Purrs In Our Hearts - Cat Forum UK

Warm Welcome to Purrs! => Welcome to Newbies :) => Topic started by: madpants on January 12, 2008, 10:47:57 AM

Title: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 12, 2008, 10:47:57 AM
Hello, I'm new to this chat site and have been re-directed here after logging onto catchat, and in particular, the rainbow bridge. I wanted to log on a few days ago, but as the chat always seems so bright and breezy i didn't want to bring everyone down with my sad mood. But today i'm really feeling it, and am hoping that someone is out there knows what i'm going through. My lovely Willow went to heaven last saturday and i have been really struggling all week, but particularly today, as it all happened a week ago today. I have strong moments and then completely crumble, and i just can't seem to find peace in my mind. Sorry to bring everyone down, i just needed someone to talk too. Thanks for listening, Tracy x
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: blackcat on January 12, 2008, 10:58:04 AM
Hi Tracey and welcome to Purrs, so sorry you had to find us in such sad circumstances. It is always hard when we lose a beloved cat (or any family member, really). There is no need to feel that you should be 'strong' as you are going through a grieving process we have all been through. Do stick with us here on Purrs though as you will find we do understand how you are feeling and can cheer you up when you are ready for our sillier posts!! You may want to compose a special tribute to Willow and post it under our Rainbow Bridge section. There are some wonderful stories there and some beautiful poems that may help you through this. Tell us all about it and we will see what we can do to help you through  :hug: :hug: :hug:
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 12, 2008, 11:04:36 AM
Thankyou Blackcat for your kind words, my only real comfort at the moment is the company of my other (fat black) cat Merlin.
I'll keep plodding on, one day at a time, and look forward to when i'm back to my normal happy self and can join in the fun!
Thanks again, big kiss X and purrrrr from Merlin x   
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Yvonne on January 12, 2008, 11:23:53 AM
Good morning Tracy and   :welcome:  to Purrs

So sorry to hear about your loss - if you want to pop along for a chat now I can stay for a few minutes or I should be on line later tonight after 8 pm.

Take care   :hug:
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 12, 2008, 11:38:00 AM
Thanks Yvonne, Im going out with my mum shortly, to get out of the house for a bit.
Hopefully catch up with you later x
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Tan on January 12, 2008, 12:03:17 PM
Hi Tracy hun

Warm  :welcome: to Purrs. :hug:

So sorry about your darlin Willow. So man y of us know what your are going through and we will be here to help you whenever you want us. I have lost 3 of my babes in last 2 years to rta and it still hurts but things do get easier as time goes on esp being able to love another babe. Sending lots of hugs over to you hun.  :hug:

Our darlin bridge babes will always be with us in our hearts, talk to them anytime cause they will hear you. One fantasic day we will see and hold them again.  :Luv:

 
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Christine (Blip) on January 12, 2008, 12:03:40 PM
 :welcome: to Purrs, Tracy and I am sorry that you join us in such sad circumstances.

Many, many folks on here understand what you are going through.  Do have a read of the poems as you may derive a little comfort from them  :hug:
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 12, 2008, 12:35:29 PM
Thankyou Christine, so many kind messages of support. Wot a luvverly bunch of people! xx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 12, 2008, 12:37:06 PM
Thankyou Tan, for your lovely message of support xxx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Sam (Fussy_Furball) on January 12, 2008, 12:52:02 PM
Hi Tracy,

I'm so glad you decided to join us and I hope we can help you through this difficult time.  I know it sounds like a cliche but it does easier with time.  Although the pain never really goes away in time you will be able think of Willow and smile.

I look forward to chatting more and when you feel up to it maybe you can post some pics of your special little girl  :hug:

Sam xx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 12, 2008, 13:36:50 PM
Great to hear from you Sam, feels like an old friends got in touch! Thanks again for all your support xx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: puddypaws on January 12, 2008, 17:14:24 PM
I think everyone on here will know how you feel, Madpants.  So many of us lost our furbabies over this last year and it is truly horrible.  Any time you need to talk there will always be someone on Purrs who will help.  I got wonderful support last year when I lost Portia and it helped so much.   :hug: :hug: :hug: to you
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Desley (booktigger) on January 12, 2008, 17:24:03 PM
I am sorry you have found us under such sad circumstances, and dont feel you will bring us down, we are here for the bad as well as the good, and sadly know what you are going through. You will get a lot of support here. Do make sure you give Merlin lots of hugs, it will make you feel better.
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Corporal Smokey on January 12, 2008, 19:19:46 PM
Hi Tracy, welcome to what's the most fun, friendly and yet symapathetic forum I've ever seen!

I'm feeling it a bit today too, we just lost two rescues to cat flu. They really got to me. And then there's the sad story of Cleo too.

Hopefully all of our babies-the ones who've been with us for 20+ years, the ones we rescue and see go to happy new homes to live their days, the ones that don't make it past bouncy kittens and the ones we never even meet but just read about are all happy somewhere. Each and every one of them is thought about and loved, even the hiding ferals we don't know about.

I bet the bridge is a very special place indeed.

Take care Tracy, if you want a more cheerful intro to Purrs and to take you away a little, join us in the cat's basket (chat) on Tuesday just before nine for the quiz.  :hug:
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: gibraltarcat on January 12, 2008, 19:32:31 PM
Hi there

I'm so glad you found this forum because what everyone else has said is true. We know all about that big empty hole inside you that hurts so much at present. Cuddle Merlin and tell him how you feel as well. Cats know when you are feeling upset and just seem to be extra sensitive to their human Mum, if that makes sense.

 :hug: :hug: xxx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 12, 2008, 20:04:47 PM
A HUGE big thankyou to all of you and all your lovely, lovely messages of support.
What a truly great bunch of caring people you all are  :thanks: :thanks: :thanks:
I don't know how i would have coped without so much support, your kind messages have made a huge difference.
BIg hugs and kisses to you all!
 :hug: :hug: :hug:

Tracy and Merlin xxxxxxxx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Gill (sneakiefeline) on January 13, 2008, 00:30:55 AM
Sorry I am a bit late on here but am sorrow to hear about Willow  :hug: :hug:

As the others have saids we all understand what you are going through, so just stick with us cos we will give you all the support we can  ;D
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: pappilon on January 13, 2008, 01:05:47 AM
Hi,so sorry for your loss :( just to say most of us here know about loosing a very speciall friend and how much it hurts, Dont worry about bringing us down,it helps to talk to people who understand what you are going through, just remember you are not aloane.  :hug: :hug: To you and Merlin .

Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: ccmacey on January 13, 2008, 03:05:29 AM
Yes it does seem extra hard on those days, 1 week, 1 month, 1 year. I used to hate Satardays because that was the day my cat passed. I still dont really like them now. But it does get easier and you will treasure your memories..... one day.


You can leave a little tribute on RB for Willow, and talk to peeps to share your pain  :hug:





Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: lucy on January 13, 2008, 08:48:07 AM
So sorry for your loss. :hug: It is an awful feeling, but in time does get better so you can remember  happy times together with Willow.
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Michelle (furbabystar) on January 13, 2008, 12:37:02 PM
Hi Hunny,

I think nearly everyone of us on here has been where you are.
I lost 4 furbabies in just over 2yrs so I know what you are going through.

I promise you that the pain will get less, it does take a while but at the moment you do need to grieve for Willow. This is the worse thing about loving a furbaby and letting them into our hearts.
Give Merlin extra cuddles, He will be missing Willow too.

Stick with us here on Purrs - We will all help you get through this.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 13, 2008, 14:48:34 PM
Once again, a HUGE BIG thankyou to all of you lovely people who have posted messages of support for me and Merlin.  :thanks:

Yesterday was very difficult, as it was a week since Willow left us, but my mum came up to stay and we went out for the day, to get out
of the house, which really helped.

It seems that the flip side of loving and caring for our lovely furries is feeling intense pain and sorrow when they go off to Rainbow Bridge  :'(

It really really helps though, knowing that there are lovely people out there who care, and i have taken alot of comfort in that.

THANKYOU ALL, YOU LOVELY LOVELY PEOPLE!  :Luv: :Luv: :Luv:

What would i do without you!
Big hugs and kisses to you all,

Tracy and Merlin xxx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Sam (Fussy_Furball) on January 13, 2008, 15:29:24 PM
Unfortunately Tracy you're right about the price we have to pay for love and friendship we get (and give) from our furries.  But as the old saying goes "it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved"

Give Merlin and big hug and tell him how much you love him and let him help you (remember cat fur is very good at soaking up tears  ;) )
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Gillian Harvey on January 14, 2008, 15:27:57 PM
So sorry about the loss of Willow, but as others have pointed out, it does get easier with time, although we never forget them of course and know that they are happy and contented waiting for us at Rainbow Bridge.  I lost my Suzie in July and Elsa in October last year, and I'm able to think about both of them now without tears, (most of the time!) although theres still a sadness and I miss them both like mad.  :hug:
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 14, 2008, 22:31:06 PM
Thanks Gillian for your kind message of support - Really appreciated
Like i said before, what a lovely bunch of people i've found on here :Luv2:
 :hug: :hug: :hug:
Tracy and Merlin
xxx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: sheryl on January 15, 2008, 16:41:22 PM
So very sorry for your loss, as others have said we have all been through the pain of losing a loved furbaby and in my case I never get over the loss but I learn to live with it.

You will find lovely "cyber" friends on here and I speak from personal experience when I say that they have helped me through some awful times.

Welcome to Purrs xxx

RIP Willow - play hard at the bridge little one xx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Garfield&Gypsy on January 15, 2008, 17:07:58 PM
Hi Tracy, I know exactly how you feel at the moment.

Luckily you still have a furbabe to snuggle up with i'm sure Merlin will provide you loads of comfort and cuddles. :hug:
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Ralph's mum (angie) on January 15, 2008, 17:29:57 PM
 :welcome: Tracy and Merlin

Sorry for your loss, I found this wonderful place when I found myself in your position in June when Bob my babe was taken suddenly to the bridge, everyone here is such a comfort and a tower of support and strength.  we are one big happy family and all you have to do is remember that we are here to help you through this sad time, after all thats what friends are for, so enjoy yourself I promise you, you will laugh and cry at the same time when you read some of the posts here and you will be supporting others who unfortunately find themselves in the same postion that you are in today, be strong and give Merlin a cuddle from me and a gentle head butt from Max

Angie n Max Monster xx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 15, 2008, 22:23:21 PM
Yet more lovely messages from lovely lovely people!

I would have felt so alone without this forum to express my thoughts and feelings. I think i am moving into the 'acceptance phase' now. I don't cry as much as i am starting to
remember the cute, crazy, naughty, things that Willow used to do, and starting to accept that she is not here. But i still feel the knot in my chest and would give anything to have her
back, just for 5 minutes to hold her again. I know that i will not be the same person after this experience, but hopefully i will be a better, more compassionate bod.
Hang on in there folks, things can only get better (am i sounding convincing yet?!)

Big love to you all
XXX
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 15, 2008, 22:24:58 PM
P.S. Purrs and big thanks to Angie and Max Monster
xxx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: clarenmax on January 16, 2008, 09:21:55 AM
Hiya, sorry I missed this thread before   :shy:

Just wanted to say I'm sorry for your loss  :hug:

Play hard on the Bridge little one
xx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 16, 2008, 17:39:35 PM
Thankyou Clare and Max! Max looks alot like my Merlin
xx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: caledonia on January 17, 2008, 23:10:37 PM
hi Madpants,

Sorry to hear about your loss but glad you have found this site - it really does help. I too found this site after losing my beloved wee Bertie on the 23rd of December. It does get easier although I still can be in tears with the slightest memory of him - although I smile a bit more now!

Everyone on here is lovely and I am sure you will take comfort in speaking to others.

xxx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 18, 2008, 07:32:45 AM
 :thanks:
Thankyou Caledonia for your kind words, It does get a bit easier as time goes by, i just wish more people truly understand the
intense grief we experience when we lose a beloved pet, as much as we would for any other member of the family, which of course they were.

My Merlin's doing a great job at easing the pain, bless him.
Thanks again
Hugs and purrs Tracy and Merlin
xxx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Felix (Caroline) on January 19, 2008, 17:00:38 PM
Hiya Tracey and I am also sorry about your loss, It is so hard when they go but they will never be forgotton xx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 19, 2008, 19:27:57 PM
Thankyou Felix's mum!

Its really tough, but it's easier with support from the lovely people on this forum! :Luv2:
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Felix (Caroline) on January 20, 2008, 10:36:03 AM
You are so welcome :Luv:
Everyone is fantastic on here they have helped me out lots of times. Caroline x
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 20, 2008, 11:03:35 AM
Its strange how so many things have changed since Willow went.....
I used to soooo look forward to the weekends, but the past two weekends have seemed so dreary and rubbish.  :'(
And its been very strained between myself and my husband as he simply cannot relate to how bad i am feeling, and feels that i should 'move on' and 'get over it'.
I feel as if i have withdrawn from him alot, he's always been supportive about things in the past, but this has driven a wedge between us for sure.

I've always been an extremly positive person, but i am finding it hard to find anything positive at the moment.
I'll keep on plodding......Merlin has been a great comfort of course!  :Luv:

Thanks for listening all,
xx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: lucy on January 20, 2008, 11:50:44 AM
 :hug:
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: Stuart on January 21, 2008, 21:20:51 PM
Hi Tracy,  :welcome: to Purrs

So Sorry to hear about Willow :(
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: smudgepickles on January 21, 2008, 21:31:52 PM
Hi Tracy and a very big welcome. Im sorry you have had to find us under such circumstances  :( :( :( my heart goes out to you and I know exactly how you feel. I lost my big brave boy Gizmo on the 11th June 2007 had it not been for the friends I have on here I dont know what I would have done.....

The void they leave is so unbearable and unless people are like us all caring and loving to our furbabies they dont understand. One of my best friends said when Gizmo died "Helen, you have 8 more and the dogs and horses" I wanted to never see her again, she didnt understand that he was the one special boy from all of mine

I have of late been able to talk about Gizmo but not about the day I lost   :( :( him just all the wonderful happy times he gave me  :hug:. I never thought I would ever be able to say "it does get easier" He is never far from my thoughts and I tell him I love him  :Luv2:  still before I go to bed and blow him a kiss as I do my Mum who is at the bridge too and not ever forgetting my other beautiful fur babies and horse at the bridge

We are all here for you always
big hugs and head kisses from my babies to you  :hug:
Helen
xx

xx
Title: Re: Help! I'm really sad
Post by: madpants on January 22, 2008, 11:12:24 AM
Hi Helen, Thank-you so much for your kind words of support, it really means alot that people out there REALLY understand how heart-breaking it can be when you lose a beloved pet. :Luv:

It can feel sooo isolating when people around you don't really understand and play down your grief as 'it was only a cat'. I have no time for those people.

Sorry to hear about Gizmo, i think alot of us have one particular 'special' pet who really gets under our skin.
I love my Merlin to bits but he is very independant and Willow really was my 'baby'.
I'm encouraged to hear that you can talk about Gizmo now and recall happier times - I look forward to
reaching that stage too  :'(

Thanks again for being there and caring,
Hugs and Purrs from Tracy and Merlin :hug:
xxx