Gizzy is definately a strong personality and doesn;t like to be pettied to much but loved Rio licking him. :innocent: He def would need to be top cat if i introdued another babe for him for company.
I totaaly agree that each and every one of my babes can never ever be replaced by anything. Each one has had a special wonderful way and personality and all will always be in my heart.
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sound like he needs a new kittie - around 6 months old so it can stand the heat ;D What lucky kitties you have to have all that available for them........ Am intrigued by the idea of a cat-proof garden - not a concept that has been developed in the antipodes where we go in for runs but the garden is much better as they can run in any direction and have a thoroughly good romp!!
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Thanks :Luv:
It has alot of stuff for them but only small so now new bits to discover. i thought when designing it, it would be great for them and they do love it but it can't beat the wide outdoors and with Rio he cryed all the time to go out the front even with the garden as it is. :tired: He did like the pond though as you can see form one of his fishing pics.
We will be putting in some more plants to make the back of the pond totally wild but i am rubbish at gardening so tend to chuck in what i think and hope the plants survive. Found some crickets today in the feild and brought them in for him to hop and catch. He's not a very good hunter as they all got away and now it sounds like we are abroad!!!
Helen hun you hit one nail on it's head with Also agree with BC, of course Gizzy will miss going out the front but is it really him that is sad or do you feel sad for him because you know he used to enjoy it?
yes i feel very guilty and sad and seeing him looking around or wandering around the garden as if he is bored i tend to belive it more. :'(
If Gizzy could get on with another babe i think it would help him as i know that no human can play like two cats can and the company then maybe enough for them to stay indoor and happy. Oh that would be so great and a big weight of worry lifted. Only if i can get the right newbie. I know from Rio and Gizzy that any newbie has to be smaller and with Gizzy mustn't be a timid nature or Gizzy will scare the life out of him but also not too strong personality to want to take over top cat position (this is what happened to Rio with Gizzy) . I have always had boys as i have read that girls can get bosy and want to be top cat when they get older which wouldn't be good for Gizzy.
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Tan, you have a wonderful garden and it's obvious how much consideration you've put into whether your cats will get enough enjoyment out of it.
I kind of have the same dilemma as you with regards to feline companionship, as although we currently have four cats Parsley was the only one that enjoyed actually playing with the youngest. Little Cat mopes around the house quite a lot and it's awful to see her looking lost. She has tried unsuccessfully to initiate play with the others, but they've never really been interactive with their mad half hours.
Unfortunately, I'm well aware that practically speaking my lot are getting older which means heftier vets bills - which in turn means it would be harder to support five cats. Gah!
Sending you a huge hug. :)
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I think that you have a wonderful garden and there is plenty of room for Gizzy to enjoy. And plenty of things to see and do.
It is difficult to know, of course, but at the moment Gizzy is grieving, so it is probably not that he is bored, just very sad.
My guess is that he will adapt happily to life in your back garden. As I mentioned, Blip has a territory not dissimilar in size.
:hug:
xC
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Did he actually see Rio once he was gone? If not, he is possibly looking for him, which would be why he wants out. Grisley as it sounds, I find it far easier for the animals if they can see their lost companion on last time so they know what has happened. Ever since i started doing this, the remaining ones have adapted much faster.
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Tan I think you have a very big heart. You love your boy so much and want what's best for him. The fact that you are already thinking about giving Gizzy a playmate means you are open to the idea, no one needed to suggest it. If its right for you, you will know when to make that call.
Gizzy is young and I am sure a playmate will keep him happy if they get to play together.
Sometimes blessings come when you least expect them... x
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Tan, how about contacting one of the local rescues and seeing if they will let you foster a cat you think might be suitable? Good luck, and i do hope you can find a good solution.
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I agree with what everyone else has said and your garden size should be fine for Gizzy and a friend , if you decide to go that way.
Just one thing worries me a bit about the garden and its rienforced by the pictures, Others may have different views on this and mine is, I wonder whether the walk ways round the top of the garden make Gizzy more inclined to want to be on the otherside cos he can see whats there and is very close but cant get there?
I was thinking about Misa and Sasa and how Misa is now copying Sasa and climbing up on the big wall, which is really scaring me cos they can climb over at the end into the front and the road. I keep catching Misa up there and he is using it as a look out across the gardens up the road and possible a good perch to watch for mice and birds next door. He gets down reluctantly when I go out and have also caught Sasa up there too but she is harder to get down cos she is scared of me and I am worried she may panic and rush the wrong way.
I was thinking how they would be if they could not get out of the garden, which is twice as long as yours, and it makes me feel guilty trying to stop them cos they go into the field behind in the summer so I understand your dilema 100%. The heart says I couldnt keep them in the garden all the time but I am getting so scared of what they are doing now although have no way of stopping them at present.
Soooooooooo this makes me wonder about the walkways and the temptation, cos I thought they were so good when I first saw them. Cats love to climb, well Misa does, so wondering whether a big climbing thingy in the middle of the garden maybe a good idea.
As I say just thoughts and others may have comments on this too.
Please keep Mr Gizmo in, I know its hard but agrre with others that he will adjust, cos he was OK with it at one time, wasnt he?
I think that to get another kitty you have to be ready as well as Gizzy and its a big decision when you already have a cat. Like blackcat, as you know, I needed to get another cat as soon as Kocka had gone to the Bridge but I didnt have another cat. I found just the act of going to see cats and touching them to be wonderful but getting the right cat is very hard I think. Certainly introductions for you maybe hard and you have to be ready to be able to go through what could be a stressful time, are you ready and/or could it be helpful to you?
Sorrry not being much help but I think you in your heart know what you want to do :hug: :hug:
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Ditto>Gill re: the walkways ;)
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Thanks for ya replies hunnies
The eve my lad was killed and i kept going out calling and looking for him, i got Gizzy in and unbeknown to me Guzzy was on a fence just above where Rio was lying in the bushes. He def must of seen him and when i eventually found Rio, Steve brought him in for me in a blanket and layed him down so Gizzy couls sniff him. I just couldn't face seeing Rio so i was out of the room. The last picture in my head i have of Wasser is of his back curled up in the bush and i couldn't look at him after that cause the pictures always stay in my mind.
So yes Gizzy has seen Rio before we took him to be cremated. He should be coming home from the cremitorium soon. I still can't think of him and his wonderful ways and try and ignore any thoughts of him at the mo.
Not sure about the garden walkways hun but it's a very good point. I will keep an eye if he is looking over alot and it is making it harder for him to adjust. From reading advice and speaking to our wonderful Wizz's and reading Vicky Hall's advice on indoor cats, you can double their territory by increasing the verital space in ya home. So want to keep the walkways at the mo and he does have three diff heights in the garden to already. He has a ceiling cat tree in the bedroom where he can sleep on top of our wall to wall wadroboes and has a half way scratching activity in the lounge in the corner. Will also be putting up shelves for walkways and sleeping places on the hall walls and also some in the lounge to add to his hight in the house. Steve doesn't know yet though :shify:
Gizzy has been excellent today doing alot of sleeping now after a big play with a long bamboo stork, he caught long leaves on the end and killed them at least 15 times. Steve says he was ok yest eve and cried a few times but otherwise contantly in the garden. I had to go off to the hospital to see my sis and didn;t get back till past 11. I was worried he would be ok, maybe i worry too much about him and he is picking it up lol!
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Awww.........Gizzy is prob just as bad worrying bout his meowmy :Luv: :hug: :hug:
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Your garden looks great, Tan. I think Gizzy will adapt if you give him time. Looks like he has plenty of outdoor space.
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So want to keep the walkways at the mo and he does have three diff heights in the garden to already.
I'd keep the walkways Tan, but maybe get some more plants, climbers (or more bamboos and tall grasses which are pretty indestructible! etc to grow up and around them, so its a bit more interesting, gotta step over twiggy bits and through undergrowth etc to get where he wants to go you know? What about a couple of posts like I've got in the garden, with platforms round? Again, maybe in amongst the plants, such as that nice bamboo you've got. I just used ordinary fence post banged in with metpost, and to add a bit of 'finesse' (LOL!) an acorn finial on the top!
I've heard behaviourists say its a good idea to bring new stuff into the garden every now and then, you know - something new to investigate, like new plants, maybe a big ole log etc.
Heres a pic of my post
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Your garden is wonderful, Tan. (Ooooh I wish. Bloody London flats!) What they do like, if you can find it, is a pipe wide enough to run through but not get stuck. If it were me, I'd get a kitten as a companion as I think from experience that it's easier for them to make friends if one of them is a wee one.
How are you doing today?
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Tan your garden looks like a cat paradise! I like the run ways, aslong as Gizzy isnt sat there the whole time peering over i dont think its teasing him.
I also think the plans for the house sound great, im sure Gizzy will love that :hug:
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Tan what ever is right for you and yours will become clearer with time, on the fun issue I took an outside bird table and put it in the family room with some scratching posts for the inside only Clan cats and they use it as a scratching post and take turns to sleep in the table part, Boston and Dallas also like to play on the roof area - Robin thought I was mad but they love it and now we have one outside in the middle of the garden for the others with no ground cover they haven't caught anything on it so its a game of king of the table!
The garden looks wonderful and now has me wondering how Robin is going to put a pond in the outside run I am designing in my head!!!
They do adapt Miss Gracie was 15 when trapped and is now a gummy 17.yo. inside Lady! ;)
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How are you Tan? And how's Gizzy doing? hope you are both ok?
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Hi Hun
:thanks: :hug:
It helps to have Gizzy and Garf but i am still not thinking about my lad cause it hurts to much when an image of his wonderful ways come into my head. The only way i am coping is not to think of him. I would give anything to have my lad back. :Luv: :Luv: :Luv:
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>Swampmaxmum.......and if your wondering about Garf check this out ;)
http://www.chaptanservices.com/purrs/index.php?topic=6164.msg96187#msg96187
Tan :hug:
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:care: :care:
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Blimey, don't know how I missed the Garf thread - well I do actually. Old age and just plain daft. He's so cute. It's wonderful that they are getting on well -you won't have that furniture looking so good for much longer mind you.
:hug: :hug: take care of yourself Tan.
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Tan I really am so sorry i missed this thread ... :(..
I know nothing i can say will make the pain go away at least you now have Garfy warfy and sure Rio would approve ..
All my love and furry headbutts hun xx
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Thanks soo much :Luv: :Luv: All ya posts really helps and means alot :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :thanks: :thanks: :thanks: :thanks: :Luv: :Luv: :Luv: :Luv:
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Tan I have sat hewre & read through each & every post !!! Took ages !
Sorry bout your little chappy.. :'(
Garf is absolutley stunning ! Glad he is settling in well x x